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Original poster

Dressing gown of doom

144 replies

peaceandpotato · 30/01/2023 10:47

DH is wearing the dressing gown of doom. I was ill last week and all I got was "you'll be alright" so I'm just going to ignore the dressing gown of doom. But why. Why does it appear? I swear it makes it worse. It's like a coded message for "you're on your own with the kids don't ask me I'm wearing the dressing gown"

OP posts:
Eastereggsboxedupready · 30/01/2023 12:33

Trick missed op....
Yes dh you look terrible pet. Take yourself off to bed..
Shut door and get on with your day. Don't even remember he is home!
Bliss.
Exh only did it a few times. Wasn't pandering to that shit...

GoldenPineapple88 · 30/01/2023 12:34

@LyndaSnellsSniff the hoodie of sufference 😂 this actually made me laugh out loud.

The dressing gown of doom is my favourite mumsnet expression - perfectly sums up the situation. Hugs of solidarity OP, good luck and hope it doesn't last too long!

Caramac555 · 30/01/2023 12:37

Anybody, you are heartless. Also, I think we could be friends. I hope he didn't crack a rib when he broke that leg, otherwise you're in for a really bad time. Although you could always drive over a few speed bumps

CaptainCorellisXylophone · 30/01/2023 13:00

StarsSand · 30/01/2023 12:17

My response is always 'have you taken anything?'

The answer is always 'no'.

And then I decide it can't be that bad if he didn't organise himself to shuffle over to the medicine cabinet for some paracetamol.

Later that day: more shuffling and agonised looks

Me: Have you rung the GP?

Him: No

And then I stop caring. I have every sympathy for the sick who are trying to get well. But not for those who lean in to every tinge of the throat unnecessarily.

This, exactly this.

If adults can't even self medicate, I can't be expected to be concerned in any way.

Deathraystare · 30/01/2023 13:08

My dad would wander around in the dressing gown my Aunt made for him with a dragon on the back. He had a small bottle of whisky in his pocket and a cravat around his neck. Mum would comment that he looked like Noel Cowards. That is when she wasn't shouting David! Get to bed! She hated when he was wandering around snuffling and groaning!

Onwayoutsoon · 30/01/2023 13:08

LyndaSnellsSniff · 30/01/2023 11:28

My DH dons the Hoodie of Sufferance.

First sign of a sniffle; hoodie on, hood up, lies on sofa turned away from the room and adopts a penguin-like waddle as he bimbles aimlessly round the house looking for sympathy.

😂

DartholomewSpaceInvader · 30/01/2023 13:12

Deathraystare · 30/01/2023 13:08

My dad would wander around in the dressing gown my Aunt made for him with a dragon on the back. He had a small bottle of whisky in his pocket and a cravat around his neck. Mum would comment that he looked like Noel Cowards. That is when she wasn't shouting David! Get to bed! She hated when he was wandering around snuffling and groaning!

Omg, I am dying!! 😂

isthismylifenow · 30/01/2023 13:15

My ds has a red gown, when he is wearing it for warmth, we call him 'Who, Hugh Hefner'. Sometimes shortened to Hoo Hoo.

He is partial to a migraine, and then there is when he is feeling stuffy and has a cold (just a cold):

during those times, of course it has to be 'Who, Flu Hefner.' Sometimes shortened to 'Hoo Floo'

ThatshallotBaby · 30/01/2023 13:19

Oh yes. And walking as though they’ve just been shot in the stomach. And catching everything the dc have, except they don’t. I swear dh’s eyes light up when somebody gets a cold.
Pathetic voice - ‘I think I’ve got what ds has’
Er no you really haven’t dh.

isthismylifenow · 30/01/2023 13:21

AnybodyAnywhere · 30/01/2023 12:30

Trust me ladies, it can be worse! Oh the drama 😳😳😂

Oh you have my sympathy Anybody....

I had to endure a full leg plastered h (now ex, I am sure this injury was a factor) for 3 months!!!

Have you noticed how they cannot use their arms due to having a sore leg....

And it was a self inflicted injury, for which I got the blame!

WalterWitty · 30/01/2023 13:33

I May start a 2023 sickness journal for DH. I apparently have no sympathy for him, and must admit I do often roll my eyes, however, I don’t think he actually comprehends just how often he tells me he is ‘coming down with something’ it’s Bi-weekly!

It’s just constant for the poor little lamb. He manages to suffer through it all without needing any paracetamol as, he ‘needs to see where he is with it’🧐 I don’t know what this means but I just have no patience with any of it.

There will also be the occasions where we’ll both have the same cold or whatever at the same time, and like an actual functioning parent, I just carry on as normal (no choice do we) whilst he will die a slow death, when I pick him up on the difference between the severity of our symptoms, he acts shocked as how can I possibly believe we have the same thing?! His is always much much worse.

God their twats aren’t they…

doesthisonework · 30/01/2023 13:46

My DH likes to talk me through the consistency of his snot and its changes throughout the duration of a cold.

IglesiasPiggl · 30/01/2023 13:57

The Dressing Gown of Doom must be accompanied by the Slippers of Shuffllage if he is serious.

Clawdy · 30/01/2023 14:04

LyndaSnellsSniff · 30/01/2023 11:28

My DH dons the Hoodie of Sufferance.

First sign of a sniffle; hoodie on, hood up, lies on sofa turned away from the room and adopts a penguin-like waddle as he bimbles aimlessly round the house looking for sympathy.

So funny!

MeinKraft · 30/01/2023 14:13

ThatshallotBaby · 30/01/2023 13:19

Oh yes. And walking as though they’ve just been shot in the stomach. And catching everything the dc have, except they don’t. I swear dh’s eyes light up when somebody gets a cold.
Pathetic voice - ‘I think I’ve got what ds has’
Er no you really haven’t dh.

Yeah if one of our young children gets sick, instead of being sympathetic mine moans 'oh I'm definitely going to get that now' Envy

AnybodyAnywhere · 30/01/2023 14:17

isthismylifenow · 30/01/2023 13:21

Oh you have my sympathy Anybody....

I had to endure a full leg plastered h (now ex, I am sure this injury was a factor) for 3 months!!!

Have you noticed how they cannot use their arms due to having a sore leg....

And it was a self inflicted injury, for which I got the blame!

Show quote history

Isthismylifenow exactly! Hands and arms are useless 🤷🏻‍♀️

He went to wash the car, trod in a puddle which turned out to be ice, broke ankle. Totally my fault because I drove to Lincolnshire 😂😂

CalpolDependant · 30/01/2023 14:17

And can we talk about the volume of sneezes? What the fuck is that about?

Justmuddlingalong · 30/01/2023 14:24

DP (male) once commented that he thought he had sore guts in sympathy with me...when I had bad period pains. He said it once and only once, probably because of my premenstrually crazy reaction.

Koicrap · 30/01/2023 14:30

I’m the one with the grey dressing gown of doom. 🤣

My husbands the stoic one.

Dontstepinthecowpat · 30/01/2023 14:36

Please whatever you do don’t pack the DGOD into hospital bags if they ever have to be admitted. I can confirm it renders men unable to use a light switch or pour from their water jug.

Toddlingturtle · 30/01/2023 14:39

Conversation with DP last week when he had a cold

DP: I feel terrible, I've got the worst cold I've every had and I'm never ill apart from every other sodding week
Me: What have you taken for it?
DP: Nothing, I hate taking medicine.
Me: ok well you're not going to feel much better if you don't take anything
DP: I'll think about it.

Next day. The extremely mild cold, has necessitated a lot of lying on the sofa watching sport but DP informs me that it is in fact the most terrible chest infection, and he can't believe he has such a terrible chest infection and he can't sleep / breathe or move but obviously he also can't take a paracetamol for the extremely mild cold.

Me: Well if it's that bad perhaps you should speak to a GP and get some antibiotics
DP: I don't take medicine and I'm absolutely definitely never ever ever going to take antibiotics (i'd rather rather sit here, annoy you and moan)
Me: Well I'm not entirely sure what you want me to say to that

Does my head in

Somethingsnappy · 30/01/2023 14:44

My DH has a big poncho with an enormous hood, inside which he retreats when he's not well. I hear groans and growls from that direction intermittently.

The poncho of petulance.

MermaidEyes · 30/01/2023 15:01

Dear God I'm so glad my husband doesn't own a dressing gown 😆
DD definitely has a hoodie of sufferance though!

NancyPickford · 30/01/2023 15:02

The volume of sneezes! It's horrendous, and there are usually multiple ones in each bout. I honestly fantasise about wielding a giant frying pan to the side of his head.
I, on the other hand, sneeze like a little sickly kitten saying 'cheese'. 😁

Preferfriday · 30/01/2023 15:09

Somethingsnappy · 30/01/2023 14:44

My DH has a big poncho with an enormous hood, inside which he retreats when he's not well. I hear groans and growls from that direction intermittently.

The poncho of petulance.

Dear God! 😂😭😂