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Original poster

Would you choose Doctor Assisted Suicide for yourself?

276 replies

MooseBreath · 23/01/2023 11:23

Hypothetically, would you wish to sign a waiver in early stages of dementia or an illness that would one day severely reduce cognitive function? Or what circumstances would you want Doctor Assisted Suicide, if any?

I was thinking about it and I would. I don't want to live in a world without recognising my loved ones or where I cannot remember to do basic things like go to the toilet, wash myself, or eat. At that stage, for me, quality of life would be too far gone.

Maybe signing early on with very clear boundaries on what I was able to do and understand. Kind of like in the book "Still Alice".

Inspired by the thread on euthanasia and MAiD. Not here to start a bunfight, not here to discuss whether or not euthanasia should be legal, not here to discuss the ramifications of MAiD.

Interested to hear people's thoughts on the matter, purely about themselves.

OP posts:
BigMandsTattooPortfolio · 23/01/2023 17:54

My mum doesn’t have dementia, but has some memory loss. It’s seeing this woman reduced to a shadow, her vibrancy and love of life gone. Not to mention the pain of her body and that she gets distressed and wants to slip away. It just totally perplexes me as to why we insist on keeping extremely elderly, frail and suffering people alive, long after their vitality and quality of life has gone.

BlueSuffragette · 23/01/2023 17:55

Yes, 100% would do this.

70Cats · 23/01/2023 17:57

Yes. Where do I sign up!

Idratherbepaddleboarding · 23/01/2023 17:58

100% yes, if I could sign a disclaimer now I would. At the point that I need to go into a nursing home, I want to be able to die gracefully. I don’t want to exist in a nursing home, I don’t want to be a burden on society and I don’t want to use up all of DS’s inheritance in care home fees.

icanwearwhatiwant · 23/01/2023 18:05

100% I would, as long as there were a very tightly controlled set of criteria that multiple objective parties had to agree on.
If an animal gets to the point where they have little or no quality of life, they are kindly helped to end their life. I would like the same.

Bigweekend · 23/01/2023 18:06

I don't think you can possibly say whilst in rude health, you're taking about some hypothetical future and can't know how you'd feel.

My DH was very ill for the last 12 months of his life. Completely bedbound and in a lot of pain for the last 6. He wasn't ready to die though. Things like watching TV with his kids were still worth living for. As a young, fit man, he'd have said he'd rather die than live like that.

Masterofcats · 23/01/2023 18:09

yes I absolutely do not wanty children having to clean up my shit when I have dementia and don't even know them.
My dad asked for help when he was dying of cancer ( obviously nobody helped him die) honestly it was awful for him.
When life quality gos I would rather step out with dignity having told my loves ones I loved them and wish them happiness going forward. I also feel it my help bereavement if the nasty bits don't happen with death.

lemmein · 23/01/2023 18:09

I once went to a home for people with advanced dementia and without meaning to be crass, it was like being on the set of the walking dead. I found it really disturbing - I particularly remember one elderly lady walking the corridors crying looking for her baby Sad so upsetting. The staff said she did it all day long - I can't imagine how horrific it is to be stuck in that state of distress for the rest of my days. It's humane how we treat people.

I think people should be able to choose assisted suicide for any reason though - not necessarily 'just' for terminal illnesses/dementia.

antipodeancanary · 23/01/2023 18:09

Yes definitely. And the fact that some people don't want to is no reason to prevent me from having the opportunity. My body, my choice.

HallwayDoor · 23/01/2023 18:10

100% yes

Andante57 · 23/01/2023 18:11

My whole family have been told to top me off if I end up with it.

Sure, but they almost certainly won’t do that as they’ll be had up for murder or manslaughter. That’s why individuals should have the right to decide for themselves - and in advance in the case of dementia.

lemmein · 23/01/2023 18:14

lemmein · 23/01/2023 18:09

I once went to a home for people with advanced dementia and without meaning to be crass, it was like being on the set of the walking dead. I found it really disturbing - I particularly remember one elderly lady walking the corridors crying looking for her baby Sad so upsetting. The staff said she did it all day long - I can't imagine how horrific it is to be stuck in that state of distress for the rest of my days. It's humane how we treat people.

I think people should be able to choose assisted suicide for any reason though - not necessarily 'just' for terminal illnesses/dementia.

*inhumane

2023bebetter · 23/01/2023 18:19

Yes.

I've sat next to slowly dying relatives, having to watch them struggle and die and no a driver of pain stuff isn't humane.

I've also worked in a nursing home and seen the struggles of abandoned elderly folk.

It's awful and they're so incredibly vulnerable.

I'd like to get something on place that if I can't live at home and I don't know my loved ones and nees help with basic toileting then is like to go. .same with any terminal illness I want to go before I'm starved and dehydrated to death.

Lessstressedhemum · 23/01/2023 18:20

Absolutely, yes I would. I've already told my kids that, if I get dementia or anything that would mean I was a burden to them and was losing myself , I want to go to Dignitas and die with a bit of dignity and self respect.

2023bebetter · 23/01/2023 18:20

People who object should do a stint In various homes and wards.

It's beyond inhumane.

Iwantabloodypizza · 23/01/2023 18:21

Andante57 · 23/01/2023 18:11

My whole family have been told to top me off if I end up with it.

Sure, but they almost certainly won’t do that as they’ll be had up for murder or manslaughter. That’s why individuals should have the right to decide for themselves - and in advance in the case of dementia.

The only reason I haven’t ended my fathers suffering with dementia is my children.

They would suffer when I went to prison. I wouldn’t care if I didn’t have them. I would take this all away from him and take the punishment. the last two years dealing with him, social care, the care home, everyone just caring about his money really and not him has affected me so deeply and changed me, I don’t think I will ever be the same again.

I pray every day that he will have a heart attack and die. He’s confused and upset everyday, living in a place that he hates. He’s waiting to die a horrible death.

2023bebetter · 23/01/2023 18:21

No one's children can do anything without a change in the law

ArseInTheDogBowl · 23/01/2023 18:23

@Iwantabloodypizza I'm so sorry 💐 it's horrific.

Iwantabloodypizza · 23/01/2023 18:23

lemmein · 23/01/2023 18:09

I once went to a home for people with advanced dementia and without meaning to be crass, it was like being on the set of the walking dead. I found it really disturbing - I particularly remember one elderly lady walking the corridors crying looking for her baby Sad so upsetting. The staff said she did it all day long - I can't imagine how horrific it is to be stuck in that state of distress for the rest of my days. It's humane how we treat people.

I think people should be able to choose assisted suicide for any reason though - not necessarily 'just' for terminal illnesses/dementia.

My dad screams for me.

He thinks I am a toddler and he’s lost me. He gets so distressed, even when I am there. He relives my mum dying too, even though it was 30 years ago. He sits by his bed, sobbing like he did next to her hospital bed.

He cries for his parents sometimes too.

I can’t bear it.

2023bebetter · 23/01/2023 18:23

I want pizza unfortunately it's something people only realise about when it happens to them or a loved one.

How can we call ourselves civilised and do this to people.

There was a petition on assisted dying I think it's been moved to petitions but worth signing m

It's something that makes me feel extremely cross

2023bebetter · 23/01/2023 18:25

I want ,I am sure you never would but imagine if people could see this agony he is going though?

Imagine if the " dignity of life" sanctity of life religious crowd could see your poor father in this state.

whitesnowflake · 23/01/2023 18:26

@BensonStabler Such a powerful post, my heart goes out to you and your family Flowers

anonymousMuse · 23/01/2023 18:27

Absolutely and I'd be eternally grateful to the person selfless enough to do it for me.

Thesonglastslonger · 23/01/2023 18:31

Not sure, re being a cabbage.

I’m more scared of chronic pain. I had a brief experience with significant pain that is not always curable, fortunately mine is now gone, but I had already decided I would not be able to live with it for years.

annonymousse · 23/01/2023 18:39

Hell yes. My parents are both suffering slow lingering deaths. I don't want that for myself but also don't want my children to go through what myself and siblings are currently enduring.

However it needs to be watertight. My mum would choose it now if it were available but dad would not and prefers to let nature take its course

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