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Original poster

What is something someone has said that is etched in your brain?

707 replies

WhiteNoiseMoreToys · 19/02/2023 21:49

Mine is when I was 17, pretty self conscious and just finished being intimate with my then boyfriend.

We decided to get up and go out and as I sat up to put my top on he poked my belly and said “Christ, you could feed Africa with that tyre” it baffles me now, how brazen it was to just come out with it. But I was a size 8-10 and honestly I think I’m still confused 😂

Its one of those things that ‘pop’ into my mind at random times ans it’s gout me wondering what others peoples ‘moments’ are when they remember something someone has said that might not have significance, but will always be remembered.

OP posts:
SomeoneSomewhere21 · 20/02/2023 02:31

Far too many horrible things but I’m trying to forget them and focus on the good.

Recently someone told me to stop apologising all the time.
Also “you matter too”. I’m trying to listen to them and believe that.

blacksheepofthefamily2 · 20/02/2023 02:32

My niece had some family problems.

She phoned me up and asked if we could have a chat as I could probably help, because she knew I was the black sheep of the family.

That was news to me!

Marie2023 · 20/02/2023 02:35

My DD from a previous relationship has SEN. When DH told SIL we were trying for a baby, she said: “So you want regarded children then?”

Marie2023 · 20/02/2023 02:36

Sorry, that should have said “Retarded”.

77toozy · 20/02/2023 02:39

Said to me by a grown man (40s) I met OLD the morning after we'd slept together 'A woman with children is twice the cost and only half the fun'. I was Shock wanker. Him and other idiots like him are the reason I refuse to OLD any more.

Chickenkeev · 20/02/2023 02:41

Mine's actually nice. I was at a gig as a teenager and a random fella said to me if you're as passionate about everything else in life as you are about this then you'll succeed. I was and i didn't succeed but I always felt it was a lovely thing to say.

StalkedByASpider · 20/02/2023 02:43

It's really sad that when asked about something that's etched on your brain, so many people have awful, cruel stories to tell.

I do think that perhaps we're programmed to remember the bad stuff and that the nice things get crowded out by the overwhelming feelings produced by the rotten things that you remember.

butterfliedtwo · 20/02/2023 02:46

Marie2023 · 20/02/2023 02:36

Sorry, that should have said “Retarded”.

Your SIL is vile and can go fuck herself. I hope your husband told her that.

Wincarnis · 20/02/2023 02:55

older sister let’s call her Amelia, petite blonde.

“You’re too fat to get a boyfriend, Amelia’s the pretty one”
”no one will want you looking like THAT”
”Amelia can take her pick, but you can’t”
”you’d better get a good job because no-one will want to marry you”

cheers Mum

Sickandtiredofbeingsick · 20/02/2023 02:57

My Mum, after I told her I was relentlessly bullied in high school- “Well it was your own fault, you should have told us and your Dad would have gone up the school!” 😕

My Mum, after I hadn’t seen her 3 years and I’d put weight on (we’d fallen out due to her narcissism)- “I didn’t recognise you, you look like you’ve got Down Syndrome!” 😳

DeoForty · 20/02/2023 02:58

I had an accident in my early 20s. Huge spinal surgery and months of rehabilitation to walk again (and other ISCI implications/mental health shitshow). About a year later I was able to walk well enough to go on a city break with my then boyfriend. He was striding ahead (!) when a girl came up to me to say she thought my outfit was lovely and I looked really cool. I was so chuffed. I caught up to my boyfriend and told him. His response 'urgh, you don't half love yourself'.

nothingmoreatthemo · 20/02/2023 03:00

A nice one recently: 'Everything's better when you're around'.

That meant the world. 🥰

Calistan · 20/02/2023 03:13

blacksheepofthefamily2 · 20/02/2023 02:32

My niece had some family problems.

She phoned me up and asked if we could have a chat as I could probably help, because she knew I was the black sheep of the family.

That was news to me!

Oh no, that's certainly a slap around the face. I bet she didn't even know how she came across.

I remember going on a night out with my "attractive" sister. Her and her friends took the piss out of a poor bloke who was disabled. I was utterly horrified and realised what a shallow cunt she was. She now likes Mrs Brown's boys, so obviously a twat lol

FredInYourHead · 20/02/2023 03:26

My step dad told me to get on my hands and knees so he could smash my head on the floor.

I was about 10 and was always left looking after my younger sibling, but whenever they had an accident or hurt themselves I always got the blame and some kind of punishment 😞

Anyway that time in particular my sibling fell of the bed and banged their head, which is why I had my head smashed on the floor too.

It still really gets to me, not only the physical abuse but the embarrassment and how small I felt too.

ShippingNews · 20/02/2023 03:26

When ds was a baby, a friend who was a clairvoyant said " your baby will have an unhappy life". I knew it was rubbish but it stuck in my head, and despite him being 33 now, I still tend to rush in and help to smooth over any problem that arises in his life. Crazy but I can't help myself.

CanadianJohn · 20/02/2023 03:50

Two things:

When I was 17, I joined the army cadets. On my first day I had to scour some mess tins on a river bank, using sand. I showed the result to my corporal, who said "You made an attempt; now do it properly."

In my early 20's, as a very callow youth, I went to a party wearing a red shirt, and the hostess said "You look dynamite in red!"

I've been wearing red ever since.

Marie2023 · 20/02/2023 03:59

@butterfliedtwo Thanks. It was a long time ago but still hurts. There were a few more nasty comments from her leading us to finally go NC coming up to 11 years ago.

CanadianJohn · 20/02/2023 04:11

Oh, I've just thought of a negative one...

45 years ago, I was a new stepdad to 3 pre-teens. The 10-year-old said sorrowfully "John, your ideas never work."

She was right. I quickly learned to defer to my new wife on everything. God alone knows how I survived living with myself.

Ireallydohope · 20/02/2023 04:30

FredInYourHead · 20/02/2023 03:26

My step dad told me to get on my hands and knees so he could smash my head on the floor.

I was about 10 and was always left looking after my younger sibling, but whenever they had an accident or hurt themselves I always got the blame and some kind of punishment 😞

Anyway that time in particular my sibling fell of the bed and banged their head, which is why I had my head smashed on the floor too.

It still really gets to me, not only the physical abuse but the embarrassment and how small I felt too.

How long was this awful man your stepdad?

Not too long I hope

Your story made my stomach churn for the small scared 10 Yr old you were

It breaks my heart on here how awful parents can be

Tophy124 · 20/02/2023 04:31

@FredInYourHead I hope you are no contact with that vile person! Just awful.

Tophy124 · 20/02/2023 04:32

@FredInYourHead I’m sure that made your sibling relationship very complex too. So sorry.

StrayGoose · 20/02/2023 04:34

Reading this thread makes me want to weep.

Tophy124 · 20/02/2023 04:39

@StrayGoose There have been some lovely ones on here too, but it is sad and probably true that it’s easier to recall negative moments.

Ireallydohope · 20/02/2023 04:42

Oh god I've just been reminded that when I was 14/15 I went to a party but we couldn't get a taxi home

When I finally got home at 3/4 am my parents opened the door together

My DM then grabbed my hair and smashed my head against the hallway wall a few times

I was in complete shock and confused (and a bit dazed) and then went up to bed after being also shouted at bit

Ireallydohope · 20/02/2023 04:43

This was the 80's so no mobile phones etc