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What’s the best life advice you have been given?

186 replies

RosieLeaLovesTea · 22/10/2022 18:50

Interesting one - what is the best life advice you have been given and what you would pass onto someone?

OP posts:
NoraLuka · 23/04/2023 15:01

No doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

It’s a line from a poem but I like it for when things aren’t going as planned.

SockGoddess · 23/04/2023 15:02

Give up smoking by the time you hit 30, or by the time you have kids, whichever comes first (if you smoke obvs!) Said to me by a very caring older colleague and I did follow it, am v glad I did.

Don't be afraid to chuck it in the fuck it bucket. If something's not working don't just keep wasting time and energy on it because you don't want to be seen to give up. Sometimes you need to give up and start over/try something different.

And I don't know where I got this one but I try to live by it. Whatever you think is true/seems to be true, there's probably a way in which the opposite is true, or you can see it the opposite way round. It can help to see situations from all angles - even if you do have a firm view yourself, understand that others might see it totally differently. It makes you more tolerant and able to find compromise. Of course it doesn't apply to absolutely everything and doesn't mean you can't pick a side - but it can be very useful.

And lastly, plant a seed. With difficult or stubborn people, arguing may not convince them, even if you're demonstrably right. Instead just drop a little idea or suggestion, leave it a few days/weeks and they'll often decide it's a great idea (though they may believe it's their idea...) Works brilliantly.

SockGoddess · 23/04/2023 15:08

Oh and never burn your bridges with a colleague or client - however stupid/obnoxious/unreasonable they are. One day you could really need them (especially as a freelancer like me, but also for employed people) and if you piss people off they will pass it on to others.

So instead of saying/implying "No of course I won't do your dumb project for such shit money" say "I'm so sorry, I don't have time, but I'd love to work with you in the future if possible" etc. However much it rankles.

DustyLee123 · 23/04/2023 15:09

Trust your gut.

Twattergy · 23/04/2023 15:17

Baby hasn't read the book (re baby care/routine books)

BalloonSlayer · 23/04/2023 15:21

Before speaking:

  • Does this need saying?
  • Does this need saying right now?
  • Does this need saying by me?

I try to use this to help me from shooting my mouth off - that's what it's for! -but it helped me in an unexpected way recently, when I was very nervous about speaking at a funeral.

I realised that a) these nice things about the deceased needed to be said, b) it needed to be said at this point as it was the funeral, and c) yes it had to be me as there was no one else who was going to say what I had to say as they were my memories. My nerves melted away and I am someone who never speaks in public and who is well known to be a bundle of nerves.

worriedgasper · 23/04/2023 15:25

LaQuern · 23/10/2022 11:34

Surround yourself with good friends and seek their counsel often.

Never trust a man who wears a polo neck with a suit.

Brilliant

SockGoddess · 23/04/2023 15:37

Never trust a man who wears a polo neck with a suit.

The ones I have heard are:
Never trust a man with little chains on his shoes
Never trust a man whose neck is wider than his head Grin

But the one I think is truest is, never trust a man who says what a nice guy he is / easy-going / happy-go-lucky / trustworthy. Any man who feels he has to say that, probably isn't!

caringcarer · 23/04/2023 15:44

Always have a little fund that you can leave your DH if you need to. My Dad gave me £100 when I married in 1982 and told me to bank it in a separate account and not tell anyone I had it, including my Mum and DH. It was to be used if I ever needed to leave quickly.

Start a pension. When I got my first paycheck my Dad sat me down and told me about paying a full stamp so one day would get state pension but also to pay into private pension as much as I could before I had any children as he said I might want time out from employment for a few years after having kids.

I miss my dear wise old Dad so much. He always looked out for me and had my back no matter what.

On second marriage now and have a very healthy fuck off fund plus a decent private pension I'm drawing now as retired from teaching early, and can draw a full state pension in 5 more years.

AuntieMarys · 23/04/2023 16:00

Don't die before you're dead

toddlermom1 · 23/04/2023 22:05

Follow your own path

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