Stupidest bollockings you’ve had at work?

[TimeAtTheBar]

I got called into a meeting with my bosses boss yesterday to address a complaint from a member of my team that I had disappeared off for half an hour last weekend.

…I took just half an hour of my one hour paid break and left another manager in charge.

Apart from the fact I am SO DONE with this particular job, this could have easily been resolved without a face to face meeting which I found intimidating and overkill.

To make me feel better, tell me about your stupid or unfair bollockings please; because I am still raging about it a day later.

I had a bitch of a supervisor and a spineless boss. I got bollocked for putting too many dots at the end of an email.......... I was reprimanded by said spineless boss to only put a maximum of 3...

For solving a problem for a client.

I was leading the project, but one of the deliverables was designated to my manager. He kept delaying, saying that the client hadn't provided sufficient information (they had, and even if they hadn't, it was clearly the stage where we needed to present them/provide them with some ideas).

I worked a weekend coming up with a draft example to discuss to meet the deadline. The client loved it. It worked. Boss was not happy. Didn't want to show it to the wider group. Kept saying he'd deliver. Client were getting angsty. I suggested that we just show my idea to the group and use it as a straw man example if nothing else.

He flipped his lid. Told me under no circumstances was I to undermine him again, and that it was important that the client had something that had been "designed".

I mean, what did I do, shit it out on the loo?

He proceeded to make two more errors when producing the final version (errors that went out to 2000 users), when mine was meticulously checked, and the final design was 95% based on my ideas.

I worked at this baby equipment shop where the management was absolutely dire, my direct supervisor was about 21 and had no idea how to train people at all, she would "show" me how to do something by doing it in front of me incredibly fast, then rolling her eyes when I asked if I could write things down as I'd forget. I was trying to navigate a new computer ordering system, in a language not my native one, with no access to a dictionary/translator so I couldn't just automatically look down the list of options and know which was which, it was a bit of a nightmare, especially knowing if I made a mistake I was potentially leaving someone without a pram/car seat when their baby was born or causing the shop to have to store something huge, expensive, hard to shift and bulky if it was wrong. I was there one day when a wrong item came in for somebody to collect (not me that ordered it thank god!) and it was a total nightmare.

The customers all being heavily pregnant was really tricky to navigate as well. I absolutely loved the job but the slightest thing you got wrong had the potential to set someone off in tears which was really upsetting! My main gripe though was that they wouldn't train me in stuff, and then they'd want me to go and demo products which I kind of half knew how to use because I'd used a similar one with my own kids, and then I'd get shouted at for getting something wrong. Which - I kind of get what they meant, because it was important, but they should have actually trained me since it was important I was knowledgable. I felt like I was flying by the seat of my pants most of the time with absolutely no idea whether I was getting it right or not, there was rarely anyone to ask either because they kind of expected you to just figure it out. One of my colleagues who started at the same time as me was in tears in the toilets one day because they had told her she needs to be more confident and stop asking other staff members for advice - she said she knew nothing about car seats (no kids herself) and felt sick with worry that she might be telling someone something that could put their child in danger. I don't blame her!

I actually got pregnant and signed off because of COVID and I'm not going back!

Washing my hands after serving a customer (during covid I might add)
The sink was behind the tills so I turned around to wash my hands which were also sticky from leaking butcher meat. The customer complained I turned my back on her and didn't watch her exit the shop!
Another customer complained I wasn't very nice, but didn't say what I did, didn't give her name, or date and time of visit so CCTV could be checked. I got a verbal warning for those.
Also got 100% and a special mention in a mystery shopper report, but apparently that wasn't very good.

I also had a manager who sat opposite me. One day she spent an hour furiously typing whilst occasionally giving me the sly eye.
I then received the email which was a massive long rant about me borrowing one of her files, how important this file was, how she needed the information urgently. This had been cc’d to the senior manager.
So I walked over and pointed at the file. Sitting right by her hand where it had always been. I said ‘next time maybe ask?’
2 days later she gave me the file whilst she was sneaking out early and it needed completing urgently (she hadn’t touched it and missed the deadline anyway).

I ordered box files that weren't quite the shade of orange my boss had in mind. I left very soon afterwards and am now much more senior to her

I wouldn't reprimand, but she's right!

I once got told by a report of mine that I use too many exclamation marks and they can come across as agressive. She was right too and I am very careful with them (at work) now.

Years ago I got told off by the office manager because one of the company directors had asked me to photocopy something,and I did it.

Apparently I should have asked her to do it,as she was superior to me and I shouldn't be dealing with the higher echelons of the company,that was her job.

I danced around the bloody car park the day I was made redundant from that place.

I got a bollocking for asking if I could say no to a colleague when she demanded that I do her work despite my own heavy workload.

I also got a bollocking for saying no to the same colleague despite being reassured it was ok and wouldn’t upset anyone

I left after that.

I got an out of hours text from my manager complaining my desk wasn't tidy. I told them that clearly wasn't a reason to be contacting me once I'd left work and that if they had an issue they could raise it in the appropriate manner at the appropriate time.

The next day they tried. Turned out the 'untidiness' was some printed off work someone had put on my desk ready for the next day.

Obviously then they changed tact and my 'attitude' became the issue...

There was some tension for a while. I never got an apology. But the powers that be gave me a massive pay rise not long after. Strange place.

I got told to sit on a cushion in zoom meetings as I am too short and a customer had complained that it was 'disturbing'

I was told off for playing Tetris at work. Quite right too you may think.

At the meeting we discussed how I had previously raised that I did not have enough work and I was meeting my objectives and more. We concluded that I could continue to play Tetris at work.

As a student, I had a part time job working in an office. I enjoyed the work and this was in the days before I turned into a fat misanthrope so I was basically young, single, attractive and personable working in what was mostly quite a young and dynamic company. My manager, on the other hand, was a rather grumpy older man.

One day, he called me into his office to furiously berate me about my clothes. It wasn’t that they were revealing or scruffy, it was that they were too brightly coloured and too fashionable (god knows how he knew). Also, my hair. I had long red hair and he didn’t like that. My hair was too…too…just too.

Sounds like you just didn't like reporting in to a teenager tbf

That apparently I told someone to throw out impressions 🥱. The said person was an absolute nightmare anyway. Never took responsibility for what she done and was so so shite at her job. She actually come to me and asked me what to do with the impressions they no longer needed/patients didn't take home. I mean, she should've known anyway but I told her in the gypsum waste. Can't go in normal waste.

Next thing dentist comes screams her head off at me for 'throwing it away' and I said maybe you want to ask your lying manipulative two faced nurse what she really asked. I also told her not to talk to me until she apologies. The truth soon come out. Meanwhile the dentist I work with was also in my corner and said to the other dentist just how much of a liar her nurse was 🤣.

We got told to submit feedback on what management could do better in and it would remain anonymous. It wasn't, and we got pulled up and into trouble 🤣 I could write a book about my previous employer.

After 3 months of therapy I left and got a wonderful, better paying job 🤣🙌

I was bollocked when working at an international school for my ‘terrible spelling’ on end of year reports. Except my spelling was perfect… I had written in British English (my native language and the official language of the school) whereas the management had their computers set to American English.

We had one of these - run by an external company asked about how management and the board could improve then loads of people got pulled into the CEO's office to explain themselves!

Then the next year we all got a bollocking because not enough staff answered that questionnaire.

They started sending out comms to everyone during covid written by the CEO that ended up being racist, sexist and all round offensive. Anyone who spoke up was told that maybe the culture wasn't right for them. It was insane.

I got told I'd have been perfect for a promotion if I wasn't pregnant - then got made redundant almost immediately after returning from maternity leave.
The decision was made by a 'manager'
I'd never met and didn't involve anyone I'd ever worked with.

There was a team of 4 of us in the exact same role and none of the others had children. The women weren't of childbearing age. No prizes for guessing what happened there.

"I've had a complaint about the tone of your emails, Slagatha."

"Really? But I'm always polite, say please and thank you, make an effort yo be nice. I don't want to upset anyone, what did I do so I can avoid doing it again?"

"I can't tell you what you did. I can't tell you who has complained. Don't try to figure it out. It's someone important. They didn't like your tone. No, I can't give you any more details."

She wasn't popular amongst the team. She liked to mess with people's heads and stretch the truth quite a bit. More importantly, I hope my paragraphs have worked, they don't tend to on the app...

Took me a second to realise she wasn't calling you Slagatha as an insult 😭😭

Once when i'd not been off from this company ever, i had heart attack on shift, went straight to hospital come back to work and got handed a disciplinary letter and a final warning put on my file for a year.

Also another company sacked me because i couldnt work another womans shift on my sunday off, because id made plans.

Theres loads more things that have happened, but there the 2 that spring to mind.

I got a disciplinary and a final written warning ( 20 years of nothing before this - not even the suggestion of any other kind of serious trouble ) in the presence of my boss and the woman from the mentor service they used…
My crime? I’d gone racing on a college week and not asked work if I could have the day off to go.

when I knew a horse I was involved with was running ( Royal Ascot, so not some tinpot seller on a Monday somewhere!) and I realised I would be at college that week, I checked my timetable and asked college if I could have the day off and catch up later. They agreed on the grounds that I had already passed the exam the morning’s lectures were on, and the afternoon was two hours of practical practice that could easily be made up another time. it never crossed my mind to ask/mention it at work because I wasn’t meant to be there anyway so the week was already covered by our amazing holiday cover nurse.

I shared my location on Facebook and said how excited I was to be there - that was seen by the head nurse who told one of the partners, who then told the senior partner and it all became totally blown up ridiculousness. I was already working my notice - which was his excuse for giving me a final written warning - but me laughing as he tried to get his head round me pointing out that he was wrong and the practice was fully staffed regardless of where I was - I really didn’t think I needed to ask them as well as check with where I was actually supposed to be ( who I HAD asked and had approved it !) and if I was going to be sneaky about it the LAST thing I’d have done was tag myself at the racecourse… 🙄🙄🙄🙄

I couldn’t be bothered to follow it up with regard to the final warning ( nothing that happened was remotely near being worthy of that !) but I probably should have done.

and yes - every year it appears on my Facebook I share the post with a caption along the lines of “should I be somewhere? Have I asked permission? Who knows…” because I’m that pissed off and petty 🤣🤣🤣

Oh yeah and someone formally complained to HR that my shoulder being exposed was promiscuous.

I had to apologise and promise that my shoulders were covered at all times (it was just a slightly baggy maternity jumper with a vest top underneath)

Along time ago now, but I worked as a live in nanny.
On my night off a friend asked me to go into town with her for drinks, so I left the car at home and walked in, so I could have a couple of drinks and walk back again.

While out we got chatting to a couple of guys (we were single girls at the time), and they bought us a drink.
Unfortunately mine was spiked and I had an extremely bad rection to that and ended up in hospital. Fortunately my friend hadn't actually drank hers and she realised what had happened.

They took blood and urine samples, and confirmed I had been drugged, but also confirmed I was under the legal limit to have driven (I think to rule out that I wasn't blind drunk when brought in).

The family I worked for were contacted by my worried friend. They came and collected me.

The next day I got a lecture on drink driving and was fired.
(to reiterate - I didn't have the car with me. I wasn't drunk by any means, the only thing that was my fault was accepting a drink from a guy).

My then manager putting me on a disciplinary for saying that if I won the lottery, you wouldn't see me for dust.
It didn't show loyalty to the job! Once my union rep had finished laughing, the matter was dropped.

Another manager who questioned why I was late to work one day. I explained that I had found a man laying on the road ( a hit and run victim ) and after ringing for an ambulance I had stayed with him until they arrived.
I was told that I should have ignored him, it wasn't my problem!
This was an NHS manager!!