Thinks I only read about on MN

[Wishimaywishimight]

I know this has been done a million times before, I think I may have even started a thread about it some time ago but I'm feeling irritable this morning so here we go;

"Put on your big girl pants" - I really truly fucking hate this saying. Does anyone else picture Bridget Jones with her big pants? It's such a stupid saying. Can you imagine anyone saying to a man "put on your big y-fronts"? No, of course not. It's utter meaningless. Just give whatever advice you are giving, if you have any, no need to preface it with stupid shit.

"He/She is an adult" - sometimes referring to an 18 year old (so just about, legally, an adult), sometimes referring to a person who is or may be upset by a situation. Surely we are all upset by things at times, not always reasonably but we are just human, most of us struggle at times, doesn't mean we are not adults.

"Man-child" - FFS, another daft one.

One that really and truly grates on me - "He/She is being manipulative" again referring to someone being upset by a person or situation. I have read this in relation to a parent being upset by their (adult) child moving overseas. In my world certainly, it would be acceptable for the parent to be upset, to cry even, at the loss of their child / grandchildren. Even to say "I wish you wouldn't go", it's not being manipulative, it's just being human.

"It makes my teeth itch" - it doesn't..

Also, and I know I'm a cow, but my inner response to many AIBU's is just "For fuck's sake, of course you are not being unreasonable, you know you're not. If you just want support or for people to agree with you then just say that."

There, that's helped. A little.

Mansplaining and manspreading.

Disgusting man hating terminology.

@BobbyBobbyBobby That is so true, there is a lot of man hate on here! The tiniest element of negative behaviour / emotion on the part of a man can be construed as "abusive" or "manipulative" when often it's just human behaviour which both men and women exhibit at times.

Red brick university’s
I have multiple degrees
My husband earns high six figures

People suggesting that something is a special mumsnet thing when actually it's a pure reflection of society

Don’t be so daft

All the gender critical stuff. Sorry but it just seems so bitter and hawkish, and anyone who disagrees gets shouted down. It feels like the people on that bandwagon think about it all day, every day and I just can’t get my head round that.

And Russell Group university’s

"Put on your big boy Y-Fronts" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 This tickled me OP!!! I'm going to say it to DP next time he has a moan! 🤣

Yes. I find it exhausting and inevitable how any thread where it's mentioned goes the same way.

I've got to say it... all of those things exist in real life.

There are many red brick universities

Oh my gosh I'm so glad you've said this. I somehow thought it was just me who felt exactly like this.

Mansplaining and manspreading

Both of these are sociological terms coined to reflect instances where men dominate space/conversation unthinkingly. They captured something women were experiencing but had few words for, at a time before we had ‘me too’ and gender privilege etc. They are useful terms but perhaps overused on MN.

I tell DP to put on his big girl pants 🤷‍♀️

the majority of your annoyances are about being told to behave like an adult. As much as we all need an outlet and empathy, sometimes that really is the only, unavoidable option. No point in wallowing in it.

Now come on.

No-one who cares that much about universities would misuse an apostrophe like that.

😁

All the cries of LTB. Sometimes people forget that there are real lives in play, and are simply gagging for the drama.

Years ago I was on a thread where the OP was extensively encouraged to LTB. She did, and slowly everyone lost interest in the thread and she just stopped posting.

I often wonder where she ended up or would she have left had she not been cheered on so much.

"I never say this but, LTB" said by posters who say it all the time.

I know you're having a bit of a rant, but....

Put on your big girl pants - isnt the equivalent "Put on you big boy pants"
It may just be me , but I've heard that in real life.

It makes my teeth itch - I think this is just an idiom.
A bit like "it boils my piss" or "I was over the moon"
It doesn't mean the piss was literally boiling, or the they literally went over the moon.

minou - indeed. It's not Big Pants but Big Girl. Put on the clothes that show you are an adult.

I suspect it's (shhhh!) American in origin and actually means trousers. As opposed to shorts, which children wear. Obviously co-opted some time ago, possibly even when they were still called slacks and mildly transgressive

To answer the question...

Not opening the door to a friend who turns up unexpectedly

Not wanting everyone people to come worship meet your new baby

(although, also: waiting hand and foot on perfectly healthy family members who have come round to meet your new baby)

Coloured Christmas lights being vulgar

Spending hours and hours on your offspring's university application

Getting involved in your offspring's student expenditure

😁

That's what I thought too.

I thought it orginated from the idea, that in the good old days parents would only dress their sons in shorts.

Only when they were old enough and the parents felt the son was now responsible they would then allow the son to wear trousers. As Americans call trousers, "pants", this has seeped into use (oh, the horror!)
It was a rite of passage and boys felt proud they were now seen as grown up

Yes but was it so funny that you spat our your coffee?? 😆

Ah, I know that really - just this morning (and quite a few other times tbh!) I felt like having a good old moan!

And what on earth is "an unmunsnetty hug" - seriously? A) it's not a hug and B) how is it "unmumsnetty"?? Many of the people on here are kind hearted who would happily offer a hug if they could.

"gives me the ick"

FFS, grow up.

Posters on certain other, less viperous websites, might type <hugs> or hug as an expression of support for a poster who is having a tough time. This is twee/tacky and NotTheMumsnetWay.

However, a MN poster might occasionally feel sufficiently moved by a fellow viper's plight that they break through their natural veneer of cool and offer [hugs] but need to explain that "yes, I know we don't do that here, I know it's ludicrous, I am a real MNer, and I apologise for my momentary lapse into sentimentality".