What was your local, shit club that you frequented in your youth?

[ShitMumsClub]

Nc for this one 😁

Mine was Langtrys in Beckenham. Absolute shit hole. We used to get in from 15 years old as the bouncers just asked for our date of birth and star sign! Would sneak bottles of wine in hidden in the lining of coats. Loads of weird, pervy men. Constant fights. I shudder to think of dd in that environment but 13yo me thought it was amazing.

Preachers also know as creatures.

Heaven and hell

Grand central

Chicago rock utter dive

@VariousVeins it's was Lautrecs!

Good to see so many of the quality establishments I frequented here!

Lautrecs/Langtrys

The inimitable Blue Orchid with the dodgy two bob croydon gangsters in the 'VIP' room, Yates's or cafe Moonshine before going in to the orchid

Cinderella's in Purley, later Jazz that had a massive drug raid one night

Scarlett's in Purley Oaks that was the size of a living room

Crystals above Selhurst Park, less said about that the better!

The famous sticky carpet of Cinatras, resplendent with dropping balloons from the ceiling at midnight

The Ritzy on Streatham High Road

Can you tell I'm a south London girl?!
Croydon actually used to be a really good night out, not so much now.... 😬

I think I had a night out here in 1998. Did it have a revolving dance floor?

@Phos I was scanning through hoping someone would mention the Frontier - happy days

You could even start your night watching a terrible Abba tribute or what was left of Showaddywaddy. What’s not to love.

Or the "laser show"

@ShitMumsClub @Rostbif
Another Langtrys clubber here!!
Absolutely loved it on a Friday night getting in with my fake Id, listening to Tim Westwood and getting the 54 bus haha!!

Court Jesters and Colonel Bogeys, Sandown, IOW. Seemed to remember snakebite and black (!!) was the drink to be seen with🤢

Yes Lautrecs! I remember now and the sticky carpet in Cinatras!

Do you remember when you could pay a certain amount to get in to Cinatras and have 8 free drinks? There was sometimes a free buffet too, upstairs but I don’t think we bothered.

I’m also a south London girl and grew up in Penge. So I know the area well!

@ShitMumsClub @frenchfancy81 Butch! Nicest bouncer ever!

The Krazy House in Liverpool.
Many funny times in there.
Liverpool was an amazing place to go out as a teenager/late teens.

@PigLightingBastard I used to go to Bensons in Remenham. And its earlier incarnation of Wheelers, when Sunday night was Student Night and we used to roll into school on Monday with the hangover from hell.

Rebeccas in Reading, underground near the station. Thick smoke and sticky carpets. Must have been closed down due to a lack of fire exits years ago. Went to many 18th birthday parties there. Also Top Rank in Reading, Fives Bar, the Whores Bed on Friar Street. And Saturday afternoon at the Hexagon if there was nothing else going on.

Cinatras (sinbin)
Caesers Streatham & Old Kent Road

La Parisienne in Folkestone. About as un-Parisian as it's possible to be.

I went on a blind date back in the 80s to Pantiles, we’ve been married 35 years now

Ragamuffins and Splinters in Camberley were our other haunts

No "shit club" thread is complete without a mention of the Savoy Club in Glasgow, known locally as the Suave Savvy.
Could only be outdone on the shit stakes by my local nightclub the Sunset Boulevard (the Bully) in Clydebank. Fights every night, and plastic tumblers. Fun times.

@VariousVeins didn't it used to be £14/15 quid for 'the laydeez' and £20 for blokes?
Guys had to wear a tie! Admittedly that was late 80s and they relaxed the tie bit in the 90s.
Never had the buffet from upstairs, some limp lettuce and dodgy pork and egg pie slices that I may have lobbed over the balcony once or twice... 😂

The aforementioned Conti in Manchester, also the Ritz on student night (Thursdays?) with its bouncing sprung dancefloor.

Butterflies in Oldham, and Faces (which we called Faeces) in Buxton when I was away at college there.

😂
I wasn't scared of covid, thats for sure.

I'm 41, so there's a good chance we were blagging our way in on the same nights!

Bierkeller
Thekla
Cosies
Star and Garter
The Queens Shilling

And various others I can't remember.
All in Bristol in the 90s

I loved Cosies! Never liked Thekla, I always found it horribly claustrophobic.
They aren’t crap clubs though, Cosies was awesome.

I did not find my true love there 😂it was full of randy teens when I used to go in the 00's

I've been to most the ones mentioned in Reading.

I can't remember the name of the one in Windsor, Bronx or something like that. It was down under some arches.

So many places from my youth in this thread. Bloody brilliant!

JJs.
After convincing the bouncer that you're 18 by flashing your cousins 18 pendant (although you're only 14) you'd head upstairs and spend your school lunch money on cheap drinks, probably southern comfort or archers.
If you told the DJ it was your bday you'd get a bottle of 'bubbly' (which you'd take to school and drink in the loos the following Monday)
If you walked through the club, to the right was a chill out room with a burger bar. But you were too busy dancing to "I'm horny" hoping the local cute lad would appreciate your gold hair mascara. Simpler times