What’s the best life advice you have been given?

[RosieLeaLovesTea]

Interesting one - what is the best life advice you have been given and what you would pass onto someone?

Isolation is the dream-killer, not your attitude

Introduce yourself

Regarding work & getting on well: "always make sure the right person / people like you".

Never financially rely on a man

As soon as you start earning money, pay into a pension, even if it's only £20 a month

Put money into a savings account every month and forget about it.

Always carry a shovel in the boot of your car.

All from my Aunt - and every single piece of advice has served me well.

Your Aunt is a wise woman.

Why carry a shovel in your boot? Seems sinister

@blueshoes I know what you mean 🤣

She meant for digging cars out of snow. I always rolled my eyes at the advice until I got stuck in snow (and was able to dig myself out 😇)

@Halstead Your aunt seems like a wise woman indeed. Do tell more about a shovel please

Just get up.

Hitting the snooze button or grabbing an extra 10 minutes doesn't make getting up any easier. It just means you either have to set your alarm earlier than you need to get up. Or you will be running late from the first point of your day. And the first 3-4 minutes after getting out of bed are shite. Just urgh. Until you have had a wee and started your morning routine. Just urgh. And equally urgh if you have had 6 hits of the snooze button. Or none.

So set your alarm. Get up when it goes off. You will not feel any better. Or any worse. But you can just set your alarm for when you need to get up......

This sounds so small - but it has made such a difference to my mornings. Try it.

😂

Life isn't fair - this sounds really negative but actually, in a tough time in my life, it's what I needed to hear because it made me stop wishing over and over again that things were 'fair' and start accepting the situation and I actually felt much better for it.

@Ahwig - I was also going to possibly mention something like that; in fact you can take it further, ie will it matter in 3 months? 1 week?

Often the 'it' you're so upset about won't even matter next week

The challenge in life is to be yourself when others try to make you like everyone else.

My dad gave me a fridge magnet with that on when I went to university x

People like happy confident people

Always be financially independent and never, ever be financially dependent on a man.

The many, many appalling horror stories I have read on MN of women stuck in abusive relationships which they can’t afford to leave have horrified me and convinced me that the above was the best advice I have ever been given.

The best way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time

Pay into a pension when you're young

Begin by believing that people are acting with good intentions

Someone on MN gave it as advice their old boss had told her. It was around the time we were going through covid and I was getting mad with everyone. I always act with good intentions so why wouldn't other people? It calmed me down and changed my life. I don't even bother looking much at the news anymore.

When I have a worry I think will this matter in 6 days? 6 weeks? 6 months? 6 years?

Plan.
Work colleagues may become good friends but when you work together they are colleagues.
Maintain personal and professional boundaries.
If you can't write a cheque for it, you can't afford it.
Plan.

Get engaged, married and have children in that order.

You will never be able to please everyone so you may as well please yourself.

Advice given to me over 30 years ago by my older, very unassuming , now ex, SIL when I was planning my wedding whilst trying to keep my mum and mil happy!

These haven’t been “given” to me rather I found them through trying to find myself.

1. Dont respond to subtext. Don’t “do” guesswork. Insist on frank communication. If someone tells you they are “fine” then believe them. If someone is having a bad day believe that they are having a bad day - not that you’ve “done something”. Do not engage in game play in your relationships. Speak frankly and don’t engage with those who use passive aggression.

2. don’t believe everything you tell yourself.
   it is ok to have negative thoughts, you just don’t have to believe them. A thought without belief is like a balloon without air. It just wilts and dies. Your brain is a lying fucker sometimes - you can tell it to shut up whenever you need to.

3. you are living in the feelings of your thoughts. Change your thoughts, change your experience.

4. lift weights, walk, take care of your body.

Trust your gut, it’s the sum of your life experience.

So many good posts here!

@Googlecanthelpme Thanks for that

It is impossible to have a bad day if you do an hours yoga 🧘‍♀️ first thing in the morning.

You need to be your own cheerleader.

You are as important as your children.

Education and a career are priorities.

People can and do change.

Look after yourself as no one else will