If you're going through stressful times at the moment and can't talk to anyone irl about it for one reason or another...

[AmberGer]

Then let this thread be a support to you.
You don't have to disclose anything that you're not comfortable with.
I am also going through a lot at the moment that I can't talk to anyone about. It's deeply isolating.
I am procrastinating at the moment when I should be doing my housework.
Which doesn't help but I am making progress with some things. I have been more forgetful lately as I have been dealing with so much.
For the first time in my life I'm trying to be more organised and putting everything in my phone calendar. It helps to deal with one thing at a time and I can see what I need to do each day.
I hope this thread can be helpful to others in similar situations

I'm burnt out. My Dad is dying from liver cancer, we can't get support/care in due to his location and so my sister and I are sharing his care. We don't get on AT ALL and she's a complete control freak so I'm walking daily on eggshells waiting for the next eruption. Yesterday it was my giving him a ready meal (curry) that he'd asked for. Apparently it's got no nutritional value and he needs to be eating really healthily... she's clearly not heard the palliative nurse when she said that Dad isn't absorbing calories. And if he wants it, he can f*cking well have it.

I'm frantic that he's in debt, I don't know how we're going to pay for a funeral and he's got his heating on 24/7 and we're washing/drying mountains of clothing. His attendance allowance still hasn't been processed since bloody August. I've got 3 DC, one of whom has just been diagnosed with a life changing illness and needs extensive medical treatment. I'm not helping her as much as I can, and feel torn between her and Dad.
On top of this, DH and I run a business, I work full time and I've forgotten what sleep is. I look and feel like shit and have picked up a stinking cold. I just want to go to bed for 24 hours and keep the duvet over my head.
I'm so sorry that others are having a crap time too.

Thanks OP. I'll write all my woes down in a bit after lunch 💖

Thank you for this thread OP.

Sorry to hear about everyone's struggles, sending hugs to all ❤️

I'm going through hell at the minute, I've hit rock bottom and I don't see anyway back up. I've had a complete mental breakdown. I can't even bring myself to write what has happened, if I do, that will make it real.

Oh bless you @tiddlywinks2 , you can always PM me if you need an ear. I'm so sorry you are struggling so much 💔 😔

Thank you. That means so much.

I have no family or friends to lean on, so I really appreciate this. ❤️

Thanks OP, it’s nice to be able to get some stuff out in the open.
I found a lump in my breast last week and the Dr has referred me to the breast clinic (appointment next week) The logical part of my brain says “it’s more than likely not cancer” but the other bit says “Your grandma had it twice, your auntie had it at 50…so now it’s your turn”

I lay awake at night thinking how I’d tell my DC if it’s bad news. They already put up with me being in pain quite often due to a different issue and they’re so good. My DH is great but I don’t want to weigh him down with all my worry. I’d usually speak to my mum but she’s lost 3 of her closest friends this year and it’s been so hard on her that I just can’t bring myself to worry her about this too.
I feel like a burden and that’s the worst feeling ever 😢

Great idea for a thread
I worry about my youngest, my H only gives a shit about his work and has never been one for expressing emotion about anything and it's pointless trying to speak to him, tbh our marriage is pretty much over anyway.
My family are quite judgemental about everything and I couldn't speak to any of them. My friends have their own stuff going off.

I also have to put stuff in my phone calendar OP and repeat it every day until I've done it then I can tick it off!
Baby steps! I'm also procrastinating as well, laid in bed watching old soap re-runs when I should be doing housework!

Off work for the first time in years, aside from when I had covid, with anxiety, brain fog, low self esteem, inability to make any decision at all - all symptoms of the bloody menopause.
I despise being off work, I worry that others will have to pick up some of my work, I worry that I am not doing enough at home as well, I worry that I am a crap mum, I worry that I am a crap wife, basically I worry all day long, oh and night, cos who needs sleep??
I have a telephone appt this week with my GP and I am hoping that she will give me a sick note for the time I have had off - worrying seems to be my thing!
I am having a shit time at the minute and I am sorry that other people are too

I m still grieving my lovely dad who passed away in his sleep a year past July.
I live far from my parents and had a flight booked for a few days after. I was the last person he spoke to on the phone as mum was in hospital.
I next saw him in the funeral home. He was 79 and hadn't been ill except for previous strokes. They think he went to sleep and had a massive stroke.

I feel so guilty and sad I wasn't there. If he had held on another week I would have been and maybe could have done something. Called an ambulance? I can't get over it. We were so close.

My friend is hearing voices and talking about suicide. I know I should be helping but I m angry she says this and my dad didn't want to die (irrational I know. I have never told anyone).

I told her she needs to see a doctor and get help but she's so angry all the time I get all the abuse. I m tired trying to help.

I live with my adult son and he has got covid. At least that bit will sort itself out.

Thanks for letting me unburden myself sorry it s long.

I’m so worried as my daughter in law disclosed to me yesterday that my son has talked about taking his own life, he made a previous attempt some years ago. I’ve already lost a son, I just can’t bear the thought that he’s so unhappy.

@tiddlywinks2 you are very welcome 😊 I tried to PM you but it wouldn't work for some reason, so sorry 😢 Maybe it would be better if you sent me a message first?

Thank you for the thread OP. My partner died suddenly just over a year ago, we have a (now) 3 year old. It's really hard because a year down the line everyone else's life is back to normal but I am still grieving, I had a lot of support in the early days and can't continue to burden others with it in the same way. I cope, I am working and parenting, but it's still a massive hole in my life. I've put on nearly 3 stone comfort eating but not in a place to think about dieting right now.

My blessings are that my 3 year old is a lovely child, very sunny personality, and thank goodness I am reasonably financial comfortable, not having to choose between eating and heating at least.

My heart is breaking with all these replies.
We never really know what people are going through.
Most people are fighting battles that people can't see.
On top of the stresses of the current COL crisis.
I will reply to everyone when I get the chance.
I hope by writing it down here it helps to get it off your mind a tiny bit ♡

OK, so I'll start by saying that the last 7 years have been really hard. I had a head injury (mild traumatic brain injury) and post concussion syndrome in 2015 before being given lots of psychotropic drugs to help during a terrible mental breakdown after. Unfortunately I ended up having a very bad reaction to an antipsychotic drug that gave me a neurological involuntary movement disorder called tardive dyskinesia. It's kind of like a combination of Tourette's and Parkinson's disease but with more involuntary movements of my tongue, face etc.

I also had an awful time just after my 3rd baby was born in 2020, and the postnatal hormones seemed to trigger worse involuntary movements and a king of mini menopause type thing. I honestly don't think I've ever really recovered since then, and am constantly battling gingivitis, tinnitus, anxiety, brain fog etc. All while trying to look after 3 children 😅 🙃

I'm just going to get one of them a snack now so will be back soon 😄

I am fortunate enough not to (currently) have any issues to contribute, but just wanted to say what a lovely thread - although obviously the situations aren't, in themselves, in any way lovely.

No snark or nit-picking, no ridiculous hyperbole and drama, just some mutual support and handholds for people who are going through the shittest of shit times.

Sending good wishes to everyone who has posted and hope that you can all find the strength you need to get through and find some resolution.

Oh please can i join. Usual, marriage problems, money problems, work problems. When will it get easier? I feel like i am the rock in the middle that is everyone elses stability. Except noone seems to realise my foundations have been fractured.

I can't really talk to anyone in real life as a lot of it is quite shameful - my dh's actikns primarily and the fact i have decided to stay with him.

Well done @FreezyWater!!!

@cornishLassie couldn't read that without replying. Sounds like you are totally burnt out. Fuckers. Have you got a lawyer? You may have legal expenses on your home insurance. Don't forget the personal injury claim if their actions have damaged your health.

Get good representation for this early bit even if you self represent later on.

@MsPinkMarshmallow your post made me feel so sad for you. Have you told your dh how you feel?

I have had a child die, it was a few years ago and a lot of therapy helped me survive which I am exceptionally grateful for. It has left me with anxiety. I do understand all parents worry about their children but my DS has just started to train in his chosen career as a police officer. The interview process was long and it’s a full degree programme. Whilst he will make a good officer and is very morally upstanding with the utter contempt many people have for the police these days due to awful stories especially around the Met police force and the genuine danger dealing with criminals it’s leaving me very stressed out. He is also mixed race so I really worry about that aspect as well. He experienced racism at school and I wonder how that will play out as an officer.

@IfeelSickToDeath i'm so sorry. That sounds totally shit.

Single parent... Good job. I can afford my life and my sons but I wnat to scream.
I do everything, every childcare worry. Everthing.
Awaiting biopsy results, if its cancer I'll go under as I just can't do more or take a break as my son needs me.

His dad putting pressure to reconcile and I know it's as he needs a place to live as finally his lifestyles caught him out. Exhausting.

Also everyone on this thread I'm so sorry for your struggles xxx

thankyou op for the thread

i am really really struggling at the moment. single parent totally isolated no family or friends. recent job opportunity fell through freaking out about rising costs of everything literally no one to talk to don't want to be here but can't and won't leave kids but no one is there. reached out to a few friends they are busy or have too much to deal with on their own so not in a position to help me i just can't do it there is no hope joy no one to text me or ask me "are u ok" it is killer and i have never felt this bad in my life.