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Original poster

Lo! The ultimate cheeky fucker has been found

318 replies

learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 15:04

A friend of mine died suddenly a few weeks ago. He had separated from his wife last year and had made a will.
He had been invited to a wedding next year. The mother of the bride texted his ex-wife asking that money from his estate be used to buy a gift for the couple.

Everyone who knew and loved him is still reeling from his death. But the important thing for this woman is her daughter still gets a gift from him. How in the name of all that is good and holy would you ask that?
My friend, God love him, was a tight bastard and would have been buying the cheapest thing on the registry; which makes it even worse somehow.

OP posts:
Razzle5 · 28/10/2022 16:58

AnApparitionQuipped · 28/10/2022 16:56

I suspect there are two sides to this story and the way it's presented has missed out some vital information ...

If it is true

then absolutely 100%

and why would anyone think the ex wife has any involvement in the estate?

Original poster
learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 17:00

Laughing at the post saying I am the gossipy one in our circle - nailed it. Though I prefer to think of it as enjoying telling everyone anecdotes that will amuse or, in this case, stun them.
I swear on the wee donkey I am not trolling. You couldn’t make it up.
When this was relayed to me I thought it was going to end “and the mother of the bride asked for a momento from his house”.
Thanks for the condolences. There are some fabulous retorts here which mutual friends are going to enjoy, but I don’t think I’ll share it with his ex-wife.

I keep thinking, even if he was going to give them Waterford crystal champagne flutes - and then the thought trails off because I’m so gobsmacked.
I chose the title with confidence.

OP posts:
PuppyMonkey · 28/10/2022 17:01

Ex wife should forward the text to everyone in her contacts asking their advice on what to reply,Grin

BitossiBlues · 28/10/2022 17:02

Fluffycloudland77 · 28/10/2022 16:52

Tbh I can believe it, my dh just died and there’s relatives who now think they can treat my house like a smorgasbord. I’ve had texts “I want dh name guitar I bought him”

You can’t ask for gifts back just because they died.

I’ve had to change all my door locks because I can’t be certain they haven’t still got a set.

Sorry for your loss 💐
People can be utter, unthinking bastards.

Razzle5 · 28/10/2022 17:02

learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 17:00

Laughing at the post saying I am the gossipy one in our circle - nailed it. Though I prefer to think of it as enjoying telling everyone anecdotes that will amuse or, in this case, stun them.
I swear on the wee donkey I am not trolling. You couldn’t make it up.
When this was relayed to me I thought it was going to end “and the mother of the bride asked for a momento from his house”.
Thanks for the condolences. There are some fabulous retorts here which mutual friends are going to enjoy, but I don’t think I’ll share it with his ex-wife.

I keep thinking, even if he was going to give them Waterford crystal champagne flutes - and then the thought trails off because I’m so gobsmacked.
I chose the title with confidence.

So the ex wife remained very close to your friend following marriage breakdown? And is the trustee for his estate?

Fluffycloudland77 · 28/10/2022 17:03

@Razzle5 They are close family & incase we got locked out dh gave them spare keys so we could get in without a locksmith.

It won’t happen again, I’ll never let anyone have keys to my house again now.

It’s happened to other family members too “mom said I could have this” so it seems to be a thing amongst the more avaricious of us.

Rainbowsinthesky · 28/10/2022 17:06

PuppyMonkey · 28/10/2022 17:01

Ex wife should forward the text to everyone in her contacts asking their advice on what to reply,Grin

^^ This. 100% this. Absolute CF

BrightYellowDaffodil · 28/10/2022 17:06

So the ex wife remained very close to your friend following marriage breakdown? And is the trustee for his estate?

"Separated" indicates that they probably weren't legally divorced, and not all separations mean both parties are estranged/hate each other!

Send a book on manners and etiquette

With a large and brightly coloured post-it note highlighting the "Deaths & Funerals" section.

Kennykenkencat · 28/10/2022 17:08

I think I would give them a ouija board and tell them he will be watching them all.

Razzle5 · 28/10/2022 17:10

Was the ex wife invited as well?

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 28/10/2022 17:11

Ihatemyroad · 28/10/2022 16:44

I worked for a charity. One of the participants died shortly after taking part in a challenge event. The charity hounded his wife for his fundraising money. It was awful. He had a target of £1,500 and they kept calling, emailing, writing to her until eventually she turned up at the office with something like £800 and said she’d been so busy dealing with everything and she didn’t feel comfortable chasing people for their sponsorship money now he was dead. Awful awful behaviour by the charity.

Which charity? That is utterly ghastly and I would like to ensure that they never see a penny from me.

Original poster
learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 17:13

Fluffycloudland77: it’s hard when you’re grieving and people are focussed on objects. I think they do it to avoid their grief, or because they have gaping holes where their hearts should be.

Because the divorce is not finalised, the ex-wife is involved in settling the estate. It’s tremendously difficult and sad for her.

OP posts:
Razzle5 · 28/10/2022 17:15

learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 17:13

Fluffycloudland77: it’s hard when you’re grieving and people are focussed on objects. I think they do it to avoid their grief, or because they have gaping holes where their hearts should be.

Because the divorce is not finalised, the ex-wife is involved in settling the estate. It’s tremendously difficult and sad for her.

Bloomin heck… that’s going to be tricky. I suspect that might be an contested probate but his other loved ones!
Is the ex also going to the wedding?

Hawkins001 · 28/10/2022 17:17

SkylightSkylight · 28/10/2022 15:30

Im hoping, beyond hope, that you're a T.r.o'll. because if you're for real it's one of the most in fucking unbelievably cunty things I've heard of.

Trust me I've seen and read about a lot more than the ops post, people are omg at times.

AngelinaFibres · 28/10/2022 17:18

learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 15:22

And she did it by text! His ex- wife hasn’t replied: what on earth would you say to that?

I'm so sorry but he won't be able to buy the bride and groom a present....because he is dead. Thank you for your thoughtful condolences.

Or get a charity shop picture frame, the cheaper and naffer the better ,put a picture if him in it and send it to them in wedding paper.

Original poster
learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 17:19

Razzle5: just my friend who died. It would have been his first formal event going solo.

OP posts:
JudgeJ · 28/10/2022 17:21

learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 15:04

A friend of mine died suddenly a few weeks ago. He had separated from his wife last year and had made a will.
He had been invited to a wedding next year. The mother of the bride texted his ex-wife asking that money from his estate be used to buy a gift for the couple.

Everyone who knew and loved him is still reeling from his death. But the important thing for this woman is her daughter still gets a gift from him. How in the name of all that is good and holy would you ask that?
My friend, God love him, was a tight bastard and would have been buying the cheapest thing on the registry; which makes it even worse somehow.

Does Poundland do vouchers?

NumberTheory · 28/10/2022 17:22

You could suggest a massive portrait of the deceased.

What the CF is requesting isn’t even legal let alone moral, compassionate, or in good taste. The executor can’t just decide to do things with the estate that aren’t in the will because someone asked.

NoSki · 28/10/2022 17:22

ICanHideButICantRun · 28/10/2022 15:17

If ever there's a story for the DM it's this one.

This.
oh holy fuck, who does that!
I hope her family recognise her and everyone is aware of her totally shit behaviour

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 28/10/2022 17:22

Does Poundland do vouchers?

Give them one for 99p.

JudgeJ · 28/10/2022 17:25

Inca22 · 28/10/2022 15:30

I'd screengrab the text message, post it on here and it will be all over the internet and the Daily Fail by the evening.

I'd contact the Daily Mail directly, and all the other organisations that trawl for stories but have faces that suit MN, complete with screen shots and names, no need to be shy!

AngelinaFibres · 28/10/2022 17:29

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 28/10/2022 17:22

Does Poundland do vouchers?

Give them one for 99p.

Ooo a voucher for the least amount possible from Iceland frozen foods.

anonacfr · 28/10/2022 17:30

That is the best thing ever.

Razzle5 · 28/10/2022 17:30

learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 17:19

Razzle5: just my friend who died. It would have been his first formal event going solo.

So how did the MIL of the bride know the ex wife’s number? If the ex wasn’t invited, obviously not close to the couple, so why would the bride’s mother have the ex wife of a guests number!

Original poster
learieonthewildmoor · 28/10/2022 17:30

My friend had made a will.

OP posts:
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