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Original poster

Would you choose Doctor Assisted Suicide for yourself?

276 replies

MooseBreath · 23/01/2023 11:23

Hypothetically, would you wish to sign a waiver in early stages of dementia or an illness that would one day severely reduce cognitive function? Or what circumstances would you want Doctor Assisted Suicide, if any?

I was thinking about it and I would. I don't want to live in a world without recognising my loved ones or where I cannot remember to do basic things like go to the toilet, wash myself, or eat. At that stage, for me, quality of life would be too far gone.

Maybe signing early on with very clear boundaries on what I was able to do and understand. Kind of like in the book "Still Alice".

Inspired by the thread on euthanasia and MAiD. Not here to start a bunfight, not here to discuss whether or not euthanasia should be legal, not here to discuss the ramifications of MAiD.

Interested to hear people's thoughts on the matter, purely about themselves.

OP posts:
mildlydispeptic · 23/01/2023 16:10

Absolutely

ilovesooty · 23/01/2023 16:11

Clariana · 23/01/2023 11:40

Yes absolutely. The sooner it is legal the better.

Agreed.

Backstreetsbackalrightdadada · 23/01/2023 16:13

Absolutely. Seen several people die. In those cases, it was more that very slowly and without dignity the things that made them and kept them alive just disintegrated until they literally couldn’t stay alive any longer. It wasn’t like “death happened”, more like slow torture. Absolutely horrible and inhumane, even with pain relief

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 23/01/2023 16:13

Yes in theory. But. I do not trust people.
I can easily see a case where 'loved' ones pressure someone into signing in order to get their inheritance or forging signatures etc.
And any time this happens is one time too many.

Also, once you are so far in, when/how can you change your mind?

I do not want to be a burden on my family when I'm older and (would like to think I) will do what I need to. But, I wouldn't want that decision made for me or before I'm ready.

Bingbongy · 23/01/2023 16:14

Absolutely 100% believe in this.

I challenge anyone to read this report and not agree.

warning: link is not for the sensitive as has descriptions of dying which are reality and not like the movies…

www.dignityindying.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/DiD_Inescapable_Truth_WEB.pdf

Suzi888 · 23/01/2023 16:14

Yes. It needs to happen.

BucketofTeaMassiveCake · 23/01/2023 16:17

Yes I would, we put animals to sleep if we believe that they're suffering. I'd put my affairs in order first and try to think about it very calmly. It's a very sad state of affairs but I don't believe that people should suffer unnecessarily.

TeaMistress · 23/01/2023 16:17

Yes. It is unimaginably painful and heartbreaking to watch someone you love go from being well and active and with full mental capacity be reduced to lying in a bed doubly incontinent waiting to die slowly and painfully while not recognising their family anymore. Disease and delirium are utterly horrifying to watch as they strip away any remnants of the person you love. I would want to spare myself from the appalling and undignified agony of dying like this and spare my loved ones having to watch me die like this. A real conversation about this in society is long overdue.

ManyNameChanges · 23/01/2023 16:34

Hmm…. Not convinced about it tbh.
you should be able to change your mind at any time because what feels ok on one day of early dementia stage might not feel ok at all on another day.
Then add the difficulty of defining what is ‘early stage of dementia’ and when they are stable to take decisions fir themselves or not…
i think it would create A LOT of heartache fir the person and their family.

i also think that a lot if people saying yes now might well say NO!!! when it will get real and they have to face their death. Esp if they feel ‘it’s too early’ and their struggles are not that bad.

biedrona · 23/01/2023 16:44

YES

ArseInTheDogBowl · 23/01/2023 16:44

ManyNameChanges · 23/01/2023 16:34

Hmm…. Not convinced about it tbh.
you should be able to change your mind at any time because what feels ok on one day of early dementia stage might not feel ok at all on another day.
Then add the difficulty of defining what is ‘early stage of dementia’ and when they are stable to take decisions fir themselves or not…
i think it would create A LOT of heartache fir the person and their family.

i also think that a lot if people saying yes now might well say NO!!! when it will get real and they have to face their death. Esp if they feel ‘it’s too early’ and their struggles are not that bad.

But it's not just about dementia. Yes it can be difficult with dementia, even with advanced directives. Although it's still what I'd want for myself.

Of my grandparents, none of them had dementia. Three of them suffered a lot in the years/months leading to their deaths. Two of them had full mental capacity. The third had delirium brought on by a hospital stay after a horrible, horrible accident.

So two of them without doubt would have had capacity to make their own decisions.

PassAnotherJumper · 23/01/2023 16:51

Yes. With enough forethought and someone to talk me through quality of life and the options, so I could choose when was 'enough' for me. I think it would be a great comfort to know I was going to die peacefully and comfortable in a bed. Instead of in pain and fear and (possibly) all alone.

ManyNameChanges · 23/01/2023 16:56

@ArseInTheDogBowl im not saying I’m against assisted suicide as such.
Im sure there are situations where it’s the right choice for the person - that’s where system like MAID can be helpful.

But an advance decisions, which is eg at the OP is talking about needs to be one that can be reviewed and cancelled if the person wants to.

I mean I’m in the process of setting up a living will and getting a DNR in place.
So it’s the sort if things I’ve thought about quite a bit.
And I’m acutely aware that when it comes to take the final decision, esp if you are in less than peaceful circumstances like the ones you describe, you might well take a different stance.

ManyNameChanges · 23/01/2023 16:57

Btw it’s the OP that talked about dementia is loss if cognitive function…

ArseInTheDogBowl · 23/01/2023 17:01

ManyNameChanges · 23/01/2023 16:57

Btw it’s the OP that talked about dementia is loss if cognitive function…

Fair enough but the discussion amongst many PPs expanded to talk about in other situations.

I've given it all a lot of thought myself too having seen what my family went through anyway. And I'm pretty resolute in wanting it. I never thought I'd have given it so much thought in my 30s tbh but it was horrifying.

Original poster
MooseBreath · 23/01/2023 17:05

Just clarifying that I meant to encompass more than just dementia, which is why I mentioned loss of cognitive function.

OP posts:
PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 23/01/2023 17:06

Yes, I would love to have this option when the time is right.

britneybitch23 · 23/01/2023 17:10

After seeing my great grandmother and her sister decline from the age of about 10 alllllll the way through to my early 30's.. fuck yeah. My whole family have been told to top me off if I end up with it.

Paternal side have avoided it and are physically and mentally fit in their 80s so I'm hopeful

Clingfilm · 23/01/2023 17:16

Yes. Definitely.

NoSquirrels · 23/01/2023 17:18

Yes, I would choose this with no hesitation in the circumstances you describe, OP.

AccidentallyRunToWindsor · 23/01/2023 17:20

Yes. My mother is living in a condition you would be prosecuted for keeping a cat or dog living in. Zero quality of life. I do not want DP to watch me go through that.

mortifying · 23/01/2023 17:35

There is currently an inquiry (mentioned at the bottom of the link here - the petition on the link closed last year ). We were given until the end of Friday to respond. petition.parliament.uk/petitions/604383

I wonder what the timescale is for the inquiry. A referendum was mentioned and I said in my response that I thought we ought to have one on the subject.

marmaladepop · 23/01/2023 17:35

100% yes. Currently watching my father in his 6th year of dementia. It's horrific and I've been quite traumatised by it and the effect it has on the whole family, not just him.

SomethingOnce · 23/01/2023 17:43

I don’t want to end up like this, but most of all I don’t want my DC to have to oversee this kind of decline, especially if they have DC, my DGC, of their own.

UsingChangeofName · 23/01/2023 17:50

Yes, I absolutely would, and am a supporter of Dying with Dignity.

How anyone can read @BensonStabler 's moving post - and so many hundreds of other family stories - and insist she goes through what her family members went through, and that her dc go through watching her go through that I cannot understand.
Same with the young man in America that started the ice-bucket challenge to raise funds for research into ALS / MND a few years ago. If people know what is going to happen, how cruel is society to say "you have to go through that" rather than saying "when the time comes you can choose to die peacefully when you are ready".