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Original poster

Feel shit that I haven't done a picture ready party for DD

113 replies

chasseslady · 09/12/2022 17:12

DS is 6.

He has severe special needs but he's beautiful and has come on a lot recently, despite profound disability

I have friends I've met through DD (a baby), and they had children a similar age to my DS.

I've been invited to 2 of their parties and came along to both, with just DD (they also have babies)

Anyway, their parties were amazing and photo ready

Balloon arches, colour coordinated to suit the theme. One had a superhero party, but it was 'tastefully' done in blue and red muted tones

3 tier cakes. Professionally done and looking amazing

Special guest appearances (Peppa pig, and one had Spider-Man)

DJ and childrens entertainer.

The bouncy castle in the theme of the party. The toddler soft play they've rented is a tasteful colour.

A very aesthetically pleasing grazing table

Party bags with each guest's name on

My party for DS is... a red velvet cake from Costco (his favourite), a generic bouncy castle that I don't actually know the colour of until it's delivered, and a random selection of foods I've laid out

I just feel shit. I know DS will love it but what about DD? Assuming she has no development issues, she will want me to pull out all the stops and won't she look back and wonder why I didn't, when everyone else's partners did?

As a 90's kid I loved my 'basic butch' parties but everyone had the same. I just feel so down Blush not sure why I'm posting Sad

Feel shit that I haven't done a picture ready party for DD
Feel shit that I haven't done a picture ready party for DD
Feel shit that I haven't done a picture ready party for DD
OP posts:
Original poster
chasseslady · 09/12/2022 17:13

*thread title should say DS!

But I suppose it more so applies to DD when she's older Sad

OP posts:
Blondlashes · 09/12/2022 17:16

parties for kids should be fun - and what your child wants/will like. Not what looks good on photos.
Try not to compare. Enjoy the chaos and fun.

upfucked · 09/12/2022 17:16

You need to get off social media and focus on who you put the party on for. The other parents it was their child and insta for you it was your child. Neither is wrong. Just different.

Interested in this thread?

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6 year olds
Stompythedinosaur · 09/12/2022 17:17

The tasteful colour schemes are not likely to be of any import to any of the DC, nor is the photo-readiness!

Being able to have a party with friends is important to dc, and that is what you are doing.

My dc are older, and my experience is that there is a wide range of parties parents do, and the DC seem equally keen regardless of how Instagram they are.

You are doing a great job, don't worry.

MillyMollyManky · 09/12/2022 17:17

Balloon arches and grazing tables for 6yos? That really isn't the norm.

Please don't compare your lovely-sounding party to that- it's for your DS not for Instagram. And don't assume that your friends' parties are in any way typical- they really aren't. Most people's parties are more like yours.

GrazingSheep · 09/12/2022 17:18

Why are you so focused on what other people do?

blacksax · 09/12/2022 17:18

Picture ready?

Don't be daft.

CircleofWillis · 09/12/2022 17:18

Have you posted pictures from the actual parties you attended? If so I think you should ask for them to be removed.

Original poster
chasseslady · 09/12/2022 17:19

CircleofWillis · 09/12/2022 17:18

Have you posted pictures from the actual parties you attended? If so I think you should ask for them to be removed.

Of course not, they're just similar examples

OP posts:
saveforthat · 09/12/2022 17:20

For goodness sake. Your children are loved and you have made an effort to give them a party. That's enough. What child wants a colour coordinated party. When I was young my Mum put aside some money every week by giving to the shopkeeper to get me a tiny tears lookalike doll from the corner shop. ( She couldn't afford the real tiny tears). I still remember that, I was so pleased with the doll. I was about 5. I'm 63 now. Step away from people who do everything for the photos and enjoy experiences with your children. Best wishes

pinneddownbytabbies · 09/12/2022 17:21

An aesthetically pleasing grazing table at a kids' party isn't going to look like that for very long, is it? Like maybe about 45 seconds... 😂

ComfortablyDazed · 09/12/2022 17:22

A ‘photo ready’ party?

I’ve heard it all now.

OP - your children don’t care if their party is ‘photo ready’ or not.

Original poster
chasseslady · 09/12/2022 17:22

pinneddownbytabbies · 09/12/2022 17:21

An aesthetically pleasing grazing table at a kids' party isn't going to look like that for very long, is it? Like maybe about 45 seconds... 😂

It was for the adults (with Prosecco!). The kids didn't have a table. They got served something at both parties

OP posts:
Coffeaddict · 09/12/2022 17:23

It's a kids party as long as they have some party food and games you've done your job.

Stop comparing. And no 7 year old I have ever met cares about colour schemes

Got2besoon · 09/12/2022 17:23

Do you live in LA?!

My DS would be over the moon with a bouncy castle, sounds ace.

SusiePevensie · 09/12/2022 17:23

Tbh your party sounds more fun.

OhhhhhhhhBiscuits · 09/12/2022 17:24

We just turn up at booked soft play, have chicken nuggets and chips in a box, have some cake and the kids go crazy for 2 hours and leave with a party bag! No child needs all this extra crap that people put on Instagram. Go and have an amazing party that your child will enjoy!

Original poster
chasseslady · 09/12/2022 17:24

Coffeaddict · 09/12/2022 17:23

It's a kids party as long as they have some party food and games you've done your job.

Stop comparing. And no 7 year old I have ever met cares about colour schemes

I know the kids don't care now. But I just feel like I'm looked upon as the one with a shit party

I wish I could agree that most peoples parties are like mine but other friends from that friendship group have social media and theirs all look show stopping too!!

OP posts:
frozendaisy · 09/12/2022 17:25

Everyone had themed parties when in primary school, I decided to do our kid's first primary school birthdays at home, everyone came for the novelty I think.

They were fun.

plominoagain · 09/12/2022 17:27

Christ , who was giving the other parties ? Tamara Ecclestone ?

If your DS loves it , then that’s what matters . People ( and kids more importantly) remember the fun they had . They don’t remember perfectly co ordinated tasteful balloon arches or grazing platters of artfully curated charcuterie . Nor do they give a monkeys what colour the bouncy castle is as long as they can throw themselves on it after eating their own body weight in crisps and cocktail sausages .

JonSnowedUnder · 09/12/2022 17:27

My kids would be pissed off with balloon arch, balloons are for kicking and bopping in the air. I've got 3 kids been to loads of birthday parties and honestly kids just like running around and eating some junk food.

Gynaesaur · 09/12/2022 17:28

Seriously, for your own sake, you need to pay much less mind to what other people are doing and to what you see on social media.
I know I had some pretty good birthday parties as a little kid, but my memory of the details is foggy at best and I'm not very old. For young children, birthday parties are basically a green light to eat as much neon coloured sugary crap as you can stomach and run around like eejits with their friends.

Grazing tables, colour co-ordinated stuff, really any attempt for this to be "tasteful"... is very much for the parents to feel good about themselves. And "my decorations match more than your decorations" is a pretty sad way to get your kicks.
You sound like a great mum who just wants her children to be happy but, seriously, the kids won't care!

Somethingsnappy · 09/12/2022 17:29

Oh OP, don't you know the difference between a party that is done with social media in mind, and a party that is done entirely for the benefit of the child, with whatever resources can be managed? Do you really think a little child will give a flying rat's ass about 'picture perfect'? I know which party I'd rather take my child to! (clue - not the one with a muted colour theme for a 6 year old).

BobbyBobbyBobby · 09/12/2022 17:32

I think I may have one photo taken at one of my children’s parties over two decades ago and it’s a group shop of them all crammed together laughing and smiling.

No balloon arches or anything fancy, just old fashioned pass the parcel, musical chairs and general party excitement.

All this ‘for show’ stuff is for the adults benefit not the child’s.

Somethingsnappy · 09/12/2022 17:32

Although I would like to take a running dive into that 'grazing table'.

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