Children are boring

[Bobbin35]

Very much following on from a thread on here about Greg James. It’s very true for me children are boring and I don’t want children. It’s very annoying that friends of mine insist I be interested in their child beyond asking how they are. If I started ensuring all my friends liked dogs, horses (that I own) I think I would lose friends very quickly but many of my friends assume I am their friend so therefore have to also be interested in their child. I’m not a bad friend I just don’t want to talk children at all just as I wouldn’t want to bore anyone I know about my horses if they are not horse people!

They don't have to fawn over them at all.
It's just an inflammatory thread.
Imagine a thread about how old people are boring, people don't want to talk about them or be around them, can't stand them. They refuse to talk to their friends about their grandparents. It's just ridiculous.

Other people talking incessantly or moaning about their kids is mind numbingly boring for sure. I don't mind keeping up with what they are doing i.e. crawling, tummy time, walking, potty training, going to school, the works, but in VERY small doses and not repeated every time we meet up thanks.

It's as if some very intelligent people turn to kid flavoured jelly the minute they procreate and that can be a bit of a shock having known their pre kid personalities previously.

Obviously I don't have my own kids, never wanted them. But no one asks me about my lifestyle and what I am interested in. OK maybe in passing and then the eyes glaze over and it's back to the kids.

So I limit my friends to those of the same mindset as myself. Those with kids will be tolerated if they talk about anything other than kids.

I make sure I go on holidays and breaks in term time. I go to restaurants at a time when kids will be at school, never on a weekend unless it's after 8 pm and has white tablecloths and candles.

I am sure in the knowledge that I am not alone in thinking this way. Fess up now.

To be fair people who go on and on about their kids are very boring. But then so are people who want to show me their holiday photos, people who go on about their ex, people who are just dull in general and have no opinions, and people who have no social skills and let you make all the conversation. All are Dullsville.

YANBU

Kids are people. It’s weird when people say I don’t like kids or they’re boring. They’re not a homogenous group. They’re individual people with less life experience than adults…

Bizarre.

I mentioned at work today I was tired but had an evening of solo childcare ahead of me so needed some energy from somewhere. My colleague piped up bluntly ‘you chose to have kids so that’s what you’ve signed up for… then proceeded to bang on and on about her rabbit and his quirks.

I felt like being blunt back and saying IDGAF about your rabbit tbh. But instead I just listened politely 😳

I hate threads like this, because of course the implication is that children and their mothers are boring. Coming on MN with a bit of inflammatory mother hating and we have to pretend it’s fine because we respect your child free choices. Find an appropriate place on Reddit to make these points and let parents have their own space.

You have a cat that you love more than you could love a dog, because you don't like dogs. You don't know what you're talking about though because I have a dog AND a cat and i actually prefer the dog. Nonsense isn't it. Because I'm not interested in children. If I had one I would resent it. I wouldn't get any joy out of having one. Dogs? Love dogs. Don't resent them. Can't get enough of them.

No one is telling you how you feel about your dog and your child. But me? For me my dog is way more to me than a child ever could be. Because I don't want kids. I would hate having kids. We are different people with different feelings and priorities.

I wondered when someone would bring up the saving your child/dog from a burning building. I don’t think anyone who imagines these scenarios are in a healthy, happy place.

I do think some people are very patronising once they have children. It’s like they’ve discovered a superior level above those who don’t have children. Quite pathetic.

So you wouldn’t, would you?

I’m not being patronising, I’m simply telling the truth unless anybody on here wants to put up their hand and admit loving their dog more than their child..?

Children aren’t dogs or cats.

You’re being really silly and you know it.

And you didn’t say that you said ‘my dog means as much to me as your child does to you’.

Once you have kids they are the most exciting thing in the whole world.

I was never interested in kids but after having my own it was like a switch was flipped. When I see a sad child I can see my own child’s face in said sad child and I want to help them.

Although not interested in kids I never thought they were boring. Listening to people talk about them was boring but kids themselves generally aren’t. They have a lot of interesting / funny / creative things to say.

Yes i stand by that. I also don't think you understand how logic works.

I'm not being silly but I am fed up of you being deliberately obtuse. So I'm out.

Anyone that rabbits on about any one topic is boring. I would include diets, hobbies, kids, animals in that list!

I also don’t really enjoy having conversations with other people’s kids.

Are you serious? I couldn’t bear to think about it. The thought of a fire and my children or animals needing me, I can’t let my head go there. I don’t set up competitions in my head between who I’d save, who is more important, who would I pick to die between my kids, other peoples kids, my partner, dogs, cats like I’ve seen other people talk about on threads. It’s not a healthy headspace for anyone anc I think they’re ill to be honest to think like that.

My kids and animals are loved, as long as other people are loving and caring for their kids and animals, it’s not for me to measure that. I have a great group of friends and we’re all very interested in each other’s lives, kids, animals, work, everything. I don’t have a hierarchy of friends either. Crazy. 😂

I don’t really understand the mentality or intended purpose of starting a thread stating that ‘children are boring’. Particularly on a forum which is largely focused on parenting (and yes I know there are many other topics and am not suggesting for a moment that only parents should be on here).

I fully agree that anyone banging on about their kids or expecting others to be as enamoured with them as they are is very annoying. I don’t expect my childless / child free friends to be particularly interested in the ins and outs of my children’s lives. But when you’re friends with someone, the various parts of their life are surely part and parcel of that relationship. Just as I happily chat to my friends about their hobbies, families, work etc even if it’s not of massive interest to me.

I completely understand and respect that lots of women don’t want kids. But it just seems very mean-spirited and inflammatory to declare all children boring and suggest that anyone daring to mention their kids is insufferable or, by association, also boring. I agree with a PP that a minority of child free women are quite militant about their hatred of children- fine you don’t like kids but there’s no need to labour the point 🙄

I don’t like horses, but it wouldn’t occur to me to start a thread saying ‘horses are boring’. I might think it, but creating a thread about it (particularly on a site where horses were a big focus) would seem a tad spiteful to me.

Particularly strange to list all the choices that involve avoiding children- term time holidays, dinners only at 8pm in restaurants with candles- it reads as a guide to child avoidance for those who have anxiety around children but oddly directed at the 'Mumsnet' audience!

I have a 15 and 11 year old, they are funny and smart, certainly much better company than many witless adults I come across!

I know someone who does not stop talking about and babying their dog, I never see the dog walking, it is always being held, I have expect to see a bonnet on it the next time I see it!

Oh please, you’re just deflecting the question because it makes my position quite clear.

😂

Meh, having worked with kids for years I’d argue very strong that kids are actually bloody good fun! I left my role recently and now work with adults - I won’t tell you who I find more boring (but it’s definitely not the kids 😂).
My own kids are also really fun. More fun than horses - imo!

Very STRONGLY! Shouldn’t type without my glasses as this time of day…

I agree with you. And I love kids, but I totally hear you. I don't talk about mine unless asked, I don't feel why it needs to consume a conversation. Also hate people taking about their pets. Really don't care. So much more to talk about.

@bumblenbean its all a bit ‘the lady doth protest too much’. I know plenty of child free people who are happy to hear about their friend’s kids (in healthy moderate doses of course), and interested in what they’ve been up to. I didn’t want children up until a few months before I got preg with my daughter, but I liked receiving the odd video of my best friend’s little son - it was joyous seeing her transform into a lovely mum as well.

I think if you’re very happy and comfortable with your choices then there is really no need to make sure everyone knows just how boring you find their lives.

Like what?

Current events, work issues, DH being a pain, going on holiday, what happened in the weekend, family drama etc, etc.

I'm a recent-ish mum, but even now I don't talk about my kid much and neither do my friends. Unless there's something going on like an issue or a milestone like starting school or something. But honestly, it just doesn't enter into the conversation, never has.
We barely have enough time when we catch up anyway.
I'm with you OP. Don't want to hear it!