Revenge secret Santa for the office b£#@!

[Surewhyknot]

I'm looking for the worst, most subtle insulting secret Santa gift for the office stirrer.. limit is £10 and we're opening them in person.

I'm torn between a pair of secondhand socks or a homemade loo roll cozy al la your grandma!

What are the worst you've had? Can I cast insult without being too overt??

I see more than a smattering, but I suppose we each have our perspective on what’s constitutes bullying

So many holier-than-thou responses!

the cover girl saying for bullies

A copy of Liz Truss's autobiography.

One of those chocolate spoon stirrers that come with a mug. Very Christmasy and I don't see how someone could find it offensive or complain. But also, stirrer

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a Bayliss & Harding gift set.

I think most people who give one as a secret Santa gift are doing so because:

(a) they genuinely think it’s a nice gift

or

(b) they don’t know the recipient well so have chosen to get a “safe” gift rather than take a guess and get it badly wrong

Dontdropyourmooncup this has hurt my heart. I would genuinely love to do secret santa with you. I love choosing gifts for people and seeing them open them and love them, and it sounds like you deserve more than a few 💔

This

👏

People get so judgemental on here about such strange things. I just don't understand it at all.

Self stirring mug with emoji poops on it 😂

It’s a low blow op. And will just make her nastier. She probably has issues and this is why she stirs things up. You never know what’s going on really. Better to give her something nice, may even make her less of a bitch.

OR get her a wooden cake spoon which says ‘favourite office bitch’ or something as a joke but maybe she’ll get the hint.

Rise above it and don't be nasty at Christmas

I’d actually really like a Baylis and Harding gift set. Maybe it says more about me, but that would be a treat!

I’d also enjoy the roses etc. I am the ideal
SS donee clearly. I like to think of many of these “vicious” chocolate and soap givers completely missing their mark and accidentally bringing joy.

I agree with this. I don’t understand how that gift will make you think the person is a shit gift giver or no fucks were given. The fact that they’ve got you a gift is nice enough even if it is something that they got during their weekly shop or whatever. Maybe they liked the packaging and thought someone would appreciate it

Have the people saying Bayliss and Harding are crap actually used any? I got given a set from SIL and expected it to be rubbish. It was one of the nicest scented baths sets I’ve had. Annoyed that I couldn’t find it again after Christmas.
Clearly they are ripping if the packaging from expensive brands hence the cheap and nasty image. But you could also argue that the high end brand is about the packaging and brand more than the product. So I don’t see it makes much difference aside fro the buyer paying more.

Yep. Dreadful stuff, strips all the good oils and moisturise from your skin. Leaves everything tight, dry and sore. Same as lots of other cheap crap. And plenty of expensive crap.

It's not about the cost, it's about the low quality of the bottle contents.

strips all the good oils and moisturise from your skin

All soap does that.

I've no idea if I've ever used B&H or not. Probably, at some point. I'm fortunate not to have any allergies etc, but I've never used a handwash or shower gel that was so awful I had to check the bottle to make sure I never used it again.

I know I'll get a lot of princesses waving peas at me for this, and maybe a couple of them are for real, but I bet that for the overwhelming majority of people, you could stick B&H stuff in a plain bottle and they'd never know.

At any rate, the idea that it's universally reviled outside of MN as so offensively bad that it is a literal insult is nonsense.

Not surprised OP didn’t come back he or she sounds as if they’re about 19 and hopefully have learned something valuable from this post and the responses.

I think the offensive thing to me is why would you gift someone smelly hygene stuff unless your claiming they smell?

The only time I got gifted a LOT of smelly bath stuff was right at the onset of pubity, I also heard adult talking about 'smelling' its was bloody awful and the first time I remember 'thinking' about my body and being paranoid.

Soap is hardly a 'normal' gift to give someone, what other message is it meant to send except 'here have a bath' adding 'smells' to that just has an added 'you stink so were trying to cover it' element.

I mean theres nothing wrong with 'femmefresh' or 'mouthwash' in general, people use it and it does the job fine but as you can see from PP its clearly offensive as a secret santa gift.

I mean you wouldn't gift toothpaste in a fancy box regardless of if its 'nice enough' to use or not would you.

I think the offensive thing to me is why would you gift someone smelly hygene stuff unless your claiming they smell?

Smellies (scented gift toiletries) are a very standard gift, to the point where they're considered quite bland and safe for someone you don't know very well.

I've never heard anyone claim that it means the recipient smells. It's just that everyone uses toiletries so they're usually a pretty safe bet. And they're scented so hopefully they give a nice experience. People do make a thing out of a nice bath or shower or body care session, in a way they don't for brushing their teeth. It's a sensuous experience.

If we're going to go down this route, we could say the giver is saying they know you wash a lot and take hygiene seriously so here is something that know you'll use and love.

Oh give over, mam. You know fine well the difference between standard hygiene products such as toothpaste, deodorant etc, and gift sets. Which are marketed as...gift sets. For giving. As gifts.

Or indeed at any time of year

Would you include a 4 pack of deodorant, as per the PP?

Given some of the responses - it would go either way

No, I wouldn't include deodorant. But shower gels, soaps, lotions and potions are so universally considered to be gift material that they are sold in gift boxes and gift sets. It's not an inherent, automatic insult to give someone a smelly set.

You do know that's all in your head, don't you? And as others have said, what's the difference between picking up a B&H gift set in the supermarket or Boot's, and most of the other gifts people buy for people they don't know very well? How many people spend hours poring over artisan crafts websites or trailing round Christmas markets looking for something unusual and beautiful and ideally suited to someone they hardly know?