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Original poster

School want me to give DC double the amount of food for lunch?

250 replies

dreakdays · 29/09/2022 22:11

DC is 5 and has...

A cheese and onion/egg mayo sandwich

A cheese

Small pot of olives (I put these in, about 4/5 olives)

A peperami

A yogurt

A little cake bar, such as a banana soreen bar

His teacher has requested I double this, as apparently he's finishing his lunch and trying to steal other Children's food!

For breakfast he has peanut butter on toast (he won't eat anything else like porridge etc)

I really don't think it's necessary to double his food. I'd give things like veg etc or fruit but he won't eat it. It just won't get eaten and if I try to send it amongst everything else, the school tell me not to send it in as he doesn't like it

This is a special needs school but I'm a bit annoyed at having to double up on lunches

I think he's just trying to explore more stuff and needs to just be told no here...

OP posts:
35965a · 29/09/2022 22:13

Well maybe don’t actually double it but maybe he does need a bit more?

SudocremOnEverything · 29/09/2022 22:15

Give him an extra sandwich.

IwillShineOnYouLikeMorningStar · 29/09/2022 22:17

Could you put in a larger/extra sandwich, & a couple of pieces of fruit, to start with.

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Original poster
dreakdays · 29/09/2022 22:17

I suppose I could put in an extra sandwich

It's just such a huge lunch for a tiny 5 year old!

OP posts:
RagzRebooted · 29/09/2022 22:18

My teenagers have about that much, usually less. It's plenty, I think you're right and he's just trying it on. But you could add another sandwich and see how he goes.

FuriousFurious · 29/09/2022 22:19

Do you give him a full sandwich ie 2 lives of bread?
Is the yoghurt a full fat yoghurt?
Does he drink enough water?

FuriousFurious · 29/09/2022 22:19

2 slices of bread, not lives

FrancescaContini · 29/09/2022 22:20

dreakdays · 29/09/2022 22:17

I suppose I could put in an extra sandwich

It's just such a huge lunch for a tiny 5 year old!

But it obviously isn’t if he’s trying to eat other children’s food! Just give him more food - why are you doubting the teacher?

SleepingStandingUp · 29/09/2022 22:21

I think it's worth exploring if he's still hungry. And or thirty. Is he drinking enough?

You said its a special needs school, is he able to tell the teacher if he's hungry or just likes the look of someone else's yoghurt?

Putdownthecake · 29/09/2022 22:21

That's almost identical to what I give my 3 year old for nursery, except no olives. He also has a banana and crisp

escapingthecity · 29/09/2022 22:23

Is he stealing other kids' food because he wants more or because he wants something different?

SunnydayeverythingsAOK · 29/09/2022 22:25

My five year old goes through periods of being ravenous, can't eat enough. Then she grows an inch or 2, and goes back to being a picky eater who barely touches her food. Maybe he's just in a hungry, growth spurt stage? I also give my 2 year old more food than that for her nursery lunch as I'd rather she had too much than not enough. What about some crackers? Raisins? Rice cake?

Greensleeves · 29/09/2022 22:30

FrancescaContini · 29/09/2022 22:20

But it obviously isn’t if he’s trying to eat other children’s food! Just give him more food - why are you doubting the teacher?

Show quote history

"why are you doubting the teacher?"

Good lord, it's a teacher, not an omniscient deity. OP is much better placed to gauge her 5yo's dietary needs than a teacher who only knows him as one of a class, and hasn't known him for 5 years.

I'm an EY/KS1 teacher, and I wouldn't expect a parent to take my word as gospel, especially on something like this. The lunch OP is providing sounds more than adequate to me, but if he was mine I might try offering another sandwich in case it's a growth spurt. It's also possible that, as OP surmises, it's a sensory/impulse control issue and he needs guidance to behave appropriately and not grab things that aren't his. Pretty standard stuff for a 5yo with or without SEND.

SirenSays · 29/09/2022 22:33

I'd trial it for a few days. If he's eating it all and it stops him pinching other children's lunches then great! If not then talk to the teacher again.

EstellaRijnveld · 29/09/2022 22:34

He is still growing which is probably why he's hungry all the time. I'd give him more protein at breakfast such as a glass of milk with his peanut butter toast. Add a chopped up banana and that's a more substantial breakfast than just toast. Maybe give him a boiled or fried egg with toast another day & another sandwich or sausage roll at lunchtime.

ellieboolou · 29/09/2022 22:34

Olives, peperami and cheese are all very salty foods to have daily for that age, a larger sandwich and less of the snack type foods. Is it a little pot of yogurt? Maybe put 2? Does he eat pasta?

Original poster
dreakdays · 29/09/2022 22:35

escapingthecity · 29/09/2022 22:23

Is he stealing other kids' food because he wants more or because he wants something different?

There is no policy for what you put in their lunch bags so I would bet you any money he's spotting people with crisps and sweet stuff

His teacher did suggest 'a pack of monster munch or something' at first

Now she's saying I should double the lunch

OP posts:
bluebellcushion · 29/09/2022 22:37

If it's a SEN school, I'm wondering if taking other children's food is a communication of something else rather than assuming it's hunger? That seems a decent lunch to me!

As an aside, at our SEN school, all school meals are free (I thought that was the case for all SEN schools). If yours is too, can't they just offer him some of what's on the school menu?

Original poster
dreakdays · 29/09/2022 22:40

bluebellcushion · 29/09/2022 22:37

If it's a SEN school, I'm wondering if taking other children's food is a communication of something else rather than assuming it's hunger? That seems a decent lunch to me!

As an aside, at our SEN school, all school meals are free (I thought that was the case for all SEN schools). If yours is too, can't they just offer him some of what's on the school menu?

He's a little bugger - I've never had food issues with him at all until he started school. I sent him in on school dinners - he wouldn't touch them. He wanted what everyone else had, teacher told me most other kids were on packed lunch and they all ate at the same time in the same place

He kept refusing the dinners so I send in packed lunches and that's what he's happy with. But he just keeps trying to take other kids food and it is entirely impulse and because it's something sweet

I really do think they need to be more insistent that he can't just touch other peoples lunches. And with that, he has what he has and that's it

He can't communicate well or speak, so it just means constant repetition of taking him away from other peoples lunches

OP posts:
Discovereads · 29/09/2022 22:40

His breakfast may be too small. One slice toast with peanut butter isn’t enough in my experience. Try a bigger breakfast first.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 29/09/2022 22:41

That sounds like a huge amount for a 5yo already! Don't blame you for not wanting to double it. Is he getting enough protein to help him feel full? Or does he need something that takes longer to eat so that he doesn't get bored while the other children finish?

HollyJollyXmas57 · 29/09/2022 22:45

bluebellcushion · 29/09/2022 22:37

If it's a SEN school, I'm wondering if taking other children's food is a communication of something else rather than assuming it's hunger? That seems a decent lunch to me!

As an aside, at our SEN school, all school meals are free (I thought that was the case for all SEN schools). If yours is too, can't they just offer him some of what's on the school menu?

That’s not the case at all SEN schools. Iv never even heard of all lunches being free as it’s a SEN school.

My sons is £2.35 a day. It was £2 last year.

genuinelyaskingforafriend · 29/09/2022 22:45

Is sometime helping themselves to his food and hence he is still hungry?

Would be best all that amount snd still be hungry if he was given that on non school days?

ODFOx · 29/09/2022 22:45

Swap his yogurt for one with a biscuit/chocolatey corner. It is more interactive and takes longer to eat, or for a crème caramel or a pot of jelly.
There must be a sweet treat that will make him less envious of his friends but you are still prepared to offer?
Or a s there a WhatsApp group for you to make contact and discuss with the other Mums? Is he just being a little monkey or are others receiving mostly a 'treat lunch' because of intolerances or refusal?

cherish123 · 29/09/2022 22:46

That seems quite a lot. I would not double it. Is he hungry? Usually schools say parents give too much. I think the real issue is taking others' food. Talk to him about it. If he is hungry, could he have a school meal instead.