Over heard in the swimming pool changing room today

[BankOfMaeve]

This made me smile so much.

Two small kids chatting to one another in the next cubicle after their swim.

they were clearly very impressed by the skills of a slightly older child.

“I think she’s a proper swimmer, she has one of those things on her head to cover her hair like they do in the Olympics, and she’s wearing a yellow band, which means she gets to stay in longer than us. She must be training for the Olympics.”

All this at a regular splash and play session in the council pool!

Smart girl

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Years ago my DD age 3 and in the bath said, “Look mum! I can blow bubbles with my bum!”

Been awake since 01:30 feeling fed up until I read these corkers. 🤣

Niece aged 5 needs toilet urgently so mummy having bath allows her in.
“What are those?” Niece says, pointing to mum’s breasts.
”They’re my breasts” says mum” You’ll have some when you grow older”
”Ha!” Scoffs niece,” Mine will be bigger than those!!!”

Not in a swimming pool changing room, but in the cAr on the way there, DS (then 6) was rummaging through the glove box and found a tampon.

DS: Mummy what is this?
Me: Age appropriate explanation of periods
DS: But it's not going to happen to me is it?

On the way home, more rummaging

"Mummy, you've got a whole box of your little soldiers!".

(At no point did I refer to tampons as little soldiers!)

My 4 year old DD is going through a fascination with pregnancy/childbirth and keeps asking if she can see/take pictures of my uterus and vagina. I told her we definitely aren't going to do that 😂. My mother is horrified as she still uses euphemisms at 60.

DS (14) is constantly disappointed that he doesn't need glasses, ever since his best friend age 8 has star wars themed ones.

Howling with laughter at all of these.

Mine is not a swimming pool related story but it's a bathroom one.
I promised my son who was around 12 at the time that we could go to my bedroom with snacks to watch a film for the afternoon, we used to do this often and get in our PJ's to do so, anyway I decided to have a wee while getting changed in the bathroom and I passed out (it happens from time to time)
My son who is autistic video calls my husband who was at work doing training so his phone was on a big screen, my son was telling him that he is fed up waiting for me as he wants to watch a film and eat his snacks, my husband asks why is it taking so long, my son just says "because of this" and turns the phone to my naked body laying on the floor for all to see.
It gets worse as I worked with these people as well, never lived the shame down.

DS2 was about 2 or 3 in a public toilet very excitedly shouted "mummy, you've got Batman on your pants!'

There were definite sniggers from adjacent cubicles

In the family changing room with our dd and d niece (3). All getting changed together with adults doing their best to be discreet. D niece points at DH Willy before he manages to pop on his swim shorts "oh my Daddy's got one of those but it's much bigger"
Poor DH gets changed separate now and leaves me with both girls

Granddaughter thinks nipples are pronounced 'nibbles'
She was in hysterics the other day when she heard someone plan a party with 'sips and nibbles'

When DC were very young, in the family changing room at the pool… Daddy, your Willy is huge!’ Said by DS very loudly. DH walked out the changing room about an foot taller 😆

We were in the Swimming pool shower last Saturday and my 4YO suddenly said in a voice that could wake the kraken ‘What’s that between your legs Mummy?’

It was the water, which had formed a sort of sheet between my legs. It did look odd, but I dread to imagine what the (many, many) other people in the showers thought.

Was in the public toilets a few days ago and I overheard a little boy singing in the cubicle next door, his mum said "we don't sing our happy song on the toilet", to which he replied "but having a poo makes me happy".

My heart melted a little.

My DS always used to compare the size of his toddler penis to his father’s understandably larger one.
At nursery , aged about 3, he proudly showed his spontaneous erection to a member of staff and exclaimed it was now a “Daddy Willy” “it’s big like Daddy’s “ and so forth.

That took some explaining , I can tell you.

He was later diagnosed with autism and still says things that would make an ordinary mortal quiver with embarrassment. Not me though, I’m practically Teflon these days.

Not having been to a public swimming pool for many years, I have missed out on a lot of stories it seems. Thank you to those who have shared theirs.

You shouldn't have said it was in the changing room, OP. Your story was very sweet but all you will get is bums and periods now. Should have said you heard them outside the pool.

DS1, aged 8, to DD2, aged 6: "Have you ever heard of the band Nirvana?"

DS2: "No, do they have any good songs?"

DS1: "I dunno but they wore disgusting old cardigans and didn't wash their hair"

😂😂

@JustDrama - I remember taking my cossie off after a mums and toddlers swim session and my DD literally sang out loud “big fat belly, wee tiny boobs” and I just thought “yeah great….cos that’s totally the look I’m going for”. I did get a lot of empathic, knowing smiles from the other mums.

My daughter (5) was concerned that her bagina (vagina) was too small for a baby to come out of. I explained that women's vaginas get bigger as they get older. Immediately realised my mistake when she looked at me with big round eyes and said:

"Granny must have a really massive bagina then"

Yeah, it has gone off on a tangent 😂

Me too. Loudly. I was in the farthest loo from the door with a looong queue who had all heard.

My youngest when around 2 said oh I like your tummy mummy it's all soft and squishy 😂. Erm yeah thanks for that love, that's what 4 children does to your tummy 😂

😂😂😂so cute she classes the dog as her brother