Children are boring

[Bobbin35]

Very much following on from a thread on here about Greg James. It’s very true for me children are boring and I don’t want children. It’s very annoying that friends of mine insist I be interested in their child beyond asking how they are. If I started ensuring all my friends liked dogs, horses (that I own) I think I would lose friends very quickly but many of my friends assume I am their friend so therefore have to also be interested in their child. I’m not a bad friend I just don’t want to talk children at all just as I wouldn’t want to bore anyone I know about my horses if they are not horse people!

It sounds like they're not the only simple animals with no meaning.

That’s really all according to your own perspective though isn’t it.

I have a child, she’s my little gem and is everything to me, but someone else has a a pet they love and that pet means everything to them. I’ve got a pet who’s really unwell at the moment and it’s bothering me an awful lot - I don’t think of a him as a ‘simple animal with little to no meaning’. During the years we had fertility issues, he carried a lot of meaning and comfort.

Can we be friends I don't want anything to do with children and love animals

"Children are people yet they're dismissed all the time as if they aren't."

^this^

Children aren't a different species to adults. Having them maybe considered a lifestyle choice these days, but they are certainly not a hobby and having them is not comparable in anyway to owning a pet. One day they'll be adults, most of whom will be expected to support themselves and contributed to society. How are they ever meant to do that if they've been dismissed and devalued their entire childhood. Self esteem and self worth aren't delivered by flipping a magic switch at the age of 18. They have to be nurtured and developed throughout childhood. You can't suddenly go from being considered unworthy of attention and to being a fully functional member of society with good selfworth.

I'm not particularly interested in old people I'll never meet, but I don't zone out if a friend starts talking about her gran or whoever. You don't sound like a great friend.

I think there is a huge difference between being genuinely interested in every moment/milestone of your friends’ kids, which is probably unrealistic as yes, other people’s kids are boring and being interested in your friends lives, which necessarily involves their kids. Not so much that you’re interested in the finer details of the baby’s sleep schedule, but you care about how that effects your friend IYSWIM

Exactly. And every adult who finds children boring was a child once themselves. I wonder if their parents friends took an interest in them or just dismissed them as boring and irrelevant.
My parents friends were lovely to me and would always ask how I was getting on at school and what was going on in my life. I'm sure they didn't really care about Year 3 fancy dress day or how I could do my 7 times table, but it helped build a relationship with them that I still value as an adult.

miracle for the world !

😅 Thanks for the laugh, I needed that!

OP if you hang out on a site called Mumsnet to slag off the idea of having kids, you’ve got some pretty major psychological problems right there.

Nevertheless, a child is significantly different to a pet.

😂😂😂

It’s the parents that are boring, really.

I do care about my friends and their children, but some friends really don’t understand that caring doesn’t extend to wanting to know every mundane detail about their children.

I’m genuinely interested if child is getting on ok, if something major has happened. New school, just started walking, been unwell that sort of thing. But I don’t need to or want to know about every tiny detail. If you wouldn’t talk to that level of detail about yourself, then don’t talk to that level of detail about your child. I recently saw a friend who told me all about the various clubs her 2 year old was going to, to the level of they tried X Club and Y Place but it cost £5 whereas Z Club only costs £4 and it’s at 2:30pm which is a better time for her nap….. and so on and so on. This is boring. Lots of parents completely lose perspective and think friends want to know everything about the child.

I agree OP, it's not the kids themselves it's their lobotomised parents thinking everyone cares about the minutiae of their lives. Normal conversation dies until they get out of the new parent fog (some never do).

I don't find kids boring at all. I find lots of them funny, quirky and interested in things that adults take for granted. Some of them know how to push your buttons and some of them drive you to distraction. I do find what they want to talk about deeply boring, at times (Minecraft for daaaaays). But, as a group, I don't find them boring. Parents that have no other topic of conversation other than the minutiae of their child's lives? They're boring, all right.

😂 Tbeyre a different species. But if my friends want to talk about their pets, I’m happy to listen. They’re part of their lives.

All of this.

My mam's friends are still a part of my life. They came to my wedding, to my son's christening, bought him presents, he knows them if he passed them in the street. We send them birthday cards, I've been out with some of their daughters who have kids a similar age etc etc. Mam's friends are like aunties to me. My friends are aunties to my son.
I wouldn't be friends with someone who didn't see the worth in my child.

I've also gained interests through friends such as drawing. One of my best friends is really into art and sketching and she will show me her drawings and talk to me about art. I've learned loads and she's started teaching me how to sketch too. I'd never dismiss a part of her life because I care about her.

My child is the BEST company anyone could have.

You aren't a good friend if you show you are bored by something your friends are passionate about.

My friends all have things they are really invested in - I listen and get interested because I'm a good friend and it's important to them. That's what relationships are about

You do not sound like a good friend and why on are you on mumsnet???

I don’t talk about my children to my friends, occasionally to those that do have children though. It’s more of a ‘how’s the children/husband/partner/pets’, ‘oh all good thanks’, then we talk about something else.

I only have one close friend with a child and I can't stand to be around that child. I do have kids though and I'm quite fond of them although don't expect everyone to be.

Isn’t part of being a good friend listening to your mate when they talk about things that are really important to them, even if you’re not particularly interested in them?

There’s a limit of course but if you really hate hearing about your friends families, and that major part of their lives, maybe you should stop hanging out with them.

OP, do you ever talk about your job, your partner, your family? How would you feel if your friends said “actually I find you talking about your mum’s cancer scare really boring, I’m not really interested in your mum’s health. Can we go back to talking about Love Island?”

Friendships are about give and take, and you don’t sound like you are giving much.

I suppose it depends on your friendships. Our friends are often at our house with their kids, sometimes the kids close to our kids age stay over. We spend birthdays together, part of Xmas together, go away on holiday together with our partners, kids and dogs. When their kids were younger and off school ill they would often come to me as I was at home. Our lives are very involved with each other’s.

You’re right, pets are much more interesting and cute!