What am I doing wrong at the weekend?

[Mybloodycat]

Just to start, I am a single mum and I work almost full time and I am too poor for cleaners/ironing ladies etc

What am I doing wrong at the weekend?

I have spent today working solidly to catch up, shopping, cleaning, washing (loads of washing despite also washing in the week), ironing (loads of ironing), batch cooking some stuff, just endless, I’ve been on the go since 8am.
Tomorrow I have a shit load more to do, and it’s all stuff I need to do just to keep us functioning.

Everyone I know is off doing things, lots of people are out at weekends with their kids then have nights out planned.
Despite cleaning through the week and washing through the week, my weekend is still full of this shit.

I don’t seem to have any time for myself at all.

I’m shattered and I know something has to give. I don’t have massively high standards, but I do need to clean, and my clothes always need ironing, no matter how I hang them. I’ve done loads of ironing today and obviously I need to shop. I know I could swap to online shopping but I often need the reduced section as I am on quite a budget, so I like to go myself.

Any tips? How do you all free up your weekends?

👏👏👏

I agree full time working parent to 3 DC with one still relevant is a lot of work especially if you haven't (yet) trained them to pitch in.

Ditto - the younger ones shouldn't need a clean shirt every day.
Do you have an airing cupboard? I hand loads in mine.
Ceases should drop out.
That said, I am a lone parent to a teenager and work full time.
Honestly it's really only in the last couple of years that I've 1) feel a step ahead of things, rather than always on catch up or knowing it'll pile if you go out for the day and 2) I've got time to myself.

If you are gunna hang washing then can do a lesser spin but if tumbling do the maximum you can.

Could you dedicate an hour one evening a week for the whole family to clean the house. DC can do their own rooms and living room and you do the rest?

If they come home and change into pyjamas, where is all the washing coming from? Do they have more than one jumper/skirt? Just wash it all on Friday night, dry it over the weekend.

So one set Mon-Wed then change. That’s what I did with mine. All in 2 washes of white and coloured on Friday night.

I think the only solution would be to change jobs to one which allows a better work life balance. Perhaps working from home or less hours, I understand this may not always be easy to find but there’s many options out there.

Let’s not forget some people do get help. They have family who take up the slack. Sone parents wash and iron for their adult dcs. Some parents take the grandkids to hobbies/school/events. Some parents do housework/diy for their adult children.
Some of the people you see out and about will have help.

I tried batch cooking and it's just not sustainable. It's so much work at the weekend and you need to be in the mood for it. I also find the dinners end up a bit samey and similar to each other.
I do a weekly menu for lunches and dinners and then stock up on snacks. I look at the diary and see what we are up to in case we are out for a lunch or dinner etc and don't overbuy. As you work, stick to quick, easy meals and slow cooker options. Pizza baguettes, warm ham and cheese tortillas with wedges, burgers and salad, scrambled eggs on toast with Italian ham on top, slow cooker curries, stews, creamy pasta dishes, chilli etc. You can still batch cook on the go, so make loads of chilli or Bolognese or curry when you eat it and freeze some. Do you have an air fryer? I've found this a game changer for cutting down on time.
Decluttering should be the trend now, just get rid of all the absolute toot. Let's teach our kids that we do not need to fill our homes with stuff, spend your money on experiences and let's not leave them with all the clutter to deal with one day when we are not here. It's a huge overwhelming project but it's literally one of the best things you can do for everyone. 15 minutes a weekend, get a box and a bag, focus on one area/drawer/cupboard, full the box with items to donate, fill the bag with things to be thrown away. Your kids could do this with their rooms as well. Set a timer, just 15 minutes, don't let it take over your precious weekend time. once the box is full, bag it up, take it to the charity shop and DON'T BUY ANYTHING. You'll probably be done in a year.

Put a timer on for 15mins and then everyone has to tidy (younger DC might need direction).
Its amazing what you can done and you’ve basically done an hours tidying/cleaning in 15 mins.

Keep a bag for donating somewhere near front door/coat cupboard.
When it’s full, take it either to clothing bank if clothes only or charity shop etc.

If the kids find it hard to get rid of their old toys, tell them they can keep half of money made if you sell them online.

Yes, let’s not compare ourselves to others. We don’t know what additional help other parents are receiving or what else is going on in their lives. We shouldn’t care either as we should be focusing on what we’re doing and what we need to make our lives better.

I’m sure we’re all doing our best and a great job. Just ensure the kids are fed, clean, safe, happy and out the door on time. IMO, raising children is the hardest and most challenging jobs in the World, especially if you’re also in paid employment inside or outside of the home. And don’t forget to look after yourself too (put your life jacket on first).

*What we need to do to make our lives better

I'm a single parent working full time too, with no family support, and my weekends are just like yours. I've never managed to make creases disappear by using the tumble dryer, no idea why not, so I iron too. Its really tough - I actually dread the summer when gardening also gets added to the list of chores. I try to keep myself going by having regular TV programmes that I look forward to sitting down and watching, sad though that might sound.

Definitely get shop delivered, that was a game changer for me.

I break up cleaning through the week, so I don't have to do it all in one go at the weekend.

Thanks for the replies, unfortunately the washing just appears. I wear clothes for work, my eldest has both uniform and a full PE kit to wash, plus she does a club which also creates washing (sweaty) as she is quite sporty, the PE kit and club gear in itself is a mission.
As I have said, it’s proving a struggle to get it all washed and dried as the youngest seems to attract dirt and is often needing an entire uniform change on a Monday!
I wear dark clothes to work, and they are heavier to dry.

Buy extra from second hand uniform shop or donations, perhaps that may help with the fish to get it dried.

My washing is non stop too. I put a load on before work usually.

*Wash not fish lol!

Nope I mean rush! Not gosh nor wash

Offs I give up

I'm a single parent working full time with no help, however only have one DC and he's older so does his share of chores. I set aside one evening a week for ironing, so it's only a week's worth of clothes to do and doesn't take that long. I hoover and dust once a week on Sunday afternoons, takes only a hour. Usually clean my bathroom on a Friday afternoon as I finish work early that day. Do about 4 loads of washing a week and one of those is bedding, so not that much.

DS is in charge of cleaning his own bedroom, changing his bed and doing dishes.

1. I never iron
2. the kids can help, maybe not the 6 yr old but the 10 and 14 yr old def can help
3. stick washing on in the evenings, frees up your daytime for fun activities
4. life is too short to spend your efforts doing cleaning all weekend, just live. A bit of dirt hurts nobody.

I have a 5 year old and a 1 year old. I do 3 lots of washing a week. I never iron. I wear things more than once so do the children and the world does not end. People in general wash far too often, cut down, washing takes up far too much time. If you must iron just do the shirts, leave the rest.