Trapped Toddler Parents: Surviving the summer

[Motherofmonsters]

Hi,

New thread for toddler support, ideas and general rants!

Oh no @Chocolatetrifle - hope it passes quickly and you don’t come down with it. Which Orchard games do you have? DD really likes the dotty dinosaur one we got her for Christmas and can just about manage to concentrate for the length of one game, I’d like to get her some more.

We’re ok. Sleep is horrendous still, I’m out of ideas really.

Back to usual routine of work/ childcare start of the week then groups etc. She loved the snow we had and wanted to make a ‘snow dinosaur’ - basically we made the worlds smallest snowman and then she stuck sticks all over it but that seemed to satisfy her. Had a good weekend - went to the bigger of the two parks near us on Saturday and had DD walk the whole way there and back. It’s a long walk and I’d hoped would really tore her out and make sleep better but it made no difference obviously! Yesterday we went into the city centre to see the Chinese New Year celebrations - started a disaster with DD saying it was too loud and she wanted to go home. But then I. The library there were various performances and craft activities which she loved, and we were able to watch the parade from the window which was quieter and she really enjoyed it in the end.

Oh no @Chocolatetrifle hope it’s not a bad run and that you don’t come down with it. The weather has been rubbish recently so we’ve been inside a lot too. Glad to hear preschool is going well.

@AliasGrape glad to hear you’ve had a good few days but sorry sleep is still a struggle. Hope it resolves soon.

I’m writing this whilst trapped by a sleeping DS2, he’s still cosleeping with us because he point blank refuses his own bed and he needs to be on one of us at all times so tonight it’s my turn. Sitting in a dark room makes me really sleepy. We haven’t done a lot, DH and I felt under the weather on Saturday so there was a lot of tv and we only managed a walk on Sunday. Feel like our TV use is getting out of control recently so need to restrict that again.

@AliasGrape here are some of the ones we have, the lotto type ones are great age 2 to 3, also the shopping list game is great, we've had that too. Can't find the box at the moment. We've got a post office set which is good for pretend play.
Last night we used bath crayons.
Mine are out of the toddler stage at 5 and 3 now but they still enjoy a lot of the simple games and puzzles.

@SuspiciousLampshade hope you both feel better. Try not to stress about the TV.
I used to a lot, especially in lock down with two under 3 at the time and I worried i relied on it but it's fine I if you find how much and what works for you.
We do however not allow YouTube anymore or the kids one because ds1 was getting obsessed with it. He hasn't had it since October. However he's now at the age where he is asking for a nintendo switch!!!!

Hello, how’s everyone doing? Are your DSs better @Chocolatetrifle? Hope you’re still healthy!

I just need to say that I love my children but man do they drive me crazy sometimes…they’re still very much mummy’s boys and refuse to let DH do anything, and this morning was a constant background of whining and complaining. DS1 still isn’t talking properly so trying to interpret him with DS2 hanging off my leg screaming is bloody hard. I know this period isn’t forever but that’s hard to remember when you’re in the thick of it!!

DH is working an early shift then off out with his brother tomorrow so I’m soloing pretty much the entire day and night and dreading it, I’ll be knackered! Even though I do most of the stuff anyway it’s still nice knowing I have a second pair of hands should I need them…

Hope everyone has a good and peaceful night.

@squishymamma I literally was just coming on to say the same thing, my children exhaust me, and one's been in school all day and the other in preschool for the morning! Then they reunite and make up for the lost hours. This morning we had tension at 6amand a stand off over the one box of frosties in the variety pack. They can squabble over anything.

I think it comes and goes in waves the awkwardness, depends on moods, sleep, growth spurts, illnesses etc. But yes, it's really hard. Hope the solo day goes OK tomorrow for you. Ds2 has a chesty cough again. Ds1 has started with the green bogeys today.

Hope everyone gets a decent sleep.

Hi everyone,

Sorry I keep disappearing, my days are just rushing around. Between DD starting nursery, DS doing random hours, DS therapy and now his tutor twice a week I'm shattered.

DD and DS also bicker over every little thing. They've both started saying its not fair the other one has... It's hard to get them to understand they both can't have the same thing all the time.
DD insists on winding DS up and then getting up set as he's then wound up and accidentally runs into her.

I love the orchard games, they all seem to be good.

Hope everyone is having a good day

Hi , I've had a bit of a mare since I last posted, ds2 has Slapped cheek virus and a chest infection, which luckily have got antibiotics for.

Ds1 pushed over his friend after school in the playground and his mum spoke to me the morning after we apologised at the scene saying her ds didn't want to go to school in case my ds1 pushed him. Was all quite civil but I was annoyed as I thought it had been dealt with the day before. I spoke to ds again after I picked him up and it turns out the friend tried to push my ds twice in the playgroundat break so I took some pleasure in pointing this out to the other mum yesterday. It didn't seem to have occurred to her that her little Angel could have possibly done something too. The joys of 5 year old boys.
I'm feeling meh, tired and due on but having lots of evening primrose oil to try to combat the pmt. Fed up.of endless tidying, mess and cold weather.

How is everyone feeling?

Sorry you're not feeling it @chocolatetrifle. I would be annoyed with the mum to, these things happen with 5year olds. They have a kerfuffle, make up and carry on playing. They all have their moments. I hope your DS2 is better soon, you've had a lot of sickness again.

I'm getting very fed up with the cold too, my hands have been like ice all day.

I've had a worky day, had to drive to our depot, 30mins away after dropping DD off, with DS to unload some pallets that were dropped outside. Much to his delight. Then when he went in, had to do some officey bits. I've found myself being the HR and finance manager which is fine apart from I don't know what I'm doing and there's no one else to train me.

Hello!

Uff what a time you’re having @Chocolatetrifle. Glad your DS2 has gotten some antibiotics, hope he gets well soon. Annoying about the mum, I agree that I’d also be a bit smug in pointing out her little angel isn’t so perfect…

@Motherofmonsters hope you figure out how to do HR and finance, I’d have no idea! Bet you’re doing a great job though.

We’re struggling with mid-night parties here at the moment. More precisely, DS1 comes into our room at around 2.30am every night and wants a cuddle and to be awake. He’s usually annoyed when we try to put him back to bed, even if we stay with him. DH was in his room from 3am onwards last night! And DS2 sometimes likes to join in and is crashing around giggling his head off, which would be cute if I wasn’t so exhausted!

Anyone got any suggestions of why this might be happening? He’s not hungry or thirsty, doesn’t seem particularly scared (though I may be wrong) and will usually only want me not DH. It’s tiring when you have a full time job in addition!

Its really chilly here too, just about to get into bed and have a laid back evening reading…

Hope everyone has uninterrupted sleep! (Ha ha like that is a reality)

Hello.

I’m sorry you’re having such a rotten time @Chocolatetrifle I really hope the illnesses pass quickly and that’s the last of them for you all for a long while!

Sounds like you’re dealing with a lot work wise @Motherofmonsters - is there any external training you could access to help? (I appreciate it might be a time and/or cost factor)

I hear you on sleep @squishymamma - hope you had a slightly better night last night.

We’re making very slow progress with DD’s sleep - it’s one step forward and two steps back but I feel like even though it’s far from great, we’re in an ever so slightly better place than we were last week (DH laughed when I said this and said ‘whatever makes you feel better’ but I do think it’s getting slightly easier haha).

I’m feeling a bit swamped by work too - I’m only officially doing 2 days but have agreed to an extra half day whilst we’re getting a particular project off the ground, but don’t have childcare for that time so I’m kind of scrabbling around to fit in what I can when I can - and then it ends up being far more than the agreed half day.

We have to go furniture shopping today as DH and I still have most of our clothes in bags and he’s working at the kitchen table since his desk collapsed. It’s just not practical having him there - I can’t cook or do crafty stuff with Dd, can’t put a wash on etc. So we’re braving the shops today but have to take DD with us as no other option and I’m dreading it quite frankly!

How did furniture shopping go @AliasGrape? Glad to hear you’re getting somewhere sleep wise, baby steps and all that.

Both my boys have come down with a fever today so we’ll see how sleep goes tonight. DH was also feeling rubbish today so everyone had a long nap in the middle of the day. Apart from me of course, I’ve just been cleaning and meal prepping and trying to get ahead on some stuff before the craziness of a new week…

So fed up of this constant barrage of illness and very ready for summer!!

I hope furniture shopping went well @AliasGrape.

Hopefully you'll have a good night sleep @squishymamma the illnesses seem relentless at the moment.

DD decided to wake up screaming last night at 11 last night, took her forever to settle and then she was up at 5. I am tired!
We went to my PIL for lunch and then FIL and DS went off to watch his uncle play football and I went with DD and MIL for a coffee.
Other than some epic falling outs from an over tired DS with DD it's been a successful day. Even managed to clean the shower

Furniture shopping was a nightmare as predicted and then we came home and just ordered what we wanted online anyway!

Sorry to hear about more illnesses for your boys @squishymamma. Hope everyone gets a decent sleep tonight - I was going to say we can dream right but actually we probably can’t if our toddlers have anything to do with it 🙈

Morning I think I've been awake since 3.45 this morning when ds2 woke up, luckily he went back to sleep. Ds1 again woke before 5 and refused to go back to sleep. I threatened to put his pokemon cards in the bin at half 5 as he was trying to get me up. I'm so pissed off with this disrupted sleep. I thought school would help him sleep better but it's all over the place again. 5 years in , still no full nights sleep. I'm going to bed literally as soon as they go asleep so have no evening.

Hope you are all feeling a bit better today Squishy.

Glad you got your furniture Alias Grape. And glad your day was OK too Motherherofmonsters, bit shame about your early start too.

Hope everyone has a good day.

I hate today already, got woken up by DS at 5.30 when he snuck in our room and kicked a glass of water over.

DD got up wanted dry hoops, then wanted milk in it. I put milk in them then she had a total meltdown as she wanted dry hoops. I gave in and gave her dry hoops, she ate one and said it was disgusting and she wanted milk in them.....

DD and DS then proceeded to run around shouting and falling out with each other. I lost my shit and then helped them pick out some toys to set up playsets with for quiet play. Ds then wanted bits from DD's and DD kept going na na na na at him resulting in more fighting.

It's only 9.15...

Sorry you've had a crappy sleep again @Chocolatetrifle early wake ups are a killer
Before kids I knew babies didn't sleep I never realised it carried on when they got older, DS and DD really showed me.

We've had a better few days here and managed to stay asleep until 6.20 today so that was much welcomed!

How is everyone feeling?

Glad to hear it’s been better today @Chocolatetrifle!

DS2 is apparently teething and not feeling like sleeping, I’ve been doing a lot of shouting already tonight so now we’ve come out to the living room and I’ve given up and am letting him play around until whatever time he crashes. He’s had Calpol so now he’s obviously feeling amazing.

@Motherofmonsters hope your day was better today, I can definitely relate!

Hello, how are you all?

We’re having a bit of a rubbish time at the moment. Last night DS2 screamed pretty much all night despite not being overtly sick or anything. Think it was more nightmares. And we’ve had a lot of illness with fevers and coughs and colds, and DS1 is becoming a proper threenager staging standoffs in the mornings because we only have TV after breakfast…

I’m knackered if I’m honest and it’s really putting pressure on my marriage. DH actually said to me this morning “why are you so angry all the time?” I could have cried. I’ve booked an appointment with the GP to see if they can do something with my mental health but seriously how do we even survive with a toddler and a threenager…

Just a rant really. DS1 was actually quite happy yesterday, he’s been getting really into beading with those Hama-esque beads and can spend a good hour on it, win win for us! He’s also coming along in his speech which makes life easier.

Hope everyone has a good day, I’m just working all day and hoping I go home in a better mood!

Hi @squishymamma I’m sorry to hear you’re having a hard time. Hope sleep was better the last few nights? I so empathise with you about the pressure on your marriage and feeling angry all the time.

I have something going on with my eyes/ eyelids - all red, sore, swollen and itchy. It’s been on and off quite a few weeks and not much seems to be helping - I’ve stopped using any products or make up so between that and the red, scaly eyes I look quite delightful. I’m also having a bad period and major IBS flare up. Generally I’m horrible to be around right now I think.

We’ve done bugger all this weekend. New bedroom furniture arrived Friday so I spent most of yesterday sorting stuff into it and getting rid of as much as possible. I think we need some more drawers as there’s still stuff I can’t find a home for, but it’s a definite improvement. DD was just kind of pottering downstairs, occasionally coming up to ‘help’. I took pity on her late afternoon - had to pick something up from the retail park near us and was planning to go alone but she’d been cooped up at home all day so took her with me for a babyccino in the Costa and then a look at the animals and fish in pets at home.

Today has been more of the same really but I’m going to make a supreme effort now to get her out for some fresh air even though all I really want to do is hide in bed till spring/ I stop feeling like shit.

Hope everyone else is having a cheerier weekend!

Illness and sleep deprivation is so hard, hugs to all of you going through it

We got out to the park today and the kids have had some moments of playing together happily. (But also several moments of whacking/shouting at each other!). I enjoyed the sunshine and even felt warm enough to take my scarf off 😊

Moving house soon so dreading the packing, though will be a good opportunity to cull some toys!

@AliasGrape oh no, how are your eyes feeling now? Have you got any ointment for them? Have you changed any make up remover?

Not much to report from here at the moment. I've had conjunctivitis and si usitos and a chesty cough so I'm a bit under the weather too.

How are you getting on with sleep @squishymamma ?

Goodxluck with thr House acking @Stayingstrongish.

Hi,

Hope your eye is better now @AliasGrape and that everything else has also passed. I think a babyccino is a perfect little outing and sometimes it’s fine to just not go out.

Glad to hear you’re doing alright @Stayingstrongish, when’s the big move? Packing is exhausting (we’ve moved 4 times in the past 7 years, as we were students pre-kids but lived in flats) but I agree it’s an easy way to become a bit more of a minimalist!

@Chocolatetrifle hope you're feeling better?

I haven’t posted as it’s all been a bit overwhelming recently, DS1 has gotten into the habit of waking up once a night at around 1.30am and requires lots of snuggles and gradual movement back into his own bed so whoever’s turn it is is done about 2/2.30am. And DS2 has taken to having parties in the middle of the night so he’s up from like 2-3am and then wide awake at 5am. Literally feel zombified.

Went to my doctors today and she was fab- took blood tests to rule anything hormonal/biological out and has booked me in in a few weeks to discuss results and possible tablets/therapy for my depression (or depression like symptoms, don’t know if it’s actual depression). The sun is also coming back so that’s helping. Feeling slightly more positive!

DS1 has entered proper threenager territory now though, constant battles and whining from morning to night. Today he was playing with his Hot Wheels and whined because it was doing what he wanted it to do, except it wasn’t, but I had no idea what he actually wanted so he ended up storming off. This is making me dread the actual teenage years!

Hope everyone is well!

Thanks for the sympathy guys. Eyes are still flakey and a bit sore but definitely better than they were.

Good luck with packing and preparing for the move @Stayingstrongish

Hope you’re feeling better now @Chocolatetrifle

@squishymamma Sorry to hear of your sleep battles, and that things feel a bit overwhelming. Glad that your doctor seems really on the ball and hopefully can point you in the direction of what might help - hurray for the sun returning both literally and metaphorically.

Standard week here - Well not totally as DD actually slept through for the first time in her 2.5 years on Monday night - went down about 8ish, woke at 7.20. When I woke up at 7 and realised the time/ that she’d not woken me before I actually panicked there was something wrong and had to resist the urge to rush in there and wake her. I did think maybe we’ve turned a corner but normal night waking service has been resumed, and indeed doubled down on, since.

I’m in bed already. Trying to decide if I can stay awake to watch an episode of something on my table or whether to just go to sleep now. It’s a thrilling life eh?