Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

DRY JANUARY 2023! Been overindulging? Drinking crept up? Want to begin a healthy new you? This way please. All welcome!

992 replies

HPLikecraft · 28/12/2022 20:17

It’s that time of year again... the late Christmas present to our livers!
You may be thinking of doing Dry January to:

*detox a little after seasonal overindulgence, or
*help you cut down a bit generally, or
*help you start to get out of a harmful alcohol habit, or
*just be a bit healthier for a month...

It’s good for all of those things!

I find the MN DJ threads excellent for support, encouragement, sharing info, ‘we’re in this together’ camaraderie, suggestions for grown up drinks, aversion techniques and just fun.

This is my sixth year of DJ and I swear it may have saved my life; it was so hard first time, but having succeeded I did dry June and October after that, and do so most years. It has broken my habit, banished much of the craving and reset my relationship with booze. I imagine it's added years to my life.

I won’t be finding DJ too difficult this year, but some will. Hopefully this thread will help.

Throw your hat in the ring, pull up a chair and let's do this together. Everyone welcome 🙂☕️🧃

The DJ2022 Wagon creaks to a start in just 4 days, but always stops for latecomers 🙂

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Stickywhitelovepiss · 01/01/2023 20:33

I can't knit, but do find the Happy Color 'colouring in' app a way to keep the hands busy. Also Jigsaw apps, Solitaire, Minesweeper, etc. - but there is something particularly satisfying / relaxing about the Happy Color one!

@pointythings really nice to see you on here too - you were such a huge help across my two other long-standing threads. Sad to say ex-DH is in a bad a place as ever, and me leaving was not even close to whatever rock bottom he still needs to hit, but no longer my problem. As for me, I'm feeling happier, calmer and more content than have been in years, like a weight has been lifted. Ditched smoking completely 3 months ago and have taken up swimming, recently completed Couch to 5km, plus have travelled widely / seen friends all around the world - all since working up the courage to pull the plug on that relationship at the start of the year.

DJ is the final part of that puzzle for me in emerging 'whole' again from the trauma that was that relationship by the end. I was never even on the same scale of drinking as he was (that would have literally killed me), but at the same time it's all a spectrum and my own sense of 'normal' from 14 years with an alcoholic has probably ended up a bit warped as a result. I'm acutely aware not to go down that road - and am absolutely not going to. Started incorporating more alcohol free days towards the end of last week, and it's actually been really empowering / reassuring that it's not been as hard as I feared (which was actually proving a 'mental block' for me for some time...). A whole month is an entirely different order of magnitude entirely, but at the moment feeling really positive about it. Sometimes it's just time for change, and maybe that time for me is now.

Mezmer · 01/01/2023 20:37

freshstart2023 · 01/01/2023 20:22

Sorry, one more post: I've been reflecting on my behaviour when I've been drinking. DH and I had two or three big rows last year after consuming a few too many drinks and I know the DC heard us shouting. I'm so ashamed and disgusted with myself, I know it wouldn't have happened if I hadn't drunk too much. It's unforgivable, I love the DC to bits, they deserve better and I can't stop beating myself up about it.

This was me about ten years ago. Pissed up arguments that ruined Christmas and the reason why I had to address it. The arguing stopped when my drinking stopped funnily enough. I just learnt to deal with family differences in a more measured way.

Stickywhitelovepiss · 01/01/2023 20:38

@freshstart2023 we crossed posted on a similar theme, but the key difference between my ex-DH's story and yours is that you're not in denial - you are acknowledging a problem forming and are on here starting to tackle it with the rest of us, before it runs away with you. That's a massive achievement, in and off itself - big unMNy hug to you just for that.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Spirini · 01/01/2023 20:40

Sitting on the sofa in the evenings when the kids have gone to bed is my trigger, so right now is the danger zone for me. I think I'll have a slice of cake...still so much crap in my house

ColouringPencils · 01/01/2023 20:41

Hello, can I join? I think this is my 4th year, and definitely been drinking too much recently. Having done it before, I know it will be manageable, but I have still had to take myself to bed at 8pm as I couldn't think what else to do with myself. I have been away, so am not really prepared, but will go tomorrow to get some AF beers. I also like herbal tea and diet coke, but after the first couple of weeks will probably be okay with just water.

@freshstart2023 sorry to hear you are beating yourself up. I am sure most of us on this thread can sympathise more than we'd like to - I certainly can. Just remember you are here now and you are doing your best to tackle it, one step at a time💐

I don't know if anyone saw the Netflix documentary Stutz, about Jonah Hill and his therapist? I found it useful in lots of ways, but there is a particular line that I keep remembering. It's something like: 'Schmuck, take action, no matter how frightened you are.'

GhostCastle · 01/01/2023 20:41

I’m in. Thanks for the thread @HPLikecraft. I quit drinking for over a year a couple of years ago. I started again because I felt like a party pooper on nights out. I find it hard to socialise if I’m sober and everyone else is drinking. It took me ages to enjoy drinking again. Alcoholic drinks I used to love tasted gross. So silly starting up again. I loved having increased energy levels and losing weight. Not going to commit to quitting for a year at the moment. I’m feeling a bit twitchy and irritable, but that’s probably because I’ve eaten a load of cheese and sweets. Not a great combination.🤦‍♀️

ColouringPencils · 01/01/2023 20:52

I've got 'big plans' for January which involve eating more healthily, walking more, going to the gym more often, having a good bedtime routine and reading more books. Maybe applying for a job too. It is quite sad that I feel excited about this!

tothefareast80 · 01/01/2023 21:09

I'm in. Starting tomorrow as on our last night of holidays today but definitely need a reset for health and sleep reasons. I am also feeling rather too reliant on a glass of wine or two at the end of a busy day and want to kick that habit. Glad to have found a support thread

Newyearnewme23 · 01/01/2023 21:41

Hello. Day 1 done. Safely past dinner prep. On to day 2.

pointythings · 01/01/2023 21:45

@Stickywhitelovepiss huge sympathy to you. It's awful watching them self destruct. You know where to find me if you need to talk/if he gets worse.

Your reasons for DJ are very like mine - it's part of becoming a whole new person. And yes, it's a better one.

Stickywhitelovepiss · 01/01/2023 21:53

pointythings · 01/01/2023 21:45

@Stickywhitelovepiss huge sympathy to you. It's awful watching them self destruct. You know where to find me if you need to talk/if he gets worse.

Your reasons for DJ are very like mine - it's part of becoming a whole new person. And yes, it's a better one.

Thanks @pointythings - it took many months, but I am genuinely accepting that it is no longer my problem, and I no longer have to stand by and watch. Have seen him maybe twice in the last few months, and that was in passing as he's cleared his stuff from the garage. Saying 'out of sight, out of mind' would be putting it way too tritely, but I'm no longer at close quarters - and so, so much happier for it. The times I have seen him, he looks and sounds like complete shit - am not tempted back in the slightest. In such a better place without him.

buzzofthebumblebee · 01/01/2023 22:13

I'm in too. Late to the thread, but take much comfort from knowing I'm not doing this on my own. I've done DJ a good few times (was in the original penguin huddle) but still back for more, as I just love a drink.

I'm quitting sugar for Jan too - so expect the headache to kick in tomorrow. But really looking forward to proper sleep, less body bloat, less anxiety, and being more in control of myself.

Camomile tea in hand, and kindle loaded up for night time insomnia until I drop off to sleep naturally without alcohol.

Day 1 done! 30 to go. Thanks to OP for thread and everyone else for support.

lipstickwoman · 01/01/2023 22:21

In bed without having had a drink for about a month.

Feeling determined

Namechange1990 · 01/01/2023 22:32

Can I join please.... Dry January is kind of first step of plan of total life change here following a crap year. Final straw was when I realised i couldn't remember the last time I didn't drink at least a bottle of wine.

Today was day one and weirdly cos im determined it didn't bother me at all. Although went to shop today and was moaning at the price of lime and mint drink.... £3 yet n3ver had an issue spending £20 a day on wine madness really.

FlyingPandas · 01/01/2023 22:46

I'd like to join too please...

Have done DJ in the past and have felt a lot better for it. I drink a bit too much wine too often, is probably the best way of summing up my drinking habits. I'm never really drunk or out of control, I never have drink-fuelled arguments or anything like that, I just find it all too easy to fall into a pattern of drinking wine a lot more regularly than is sensible and I look forward to it a bit too eagerly than is probably healthy. It's all about a glass as a reward at the end of a tough day, a glass to celebrate a good day, a glass to help when I'm feeling stressed or down or anxious or worried, a glass to enjoy when catching up with friends, a glass with DH whilst watching TV. And then it's just all too easy for one glass to lead to another and another, especially over the Christmas period.

Am looking forward to re-setting the pattern of my evenings but apprehensive about it too.

Spirini · 01/01/2023 23:20

I'm also in bed having conquered Day 1. It was a true test as we were in a friends house for dinner and others were drinking, then home to a house with a couple of bottles of wine in it.

I'm literally going to put them under lock and key.

Stickywhitelovepiss · 01/01/2023 23:25

I'm in bed but can't sleep - my fault really as could have turned the telly off much sooner (being booze free, you get through SO much tv!).

This is may main problem on alcohol free nights - people say you sleep better, but it's quite the opposite in my case. Even when I get to sleep, I don't sleep well - according to my Fitbit at least. Ho hum. Well done all and check in tomorrow!

FlairBand · 02/01/2023 00:05

Well done everyone, I’m also lying wide awake and I need to reset my relationship with my phone as much as my wine!

not sure I’m ready for that, but at taking things a day at a time so maybe tomorrow is the night that I go to sleep with my phone outside the room!

Els1e · 02/01/2023 00:20

Got through this evening without alcohol. Kept busy and faffed about. Now having trouble getting to sleep. Think I might have a cold coming on. Or is it withdrawal symptoms?

WheelofLife · 02/01/2023 06:45

I’m in Australia. This is the witching hour on Day 1 for me. I have a mug of lemon and ginger herbal tea, and ginger cordial for later. Feeling a little tense so may go to bed early with a book till I get into the swing of it. My partner drinks every night which makes it a bit more difficult…..

flowerycurtain · 02/01/2023 07:30

Morning all. Well done everyone for a good first day. I have woken up for the first time in 7 days without a drink and I feel so much better!! Clear headed and ready for the day.

DoingALeicester · 02/01/2023 07:43

Wow @Spirini that's impressive!

Haruka · 02/01/2023 07:45

This is may main problem on alcohol free nights - people say you sleep better, but it's quite the opposite in my case. Even when I get to sleep, I don't sleep well - according to my Fitbit at least. Ho hum. Well done all and check in tomorrow!

I found this last night. I am actually disappointed as everywhere I read says you get much better - and better quality - sleep when you don't drink and yet I woke at least 3 times during the night and I am fully aware that these were only "big" wakes and I had a few smaller ones along the way. But here's to hoping that was just my body going wtf at no alcohol last night.

Am up earlyish to do work; it looks like I have a full day of that ahead of me, so no time to waste before the real deal starts again tomorrow. Sigh, the beauty of my job, I worked a 3-4 hours every day before Christmas since we broke up and I'm still not done.

millypeggyandpandora · 02/01/2023 08:21

Yep, infrequent, light sleep here too 😞 I am hoping that improves as the month continues. I am going to do some evening yoga and drink Ovaltine tonight see if that helps

Fuwari · 02/01/2023 08:23

I also don’t sleep when I don’t drink, or drink less than my normal amount. It’s probably the toughest part for me as my sleep isn’t great to begin with (peri menopausal). And then lying there awake for hours makes it more tempting to think “just one glass to help me sleep”. But I’m going to have to just accept it as one of the things to go through and hope it improves as my cravings get less.

I’m doing major cut down January rather than completely dry. My drinking's been going on too long (years as opposed to months) to just suddenly stop. But I’ve joined as reading how everyone is doing helps my motivation and it’s useful to pick up tips.

So for this first week I’m going to aim to stick to half a bottle (instead of a bottle and a half!). I read it takes 4-5 days for your body to get used to a lower amount so weekly cut downs feel about right.