What’s the worst thing you’ve found out about someone after they’ve died?

[Watisthis]

Going through a big shocker at the minute. Has anyone ever had something massive come out after a loved one has passed away?

I was thinking about diaries recently. Mine, particularly when I was younger, are full of angst and anger and sad things. I actually had a pretty happy childhood, had a great life as a young adult. But I only seemed to write in a diary when I was upset. So if my kids read mine they would think I'd had a really sad life and that's just not true. Even when they were babies I tended to write about sleepless nights and stuff, I didn't ever write the fun things. Or at least not in my diaries.

I think I'll get rid.

Pages of angst about a relationship in my early 20s. No-one needs to read that.

When my father died , I was only sixteen could be why I wasn't told, I found out he had been married before had baby who had died because the mother had rolled on it in bed. Why did they never talk about things,

When my mother's aunt died we discovered that her two youngest children were actually her grandchildren.Their mother was one of her daughters and they'd been fathered by the husband of another one of my mother's aunts.
My mother wasn't at all shocked by this revelation because she'd seen her cousin holding hands with her uncle on more than one occasion and (to quote my mother) 'both kids were funny looking,like him'.

Late grandfather was actually the son of a lord.his mother was a servant and had fling with said lord she married a local man very soon after fling and claimed my grandfather was born early (obviously he wasn't!)

VERY few people know! He would have obviously had a claim to the title and estate but didn't find out himself so had no idea. His sister told us after his death she was younger so her dad was who my grandfather thought was his) and looking at photos they were IDENTICAL at the same age throughout life. Scarily both also died at the same age (80's)

Sister showed us letters etc so there's no doubt it's true.

Yes I was definitely shocked....😆

@Artemi

No ones really sure, I wonder if it came out of one of them losing a FB account access and having to come up with a new profile, or possibly inventing a character so they could be nice as themselves and put the smack down as the alter... within the group (except that never notably happened...).

Could also have been boredom, I doubt loneliness as they were involved in a hobby that got them out and seeing other people for a while, even whilst their health deteriorated (and that was confirmed by real people i know exist, who saw them)...

We'll never know the truth, I can't believe it was for malicous reasons as there was just no attempt ever to do anything bad, scam anyone, nothing like that.

Just one of those very strange things some people do!

bonetala; if he was illegitimate, he'd have had no claim to the title or estate.

He'd wanted a kitchen extension. I'd disagreed with it - not just because of money, I wanted the garden space. He was under no illusions about whether I wanted it.

After he died I found out he'd secretly had surveyors out for the extension without telling me.

The extension would have relied on money from my inheritance from my mum.

Not dead yet....in fact, I'm his carer. He's almost 100.

He is a man who was into spy cameras and horrible pornography way back in the seventies. He has so many secrets. I look after him because he has no one else and I am so good and decent to him...he probably has no memory of the deviant he was. But I do and I despise who he was. I still give him the best care because that is how my MUM, his sister, brought me up.

Women are so much better as humans, than men.

This has made me think that I have 2 half siblings and I haven’t told my children about them (they’re only little at the moment). The siblings are not part of my life and while I may see them in passing they’re not part of my life, I don’t consider them as brothers/sister (I already have those) and tbh they are a reminder of a really awful time in my childhood so I could see this being me.

I read my FiL's diarys. He'd kept them all from age 10, in the air force during the war and died at over 80.

70 years of what the weather was doing and bowel details. And that was it, nothing about anything else, at all.

Whaaaaat? Holy moly

Hm we thought that. Maybe that was the case. From their perspective though they were confused as they didn’t know of any problems really and had been in touch with my grandfather over the years.
Still, we are happy to have a relationship with at least this one extra cousin!

After my Mum died, we found her diaries and she clearly hated me and had written some awful things in them about me. This was last year and it’s proving very difficult to come to terms with and to know how I actually feel as I’d loved her as my Mum so grieve that but then my feelings for her have changed now I know her thoughts.

A family friend died and we discovered that he’d been adopted twice. His ‘real’ parents died in an accident then his first adoptive Mum died of a heart attack so he was adopted by a member of her family. He was my Dad’s closest friend and he never told him anything. He left almost everything to our family to thank my Dad for being such a good friend.

Through texts on my late husband's phone, I found he'd been secretly seeing his son from his first marriage for the past four years. I did know about him, but I'd never met him in our 30 year marriage. My BIL invited him to the funeral.

Me and my cousins found out we had an extra Uncle when the person doing the service at my Gran’s funeral read out the list of her children!

Our parents knew, he was just never talked about as he was adopted as a baby 😞 My aunt got in touch with him a few years later and he’s doing well living abroad but didn’t want any further contact.

Similar thing here when my DF died. Found a hand gun in his shed which must have been from WWII. My cousin remembers seeing it and said my DF had told him it was a starting pistol. I dutifully handed it into the police station, but they were very disinterested. Perhaps this happens quite often?

My dad's grandad was a drinker and abused his wife and kids and put everything else before them. He did sod all and several times they were found in complete poverty with him peeing what little bit of money (including wages his young children brought in to pay bills because he wasn't) up the wall.

He was one of the first people prosecuted in court by the NSPCC way back when and was locked up for his crime when the landlady (who wasn't getting paid either) called them and the police in because of it all.

When he was released he still treated his family like dirt. His wife (My dad's gran) was a lot younger than him (seems that he got her pregnant then 'had' to marry her) and became ill through the abuse to the point she was practically paralized. He then abandoned all the children and his wife and they had to go into the workhouse where she died not long after. The elder ones were able to get jobs at sea to prove that they could look after the younger ones with wages. Sadly before they could come back with enough money to be allowed to take the younger children out -t he two youngest boys had been sent over to Australia never to be seen again.

We knew nothing of this until about 2 years ago. (happened early 1900s)

My grandad lived alone, along way from us, he had very little. When he died my mum arranged for a local house clearance company to clear the house and sell everything. They had to call in the police and army, they found dozens of guns, ammunition and a few unexploded handgrenades.

Not dead (unfortunately) but one day my old boss (sensitive industry, think funeral care type thing) vanished out of the blue. Was in work on Tuesday talking about plans for tomorrow, meetings etc. Then poof. No getting hold of him, his next of kin, or anyone who knew him. No one would answer.

Turns out he had been arrested for paedophilia. He has a back catalogue of indecent images going back a good 10+ years and that's just the stuff they found. I was physically unwell when I found out. He worked closely with a LOT of bereaved parents and their children and babies.

I totally read this wrong and missed out the rampant bit 😭 just thought there was a giant rabbit in the wardrobe.

My Mum had lied to me about me receiving some inheritance. There was none & she knew it.

What an awful thing to happen. I hope your mum’s ok and has some peace of heart and mind.

This is hilarious. Love it 😆

I found out that my aunt (mum’s elder half sister) had been in more foster homes than we were told by her DM (my nana).

We sort of knew but found out by reading his memoirs after he died, that my grandad (mum’s DF) had been treated appallingly during and after WW1 by the Germans as his DM was German but his DF was dual national French/English. They lost a lot (worked for nobility) possessions wise and finance wise as the Nazis looted and took the lot and his DF was sent to a hard labour camp. It was adults including teachers who were unkind, the children mostly stuck up for him against the adults. When he told us stories of life in Germany it was always rose tinted glasses stories of countryside in Bavaria but I suppose it was too painful to tell us the sad stuff.