Guardian and Telegraph have an embargoed story - front page embargoed till 1.30 am. I wonder what it is?

[cakeorwine]

Will it be a Royal story? Harry at the Coronation?

Or something about Zahawi and taxes

what would expire on 31st January?

could be it’s a tax thing. But it’d have to be a pretty big tax thing.

Or a Brexit thing. Jan 31 o
was one of the big dates.

I think that's because there's another Simon Cowell who runs Wildlife Aid Foundation who has terminal lung cancer. That appears to have created confusion and rumours about the more famous Simon Cowell.

Jacob Rees Mogg revealed as UK eurovision entry.

I'm so tired. I hope this is worth it but to be honest the only thing breaking news to me right now is energy costs are back to pre October rates and inflation is going down. Anything else I don't think I care about. Ooh maybe a pay rise for all the strikers.

The Simon Cowell rumours are about his health rather than sexuality.

I assumed it was that he's finally switching back to white toilet paper. That would be BIG news.

Jacket Potato is Jon Bon Jovi

Probably something as banal as Johnson being divorced on the grounds of adultery.

If it's bloody royal shit, I'll be so annoyed. I want Sunak/Tories going DAAAHHN

Stacey Solomon’s birth announcement

I am not interested in the weight and length, we know it's a girl.

Rees Mogg keeps hedgehogs in big white Y-fronts for pleasure.

I'm going to bed if it's not out at 1.30am. Got to be up at 6.30am and I had 3 hours sleep last night.

Hahaha @BertaHoon

what would expire on 31st January?

Oooooh, I know this one.... is it.... January?!

Yes, it has all been a dream. Everything is OK. Pop yourself in the shower @007DoubleOSeven and everything will be back to normal before you can say "where's me towel?"

I want to go to bed!

Berta

🤣🤣

😂😂😂

Wasnt that a storyline in The Windsors? Maybe she got the idea from that.

Come on Guardian! Break it! Throw that shit down now!

I'M SO TIRED. This better be good. Otherwise I might not stay up for further hedgehogs. I mean embargoes.

Repeal of GRA

Has anyone got access to the Torygraph?

I need the loo, I am too invested to move.

Ooh that was at Jacket Potato is Jon Bon Jovi.

Tickled me. The laugh. I've just cleared the quote again.

You had to be there.