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Original poster

Opinions on teacher's behaviour before I over react...

389 replies

Namechangedforthisone287 · 02/11/2022 18:14

I have name changed, but only because I've discussed this IRL with friends so I don't want this linking back to personal medical things I've posted about recently.

DD is 12 and in year 7. This week they are doing tests in all subjects. Clearly, these should be conducted in silence. This afternoon, they have been doing a history test (DD says short test, only 6 questions) and her friend has spoken to her. DD felt she had to reply so as not to be rude. Another friend has then mouthed something to her from across the room, and DD has given her a thumbs up. The teacher has seen all of this, and has taken DD's test paper off her, and said she'll have to redo the test tomorrow in form time, by herself. He has then ripped her test paper up over the bin.

DD says she was humiliated and embarrassed as everyone was looking at her. She cried at the time, and cried when she told me about it.

Now, DD can be a chatterbox and absolutely should have got on with her test and not interacted with her friends. I can understand that it may have looked like she was cheating. But I'm really unhappy with how things were handled by the teacher. Fair enough to take her test and make her re do it, but tearing it up and making a spectacle of DD is a bridge too far in my book.

WWYD? She doesn't want me to make a fuss.

OP posts:
PicaNewName · 02/11/2022 18:16

I personally wouldn't do anything. I agree the public humiliation isn'f nice but it's not something I'd make a fuss about.

Greaterthanthesumoftheparts · 02/11/2022 18:17

Meh DDs fault entirely. Not wanting to be rude is a ridiculous excuse for talking in an exam setting. Better she learns it now than gets disqualified from a GCSe or A level later.

Parker231 · 02/11/2022 18:17

Sounds an appropriate punishment. If it was an external exam she would have disqualified, she has got off lightly this time.

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VanillaParkersBowl · 02/11/2022 18:17

Was your DD the only one he punished?

Suzi888 · 02/11/2022 18:17

I wouldn’t do anything. Your DD doesn’t want you to, plus she did actually communicate with another child under exam conditions. I suppose the teacher wanted to make an example of her, harsh but she probably won’t do it again (and neither will anyone else).

RunningFromInsanity · 02/11/2022 18:17

WWYD?
Take your daughters version with a pinch of salt - of course it was all instigated by other people..

Tell her not to talk during tests.

NiceTwin · 02/11/2022 18:18

Tell her to take her punishment on the chin and learn from her mistakes.
I should imagine the teacher was somewhat exasperated at the pupils inability to follow the basic instruction of work in silence.

I wouldn't make a fuss if I was her mother.

User135792468 · 02/11/2022 18:18

That is considered cheating when talking or making gestures in a test. It’s not that big a deal that they ripped it and put it in the bin. Your daughter is embarrassed she got caught and told off. Lesson learnt and now it’s time to move on. She won’t do it again and neither will other children. Maybe teach her to stand up for herself and do what’s right instead of replying to “not be rude”. She knew the expectations of the assessment and didn’t follow them. Doing the assessment in form time is not that big a deal. In most schools that would be an hour detention after school.

TeenDivided · 02/11/2022 18:18

I'm not sure. it seems harsh
but
They were clearly making an example because later on that kind of behaviour would see her getting disqualified from her GCSE exam.
And she did a) talk and b) interact with a second student so it wasn't even a one off.

Skelligsfeathers · 02/11/2022 18:18

Being embarrassed is the consequence of breaking the rules.
Simple!

Do nothing. Just let it be a lesson for her.

Mrsuntidy · 02/11/2022 18:18

YABU

BobbyBobbyBobby · 02/11/2022 18:19

I am on the teachers side with this.

Your daughter is old enough to understand that she mustn’t speak even as a reply and that giving the thumbs up is a distraction to others.

lesson learnt.

Choconuttolata · 02/11/2022 18:19

I wouldn't make a fuss, she shouldn't have been talking to her friend or engaging in non verbal communication. If she did this in her GCSE's or A levels it would mean that she might be disqualified and her paper ripped up. She won't do it again having learnt this lesson.

Pumperthepumper · 02/11/2022 18:19

Why did he rip it up if she’s to do it tomorrow?

StripeyDeckchair · 02/11/2022 18:19

Lesson learned, hopefully she won't break exam rules again.

Not wanting to be rude is bullshit, she & her friend were talking which is not allowed

green82 · 02/11/2022 18:19

Honestly I would leave it. It probably was overkill if she is an otherwise good student, but it was a test in test conditions and this is the only way they will learn, she is probably being made an example of. She won't do it again! It's high school now, so it's a steep learning curve. I don't think the teacher went too far to warrant you stepping in.

RambamThankyouMam · 02/11/2022 18:19

Perfectly appropriate punishment.

Your DD needs to learn not to be so easily led.

3peassuit · 02/11/2022 18:20

If she did this in a public exam, she would be disqualified. It’s a harsh lesson but one she will remember. I wouldn’t bring it up with the teacher.

BretonBlue · 02/11/2022 18:20

She’ll never do it again, will she?

Cocopogo · 02/11/2022 18:20

what would I do?
Absolutely nothing other than tell DD I hope she wouldn’t do anything so dumb again.
Probably good idea teacher made a show of it by ripping up the paper in the hope that the rest of the kids also learn not to be so dumb too. Not sure what the big deal is. Crying seems like an over reaction but girls of that age can cry about all sorts of random crap sometimes. Just don’t make a fuss or she’ll learn to cry more.

Letmedowneasy · 02/11/2022 18:20

I think you need to keep calm about this situation and realise you are talking about 12 year old girls.
The ripping up of the test is over unnecessary but the rest is perfect fine, your DD was in exam conditions and shouldn't be answering her friend whether that seems rude or not.

Hopefully it's a lesson learnt and next time she will decide not to interact with classmates during a test.

Pinkflipflop85 · 02/11/2022 18:22

Hopefully she's learned her lesson.

healthadvice123 · 02/11/2022 18:22

Life lessons sometimes are harsh and you have one side only

Superwash · 02/11/2022 18:22

The ripping up was maybe a bit OTT, but we had tonreport a similar incident in a science GCSE last summer.

One candidate asked another a question. The 2nd candidate gave an answer (which was wrong!) both were reported for misconduct. The candidate who asked the question had their paper marked, the one who answered the question was disqualified.

cansu · 02/11/2022 18:22

Putting the test in the bin and ripping it up is not something I would have done. However, your dd was speaking in test conditions and communicating with another student across the room. She was essentially disrupting the test. You also only have dd's word for what happened so there is every chance there is more that you are not being told. You could complain that her test paper should not have been ripped up. It is hard to say how or whether she was made a spectacle of or whether she was simply embarrassed to be caught. Regardless, you can't complain about the sanction. The teacher has every right to tell her off and to insist she retakes the test in her own time.

If you complain about the ripping up, the teacher may say either they are sorry she was upset or that they were simply destroying the test as she may have cheated. You also give the impression to your dd that her talking as 'she didn't want to be rude' to her friend is somehow a reasonable thing to say instead of a pathetic excuse!