Has a man dressed as a woman ever come into a communal changing room with you or joined a specifically female group you belong to ?

[Rilkescat]

How common is it ? Not really referring to stories in the media but for everyday women on MN. FWIW I've never met a trans person that I know of, neither professionally or socially. I'm a HCP so meet alot of members of the public. None of my kids have friends that are trans nor do my friends have children that are either.
Loads of trans threads at the moment. No problem with that but just wondered if it really is that prevalent ?
Before I get flamed I'm not in favour of biological womens' safe spaces being open to biological men but equally I don't think that all trans people, especially trans women are necessarily sexually deviant or mentally ill.

Yes at work. We've had 2 male to female members of staff. Both used our 1 womens cubicle we had available.

Yes to both.
Women's toilets at cinema ( I was with my teenage daughter at time- she also says she has been in Primark with her pals when a male came into changing room when they were about to try stuff on . They no longer do that). Also a self Id ing trans woman joined the political Woman's group I was in ( you could tell a mile off that this person was male as have never met any other women of any Party who door knock in 4 inch high heels 😂). I left quite soon after as felt it was compromised and did not align to my values any more regarding centring disadvantaged women in politics.

I know quite a few F2M trans people. Often they are quite sensitive and compassionate men but nothing remarkable that would cause anyone any discomfort.

Yes, local leisure centre near me. Last 3 months. There has been an ongoing issue with a trans identifying male (I don't know if they identify as a woman or a transwoman, there has been some suggestion they don't consistently) using women's communal changing room but also behaving strangely - watching, exposing, walking around naked etc. Dozens have complained and leisure centre staff have been apologising saying they can't do anything. (There is more detail of course.) Its also a space used by preteen and teen girls. I'm aware of the political and media debates but it really brought things. I think women and men who know have found it shocking that a road to male exposure in the ladies changing room has been created and there is no recourse for dealing with it. It has gone on for months. I think they would have gone unnoticed if he had used a cubicle but clearly that wasn't what he was interested in.

Yes. Over 20 years ago, when the Youth Hostels' Association still had only single sex dormitories. I went to a rural youth hostel for a weekend away. There was another what I assumed was a single woman in the small hostel. It never occurred to me that they were trans - which was very unusual in those days. I spent the evening in the communal room and went to the dormitory at around 11 or 12. The other "woman" was in bed (bunk beds) with the light off, and no-one else in the room. I turned the light on to quickly get changed for bed. I was in the middle of changing into a nightdress when the "woman" leapt out of bed, expressed anger that I had turned the light on and punched me on the arm. It was a shockingly powerful punch, which left a big bruise. The "woman" then grabbed all my belongings and hurled them out into the corridor. I had to go and find the hostel manager in their private rooms and they put me in another room. The person had breached the YHA policy at the time, which I was told was that transpeople were put in a one person room. They had pretended to be a woman. They were banned from the YHA (all of it, not just that hostel).
The really weird part is that the next weekend I went to another hostel for the Saturday night (this nice part of the country wasn't too far from where I lived). On arrival, I went into the women's dormitory, and the same transwoman was there. I reported them to the police. The police told me that the transwoman was on a cycling holiday around the area, and that their bicycle panier contained a number of unwashed sex toys. The transwoman had also been reported to have sexually harrassed a girl in a women's public toilet, by exposing themselves to her.
It's a bizarre story, but all true. I've obviously name-changed for this one.

Just to say I don't think at all that this issue is created by every trans person. But there is certainly some sort of loophole now for some men to enter the female facilities.

And I’m sure that being sensitive and compassionate they wouldn’t dream of forcing themselves as men into female spaces and making women feel uncomfortable or worse. Decent men (in whatever form they present to the world) don’t, but unfortunately many of the men described on here are not so sensitive and compassionate.

TERF - tired of explaining reality to fuckwits

Im astonished at the number of ppl unable to tell a man from a woman if he puts on a dress and has long hair

My comment bagelbagelbagel’s post was the perfect example of ‘answering’ a different question from the one OP asked. Different and completely irrelevant. Invite anyone you like into your house. Do not invite males to invade women’s privacy.

above was meant to quote this.

But they can do something about this. Transwomen don't currently have the right to enter women's single sex spaces. They only do so because they're given permission to do so. Even if they did have this right, someone (male or female) who is deliberately harassing other users could be excluded from the changing room / premises. The manager needs to get some proper legal advice and to take action.

Exactly, of course we can bloody tell.
When everyone had to wear masks we could still tell what a man looked like.

Haven't read the full thread.

I read someone on this site refer to transgenderism as 'social contagion'.

I always replace 'transgender' as 'homosexual' when I read peoples comments.

Try it.

Yea to both. A male teacher in the women’s staff loo. Supply teacher. I told him it was the women’s and he just shrugged. New he’d be supported. Dressed typically male. I’m in Canada.

I work with one young woman who’s on hormones, but no mastectomy as yet. Wants us to use he/him etc but although a big-boned woman is clearly female. I also, because of my former job, know loads of kids, only two are natal males, who are presenting as trans or non-binary. With the exception of the 2 boys, all are autistic girls who are sometimes also clearly young lesbians. It’s quite upsetting to see the cultural and internalized homophobia in action that is convincing young lesbians that they are “born in the wrong body”.

No thanks 👍

Agree, for the sake of balance. I wanted to comment. But there are clearly other stories. I hope the bad stories are rare but still a problem when it happens.

The people I know started life as women. They have had a lifetime as women in female spaces. During transition, they might still go to female spaces. And start to go in to more male spaces.

From speaking to my partner, male spaces seem to be more hostile. So I would be more concerned about these people entering in to an unwelcoming space than continuing to use female areas whilst transitioning

Yes! My young daughter had nipped to the loo in large cash and carry while i was queuing to pay, when I saw a lad of about 25 ish striding confidently towards the ladies in what we would call feminine clothes but not what a women would ever shop in (very short skirt, fishnets and very very high heals....) ive never moved so fast, they were probably completely safe but my parental instincts would not let me take that chance!

Gosh. How are you an 'out' bisexual in changing rooms? As a fellow bisexual woman, the mind boggles!

I was very much #bekind until I found a transwoman in a public toilet taking selfies by the sanitary bin. I have seen several Transwomen lately and none of them pass.

tenor.com/view/shakira-dancing-dance-shakira-whenever-wherever-whenever-wherever-gif-17523324

Why?

Being attracted to someone of the same sex doesn't impact on anyone else's rights. Stating men are women does.

Mind boggling that you conflate the two but here we are.

Why did you post the gif of Shakira?

As far as I know, "a man dressed as a tenant" has never shared a sex based space with me. But plenty of trans women (and trans men for that matter) have, I have quite a few trans friends and we've shared bathrooms and changing rooms.

Total quote failure - ignore tenant, should read "woman"!

Gaargh! That never works for me