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If someone abandoned a baby on your doorstep, would you be tempted to keep it?

212 replies

acassadei · 03/02/2023 19:46

Inspired by the Dumbledore thread over in AIBU. Someone mentioned that (imaginary) Harry Potter was abandoned on a (imaginary) doorstep in November, and I felt a little stab of pure sadness and baby hunger. Should mention that DC1 is 6mo and I am VERY flooded with baby hormones at the moment.

anyway I know if someone abandons a baby in my doorstep legally I’d have to call the police and give it to social services, but I’d WANT to just keep it. And ethically, is there not some justification for that? Baby could just slot right into the family. Surely that’s less traumatic than going through the care system? You’d have to forge a birth certificate I suppose. But then you could just move right on with giving the baby a lovely life. No fuss, no mess, no drama, no tragedy. Would anyone else be tempted or is it just me? 😂

OP posts:
Wonderfulbutwornout · 03/02/2023 20:11

Absolutely no way. I have a 2 year old that pushes me to almost leaving him on a doorstep! (Lighthearted- he’s lovely, just very two!)

acassadei · 03/02/2023 20:11

@PuttingDownRoots oh I’m sorry, that must have been really tough 💐

OP posts:
Cocobutt · 03/02/2023 20:11

I don’t ever want any more children but if I had one on my doorstep or found one in a bin or something I would definitely keep it.

katienana · 03/02/2023 20:12

I would feel like it was fate for me to love that baby. But knowing my luck rather than the whimsical scenario painted by a pp it would probably turn out like The Omen!

Tamarindtree · 03/02/2023 20:12

No.

A friend many years ago adopted a very young baby. Baby had been born to criminals and drug addicts.

A year later they naturally conceived.

Both children were treated exactly the same and loved and cherished.

Sadly nature v nurture for them overruled the lovely upbringing and the adopted child turned out just like his parents and causes a lot of heartache and misery for the whole family as well as for them self.

So no I would not take a baby
in of unknown origin.

Obviously this is not going to happen with every baby born in unfortunate circumstances but I wouldn’t take the chance.

Dammitthisisshit · 03/02/2023 20:12

No way.

But I’d love the baby cuddles whilst waiting for the police/children’s services to collect it.

Tinner01 · 03/02/2023 20:12

katienana · 03/02/2023 20:12

I would feel like it was fate for me to love that baby. But knowing my luck rather than the whimsical scenario painted by a pp it would probably turn out like The Omen!

🤣🤣 me too, hence my little daydream lol

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 03/02/2023 20:13

Hell no. If I got pregnant tomorrow I would thank the lord that I live in a country with free and safe access to abortion and I wouldn’t look back.

I would definitely not be keeping a random baby in a box.

Viviennemary · 03/02/2023 20:13

Maybe for around half an hour

Wineandwinelalalala · 03/02/2023 20:13

I would gift to my sister lol she never met anyone to have kids with. 50 now so it’s a bit late now. She’s make a great mum.

Banjaxx · 03/02/2023 20:13

Fuck no

trampoline123 · 03/02/2023 20:14

I would even though my hands are way full.

BloodAndFire · 03/02/2023 20:15

God no. I've cleaned up enough shit in one lifetime.

Ruffpuff · 03/02/2023 20:16

Well, yes in a way. I’d want to comfort the poor thing. But I’d never dream of just keeping it. It’s completely unethical.

TomatoSandwiches · 03/02/2023 20:16

Absolutely not..... I don't answer my door unless I'm expecting someone anyway 😂

Headstones250 · 03/02/2023 20:17

JofraArchersFastestBall · 03/02/2023 19:49

Came here to write exactly that.

I came to say kitten!

acassadei · 03/02/2023 20:18

I’m enjoying all these answers, thanks everyone 😁 So glad I didn’t post this question on aibu 😂😂😂

OP posts:
FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 03/02/2023 20:18

I would happily look after a new baby for a few weeks, maybe even months but I wouldn't want to raise another child forever. I have my one DD, she's 8yo and wonderful but 1 is enough.

OuiLaLa · 03/02/2023 20:21

I am with you op - would 100% keep if I could. I would consider it destiny/fate/the universe which put us together.

But I think I could have an infinite number of children.

Bit of a change from my twenties when I had so little regard for them I barely noticed them!

ThisIsWednesday · 03/02/2023 20:21

I would. If adopting babies worked on a Finders Keepers system I would raise that baby in a heartbeat even though my kids are much older and I'm finished with the baby years.

But I'm always broody though I loved all stages of my kids. Screaming newborns, toddlers, primary, and now even the teen years are great. So far.

Justalittlebitduckling · 03/02/2023 20:22

Perhaps the world can be divided into those who fantasise about finding an abandoned baby and those who fantasise about abandoning their baby. Which category do I fall into? I couldn’t possibly comment.

handsoffate · 03/02/2023 20:22

My kids would probably try and sell the baby on eBay or swap it for a kitten, so no.

Newyearnewme1 · 03/02/2023 20:23

SleepingStandingUp · 03/02/2023 19:57

I have 3 yo twins, you'd be lucky if Iet it in the door. Or I'd swap it for the twins... DS would demand we kept it forever.

Lol I also have 3 year old twins and both me & DH wouldn’t let it through the door, we absolutely could not do it ever again 😂

cindylawless · 03/02/2023 20:24

If it was cute, yes. If an ugly baby, no.

Sorry, but some babies are bloody ugly! And some are lucky and have lovely even features from day 1 Smile

Ted27 · 03/02/2023 20:25

@Luckydog7

That happened in the USA which has a very different approach to fostering and adoption
Wouldn't happen here - they would have to get approved as foster carers or adopters. Social services wouldn't just hand a baby to random people just because they happend to find it.