Children are boring

[Bobbin35]

Very much following on from a thread on here about Greg James. It’s very true for me children are boring and I don’t want children. It’s very annoying that friends of mine insist I be interested in their child beyond asking how they are. If I started ensuring all my friends liked dogs, horses (that I own) I think I would lose friends very quickly but many of my friends assume I am their friend so therefore have to also be interested in their child. I’m not a bad friend I just don’t want to talk children at all just as I wouldn’t want to bore anyone I know about my horses if they are not horse people!

Not to the recipient 🤣
Both are boring unless it's something actually interesting to share, interesting in general to most people, not interesting to you.

So what draws you to mumsnet?

But it's true. OP is right, they ARE boring!! They might even be cute but they are boring. I've met alot of new mums recently at mum groups, and the friendships that I've phased out are the ones that only revolve around our kids. I love that I have some friends who have the same age kids and going through the same thing at the same time, and it's nice to talk about but equally I don't want to talk about that for the majority of the time. I've equally made some great friends now that I really connect with, we talk about all sorts of things. That's what makes it interesting.

The day to day with my kids is boring, as is the day to day with my cats. I can't imagine that any friend, childfree or not, cat free or not, would want to hear about either. However, I would consider you to have no sense of humour if you couldn't see the funny side of me stepping in literal human shit on Mother's day, or my black cat only sitting in my lap when I have a huge deadline that needs him to be anywhere but. I would also consider you a crap friend if you weren't interested in what was stressing me personally out, whether it is the social issues one of my kids is having, the fact that I think the elderly cat may be developing kidney disease, or the deadlines I have at work.

Hear, hear

I worship my kid. Others find him charming. Some others think he’s a precocious little brat. I don’t think you’d like him. But that’s just fine!

It's fine to find kids boring but not showing any interest in your friends children doesn't make you a good friend. I have friends and family who don't have kids and don't want them but they still show an interest in mine as they are part of my life.

Sounds more like you have a child phobia

Most people spend half their life with their kids and the other half at work so naturally kids and work are top conversations because they’re the things they’ve been doing/interested in.
I agree, I don’t really like other people’s kids but my best friends kids I have affection and love for because I love their mums. I don’t mind them talking about the things they love most.

All boring in my opinion, particularly the DH stuff, yawn. Would much rather hear about your daughter’s new dodgy boyfriend or how your toddler told you your food is ‘scusting’ (the latter happened to me yesterday 😭)

Anything can be interesting, in moderation, if you are talking to a friend you have a rapport with and they are an interesting person.

Just think back to school and uni days, the best lecturers can make the most boring subject come to life.

All babies are boring, children however are great fun if you give them a chance, even other people's, especially when it's someone you love. It's a shame you'll miss out on that but each to their own.

We could be friends OP. I find children boring, too. Even though I have one, and I’m a big fan of him, time with a small kid is largely tedious. I do have horses and dogs and various other animals which are much more interesting to talk about.

Both are boring unless it's something actually interesting to share, interesting in general to most people, not interesting to you.

Why in God's name would listening to you whinge about your DH, bang on about your holiday, and whine about work be any more interesting to most people than kids or pets?

Tbh DH is only now a pain since I've had DC. I don't bang on, whine or whinge (well I hope not), but I do have alot of friends so I assume I have good conversation, as they keep coming back! I'd much rather hear about a friends holiday to some exotic location than something boring about her kids (obviously happy to hear if she's having some dilemma or issue she wants to talk about). That's me, and that's my friends. It's not even like we consciously decide this, it's just kids and pets don't dominate the conversation, and I'm very happy about that 🤷‍♀️

Weird views of friendship here.

If someone bores you constantly with their conversation, why are you friends?

But if you ARE friends and care about them, why wouldn’t you be interested in hearing about what’s going on in their life, what’s important to them etc? (which might include their children, if they have them).

I don’t tend to develop friendships with people I feel I have nothing in common with or who I find boring. However, once I’m friends with someone, I’m m happy to listen to what they have to say and share in their life, even if it doesn’t affect me.

I have a friend who is 30, I’m 45. She shows me pics of her toddler and moans about how hard it is climbing the career ladder. I moan about the menopause and parenting teenagers and being a manager. We’re mates, so it’s all good.

See, and we could not be friends. Whining about your husband is worse than talking about kids.

The DH stuff is yawn I agree. I keep this to a minimum, only as an outlet when I'm very upset. I would find your toddler story funny, but even now I would not want to do toddler talk for very long; I spend my day with a toddler so want to hear about adult things when I have the opportunity to talk to an adult. My DC brings me joy, other kind not do much, or only in small doses ... because I agree with OP, kids are boring! Other people's kids anyway 😆

I'm one as well :-)

I didn't like kids when I was one. I just wanted to grow up as soon as possible. Everything about being a child bored me then and bores me still - inlcuding children themselves.

I prefer animals too. I have a dog who is the centre of my universe. I don't care whether some random parent thinks that I'm wrong for thinking that. Love is subjective and we can never know how another person loves....whether a child or not. All we can do is accept that to me: the creature I love most in the world is my dog. To someone else, it is their child. To another person it is their cat.....and so on.

I decided a long time ago that being patronised and insulted by parents who judge me for my life choices (note I don't judge them) is a waste of my precious time on this Earth. SO I ditched them all. Now my life is full of childfree people or people with adult children.

I have kids. Of my 5 closest friends, 4 are childfree. One has two cats, one has a cat and a dog, one is a history and model train nerd, and one is really, really into food and travel. I like to hear about all of those things, and ask about them regularly because I care about my friends. For the ones that have pets, I fully expect that the pets are the centre of their worlds, and ask how they are doing regularly. In a fire, I would expect them to save their pets over my kids. Fortunately, they also understand the value of friendship, and ask about my pets and kids too.

Agree! I thought I would change when I had my own DC but I have not. I'm happy to say my old friendships are still intact as I keep boring kid talk to a minimum (and this doesn't mean I love them any less, some people on here seem to equate this with love and I'm not sure why).
Great user name BTW, I'm sure we'd be friends. I'll meet you after 8pm, I like white tablecloths and candles too 😁

Are all the hugely offended responders the ones who never shut up about their kids? I think you hit a nerve, OP.

I know what you mean, though, but I'd say it's the parents overdoing the subject that are the problem, rather than their offspring.

I appreciate they're just excited about their kids so I try to be patient. Well...its more talk about grandkids now I'm older!

I think people just need to remember that the only people who give a shit about a kid is their parents, and maybe the grandparents. That’s it.

It’s nothing to be offended about or something that should make you leap to your feet shouting “my 14 year is the wittiest person I know! He’s brilliant!” Only you think that. We don’t care.

Not necessarily. That's how some people feel but not everyone.

I like my friends children. Even before I had kids I was interested in them and liked hanging out with them.

I love this 🥔