Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Help! Really f**ked up!

170 replies

ToastyTots · 08/11/2022 18:03

So DS slightly inflated his degree grade from a 2:2 to a 2:1.

It took him a long time to find a job after graduation so I told him to put 2:1 on his CV and he got a good job soon after. That job didn't check and he was there for 3 years. A management change early this year made the culture very toxic and it took a big strain on his MH so he resigned and was without a job for a few months until he was offered another much better job last month.

He had kept the 2:1 on his CV. New job had a screening process which asked him to put his degree grade in and as he'd kept the 2:1 on his CV, I told him he needed to put that down.

They've now asked for his degree certificate!

He's already started working for them and really loves it.

WTH can he do? He'll be sacked in the spot when he produces the certificate wont he!

Obviously not going to alter it as that'll land him in worse trouble.

OP posts:
GiltEdges · 08/11/2022 18:05

Well yes, he likely will lose his job for lying once they find out. But he’s an adult, so he’s responsible for the choices he made. You, of course, were still an idiot for telling him to lie in the first place, which has ultimately caught up with him.

MammaWeasel · 08/11/2022 18:07

I agree with @GiltEdges

rightkindofwrongg · 08/11/2022 18:09

He can be honest and they can sack him, he can quit if they do that. Or he can own up to it say it was a mistake and give them the correct certificate

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 08/11/2022 18:09

Why on earth did you encourage your son to lie??
Such a stupid and deceitful thing to do and if someone can lie about that the view is they can lie about anything so they'll think he's dishonest thru and thru
I can't see how anyone would think this is a good idea tbfh

Sparklingbrook · 08/11/2022 18:12

GiltEdges · 08/11/2022 18:05

Well yes, he likely will lose his job for lying once they find out. But he’s an adult, so he’s responsible for the choices he made. You, of course, were still an idiot for telling him to lie in the first place, which has ultimately caught up with him.

This is my thoughts too.

Sparklingbrook · 08/11/2022 18:13

Obviously not going to alter it as that'll land him in worse trouble

How would you intend to do that? 🙈

Namechanger355 · 08/11/2022 18:14

Am pretty shocked at this - you can’t just lie about your results like that! Totally takes away from people who have actually achieved 2.1s and it’s fraudulent and deceitful

he needs to say it should have read 2.2, deal with the Consequences and move on

hopefully the experience he has built up will help him to land another position if needed

you need to teach your child not to lie!

Oddieconvert · 08/11/2022 18:14

Literally nothing to be done other than withdraw from the process.

Namechanger355 · 08/11/2022 18:15

Sparklingbrook · 08/11/2022 18:13

Obviously not going to alter it as that'll land him in worse trouble

How would you intend to do that? 🙈

Please please please do not alter his certificate!

can’t believe that’s even a thought that’s gone through your mind!

you do realise there are serious consequences for fraudulent behaviour and you are setting up your child to fail if you encourage this behaviour

Oddieconvert · 08/11/2022 18:16

Bloody hell op

you and he has totally fucked up. And there’s no escaping that fact. He’s screwed. Thanks to his mother

TwoRockSalmonAndAHaporthOfChips · 08/11/2022 18:16

ToastyTots · 08/11/2022 18:03

So DS slightly inflated his degree grade from a 2:2 to a 2:1.

It took him a long time to find a job after graduation so I told him to put 2:1 on his CV and he got a good job soon after. That job didn't check and he was there for 3 years. A management change early this year made the culture very toxic and it took a big strain on his MH so he resigned and was without a job for a few months until he was offered another much better job last month.

He had kept the 2:1 on his CV. New job had a screening process which asked him to put his degree grade in and as he'd kept the 2:1 on his CV, I told him he needed to put that down.

They've now asked for his degree certificate!

He's already started working for them and really loves it.

WTH can he do? He'll be sacked in the spot when he produces the certificate wont he!

Obviously not going to alter it as that'll land him in worse trouble.

Going from a 2:2 to a 2:1 isn’t ‘slightly inflating’. It puts you up into a category from which your are sleigh level to study at masters level, for instance.

It’s just lying, and I’m surprised he hasn’t been found out before now. What sort of parenting were you doing when you advised him to lie so substantially?

I hope he works in a wide field, because this sort of thing has a habit of getting around. Nobody wants to employ a liar.

Merlott · 08/11/2022 18:17

His grade clearly had no impact on his ability to do the job he was hired for!

It's just gatekeeping for no good reason.

He will have to come clean of course... but the important thing is now he has the years of experience which will be what he was hired for

If not he has to take his bumps get sacked, correct his CV and get another job.

No big deal and kudos to you and him for getting him into that first job!

WendyWagon · 08/11/2022 18:17

Don't panic.
Hand in the certificate and adjust any LinkedIn quote. Poker face. There is nowt he can do. If they say, 'Johnny you lied' say sorry, I made a mistake. My son (23) says never quote grade. Degrees show intellectual potential.

I am the reverse, I never tell anyone where I went to uni as they drive me potty. Why Oxford blah blah. I only mention on it here as no one knows me and most people hate me for it! Hopefully he is good at his job. Good luck.

SkylightSkylight · 08/11/2022 18:18

Yes, you have, totally stupid fucking advice to give your son.

However, so has he, he's was applying for jobs, not a nursery place, he could have used his own brain to work out that it was a stupid thing to do & a totally fucking stupid thing to repeat at this new job. He should have corrected the grade onhis CV & relied more on the job he's had to boost his CV. Idiot.

He needs to admit he LIED (not say it was a mistake) and really seriously apologise and say how much he wanted the job & hoped he could prove his worth & make up for it.

hopefully he'll learn from this & maybe he could do industry relevant study while he looks for another job.

& hopefully you've learned a lesson too 🤔

finallydones · 08/11/2022 18:19

How long ago was it, could he say it was a typo?

Oddieconvert · 08/11/2022 18:19

sorry, I made a mistake. My son (23) says never quote grade.

he will be out. For the lie.

and most decent jobs asks for the grade because there’s a gulf between a first class candidate and a third

Afterfire · 08/11/2022 18:19

I don’t necessarily think he’ll get sacked. Maybe it won’t make that much of a difference? Maybe he could just pretend that he thought he’d put 2:2 on the form and didn’t realise he’d made a “mistake”?? 🤔

Oddieconvert · 08/11/2022 18:20

WendyWagon · 08/11/2022 18:17

Don't panic.
Hand in the certificate and adjust any LinkedIn quote. Poker face. There is nowt he can do. If they say, 'Johnny you lied' say sorry, I made a mistake. My son (23) says never quote grade. Degrees show intellectual potential.

I am the reverse, I never tell anyone where I went to uni as they drive me potty. Why Oxford blah blah. I only mention on it here as no one knows me and most people hate me for it! Hopefully he is good at his job. Good luck.

How old are you? Can’t remember last time k was asked and I’m in my early forties

Wibbly1008 · 08/11/2022 18:20

They will want to check he has the degree rather than the grades . Give over the cert and say nothing, I doubt they’ll check the grade to be honest

Original poster
ToastyTots · 08/11/2022 18:21

Yes I know it was a stupid thing to do but I said just change it a 2:1 and see what happens after he'd been trying to get a job for months. Then he got one! It's been 3 and a half years, previous employer didn't ask for it and he got a good reference.

I'm thinking he should drag it out a bit by saying he'd have to apply for a new certificate as he's lost it. Give him a month or so, so they can see he's a good worker and he can earn a bit of money at least, then tell them if they insist?

Or it is better to tell them now when he's probably going to get sacked straightaway and will only get a week and a bit pay?

OP posts:
Oddieconvert · 08/11/2022 18:21

All these posters saying to say “it was a mistake”

So he avoids being seen as a liar but is then seen as…. Not the sharpest tool in the box shall we say

Oddieconvert · 08/11/2022 18:23

Surely fact that he didn’t get a job when putting 2.2 but then immediately got a good job when he out 2.1 indicates the grade is rather important in his industry

Oddieconvert · 08/11/2022 18:23

ToastyTots · 08/11/2022 18:21

Yes I know it was a stupid thing to do but I said just change it a 2:1 and see what happens after he'd been trying to get a job for months. Then he got one! It's been 3 and a half years, previous employer didn't ask for it and he got a good reference.

I'm thinking he should drag it out a bit by saying he'd have to apply for a new certificate as he's lost it. Give him a month or so, so they can see he's a good worker and he can earn a bit of money at least, then tell them if they insist?

Or it is better to tell them now when he's probably going to get sacked straightaway and will only get a week and a bit pay?

If he does the former, he will leave and they will give him a shit reference

SkylightSkylight · 08/11/2022 18:24

Ok, if they are only asking fir the certificate and arent querying the grade, I'd just put it into a large envelope and hand it over. Deal with the lie if they query it.

Sparklingbrook · 08/11/2022 18:24

I do think the DS should take responsibility for all this TBH. He, as an adult graduate should have said ' thanks for that stupid suggestion Mum/Dad but I can't do that as it's fraud'.