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Original poster

Dressing gown of doom

144 replies

peaceandpotato · 30/01/2023 10:47

DH is wearing the dressing gown of doom. I was ill last week and all I got was "you'll be alright" so I'm just going to ignore the dressing gown of doom. But why. Why does it appear? I swear it makes it worse. It's like a coded message for "you're on your own with the kids don't ask me I'm wearing the dressing gown"

OP posts:
ForgottenNurseryRhymes · 30/01/2023 15:17

This thread has cheered me up no end! Thanks gang 😊

ThatshallotBaby · 30/01/2023 15:22

IglesiasPiggl · 30/01/2023 13:57

The Dressing Gown of Doom must be accompanied by the Slippers of Shuffllage if he is serious.

Slippers of shufflage Grin
You are so right!
I know I’m in for the long haul if those come out

Notjusta · 30/01/2023 15:25

It's the revolting honking of snot that I can't bear. Blow your bloody nose Envy

I have hidden the DGOD because my DH wears his with nothing at all underneath and then frequently re-ties it. NO THANK YOU.

GoldenCupidon · 30/01/2023 16:04

Notjusta · 30/01/2023 15:25

It's the revolting honking of snot that I can't bear. Blow your bloody nose Envy

I have hidden the DGOD because my DH wears his with nothing at all underneath and then frequently re-ties it. NO THANK YOU.

Mine can't seem to blow his nose properly either. I've genuinely considered googling an online tutorial and sending it to him from an anonymous email but I think he'd know it was me.

MermaidEyes · 30/01/2023 19:54

I have hidden the DGOD because my DH wears his with nothing at all underneath and then frequently re-ties it. NO THANK YOU.

Bet your postie and delivery drivers say the same when he's answering the door 😆

Thesystemonlydreamsintotaldarkness · 30/01/2023 19:58

Oh… I’m laughing at this… it’s actually me who is the drama queen. DH is hardly ever ill. He had Covid in July and I practically forced him to stay in bed for a day to recover. But, I’m a complete drama queen while ill. DH went on holiday years ago and bought me a tiny violin!

Stressybetty · 30/01/2023 20:01

My DH doesn't have a dressing gown and always soldiers through any illness. However exDH was terrible, grey towelling robe on, slippers, weak shaky voice, forced smile like he's trying to be brave, drove me mad. Worst thing was his mum telling me I had to take better care of him. Am well rid of that one!

GuyFawkesDay · 30/01/2023 20:05

Mine now owns the Oodie of Affliction.

Also the slippers. Which honk.

And refuses paracetamol. I told him to stop whining and take something that makes him feel better, like I did when I had covid recently. He's got a cold, but oh! The drama!!!

redspottedmug · 30/01/2023 20:23

Oh the weak shaky voice - especially when used to call in sick.

Quavering and feeble accentuated with tiny coughs and loud sniffing.

How I don't miss being a line manager.

mrsmacmc · 30/01/2023 20:38

@AnybodyAnywhere oh the Oscar winning performance when DH had crutches 🩼 and a boot 🤦‍♀️ you have my sympathy and solidarity!

Cherrysoup · 30/01/2023 20:50

Somethingsnappy · 30/01/2023 14:44

My DH has a big poncho with an enormous hood, inside which he retreats when he's not well. I hear groans and growls from that direction intermittently.

The poncho of petulance.

I’m dying! 🤣

WimpoleHat · 30/01/2023 20:55

*My response is always 'have you taken anything?'

The answer is always 'no'.*

Oh God - this drives me mad. You’ve got a cold, mate - take a couple of paracetamol and get on with it. What is it with men and their reluctance to take tablets?

DuesToTheDirt · 30/01/2023 20:59

When my DH is ill he likes to sit glumly at meals, pulling faces, groaning, unable to eat anything or just picking at his food. And putting the rest of us off eating anything too! If I feel ill (once in about 300 years mind you) I take myself off out of the way.

Highabovethetrees · 30/01/2023 21:05

Koicrap · 30/01/2023 14:30

I’m the one with the grey dressing gown of doom. 🤣

My husbands the stoic one.

Ha ha, me too 🤣

CustardGoodJamGoodMeatGood · 30/01/2023 21:06

DP wears a Hoody of Sufference underneath his DGOD for double effect, he'll drag himself to the couch where he will sit and dramatically shivver to show how poorly he is and throw a few of those pathetic coughs in every now and again just incase I'd forgotten about his minor illness

CorpusCallosum · 30/01/2023 21:11

This has been just what I needed to read.

The DGOD was brought out here this weekend. Ay gods.

Strange how the loss of hand function associated with an mild sore throat didn't extend to scrolling on a phone.

Laiste · 30/01/2023 21:15

At the slightest hint of a cold XH used to get into the bloody fetal position in an armchair and lose the ability to speak properly.

I used to stand and look at him and contemplate murdering him or leaving him. In the end i did the later.

New DH is fantastic when ill, same as me 😃Retains a sense of humour as far as poss and soldiers on unless it's properly awful - and in that case just retires quietly to bed for a while.

citybumpkin · 30/01/2023 21:19

Do any of you find that said "dressing gown of doom" increases "man fluff" around the house? Since my partner has been wearing his "shroud" around the house I find his "doom" is littered everywhere. Obviously this adds to my neverending list of tasks to do... Now its 'clean up doom dust'.

closingscore · 30/01/2023 21:23

Mine clutches his stomach as he shuffles, even if it's his head that's hurting.

HighlandCowbag · 30/01/2023 21:27

Dh gets a crick in his neck when he is ill. I say ill but if anyone was as ill as he says he is they would have died of the poorly by now.

Bizarrely he has actually nearly died twice and carried on without much fuss until the ambulances carted him off. And neither time did he have his head at a weird angle.

ShowOfHands · 30/01/2023 21:33

DH is very stoic (for example, he worked for 5 days with meningitis before being physically unable to stand upright and presenting at hospital, was once knocked unconscious in a bike accident and discharged himself later that day and so on) but on day one of rest days, the fucking dgod comes out. He comes off a night shift and I get it, he's tired, but the weak quavering voice, the shuffle, the limp clutch of the door frame as he trundles through. Sweet fucking Moses. Go the fuck to bed and sleep instead of haunting your way across the ground floor, yowling like a dying cat.

Tessisme · 30/01/2023 21:51

DP just wears the same old fleece when he's ill, with the addition of food stains where he has bravely attempted to transport various snacks into his poor little chick's beak in a semi horizontal position. But it's the croaky, quavering voice that drives me round the bend. It makes me want to put him out of his misery.

HeyBearILoveYou · 30/01/2023 21:53

Mine shuffles round in baggy, thin jersey shorts, with no pants on underneath. Then when he (inevitably) flops on the sofa you can bet your bottom dollar something will fall out.

Nobody needs to be the the vicinity of Peeping Bollock Shorts.

Original poster
peaceandpotato · 30/01/2023 21:55

He's not been out of it all day. Must be serious. Still won't take a paracetamol.

OP posts:
NewNameForXmas · 30/01/2023 21:55

MeinKraft · 30/01/2023 11:34

They always look like this and have a faint honk off them too (or a strong honk if you're unlucky)

I wish mine looked like that... he's more this

Dressing gown of doom
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