What's the funniest thing you have ever read on MN?

[Noglassjustthebottleandastraw]

A few weeks ago there was a thread that was really funny. I literally couldn't move for laughing at one of the comments. Think it was something like "did you smash your tits on the keyboard and press send" most days since, this comment has popped into my mind and made me laugh so much.

So who ever posted that comment thanks so much 💐

What's the funniest thing you have ever read on MN?

It's the Sistine Chapel thread for me too I'm afraid. I don't care if it's made up, it had me crying with laughter.

Which is the zombie thread about the woman getting the new carpet fitted and it kept popping up year after year?

I must be tired as I can't actually work out what the doctor was actually requesting. I thought you were going to say she put the baby down and put her hand on the doctor's head and her other hand on his tummy.

A tear just rolled down my cheek trading this thread, the bit where people wanted to go home sick 😂

Just read half of the Sistine chapel thread. I can totally see why it's in classics. I thought it was funny and a laugh up until the Pikachu comment, that ended me.

Looking forward to reading the replies on here after work.

@AppleHa Oh god, I've never used that username and wasn't on MN then but I could have written that myself. Except my cat was very patient, loves a cuddle and didn't mind, fortunately! Either that or we had to play dentists to get DD's teeth done.

My favourite post was the one where a tired new mum brought her baby to the doctor, he asked her to put one hand on the his head and the other hand on his tummy. So she put the posed the baby with one hand on his head and his other hand on his little tummy. "Not the baby,YOU" The Dr dryly replied.

This makes me laugh and go Aaaaaah every time I think of it. Would have made an adorable photo!

Does anyone remember ‘His little shirt’? The original subject wasn’t that funny - the woman had picked up a shirt in a smaller size for her husband, sent him a text saying ‘I picked up your little shirt’ and his friends took the piss. What made it funny was that there was this whole mad cast of characters involved. She said ‘I asked the Dawn Doctor about it at work’ and everyone was completely confused about what a ‘Dawn doctor’ was. OP kept getting frustrated and saying it wasn’t the point, and eventually said ‘She’s just a doctor who looks like Dawn!! I call her the Dawn Doctor like you’d call a nurse who looked like Sadie the Sadie Nurse!’

Another favourite was the woman whose in-laws had actively told her and her husband not to come over when their friends were visiting, but they’d gone anyway just because they wanted to and, when they weren’t offered a drink, she started ‘making eyes’ at the champagne and couldn’t get what she’d done wrong. What made it funnier was that, amongst the mostly sensible replies telling her she was crackers, one poster went on this mad tirade in her defence, saying she’d been absolutely right to ‘overrule the parents’ 😆

Another favourite (although I think it was eventually deleted) was the woman who’d given all her friends a telling off because of some infraction and then claimed that one of them had later admitted that ‘I’d utterly destroyed them intellectually, to the point that one of them had had to go outside to vomit’🤮 😆

This, exactly. I still read the 'fashion aspiration v reality' and 'stupid people on Tripadvisor' threads now when I need a laugh. "Is that you Paul?" about the spray painted pigeon was another good one. But penis beaker and 'snapped and farted' just leave me cold.

Still the quern fer me

This sentence, on a current thread:

"We went to the Sistine Chappell the day after and I ended up screaming at the MichaelAngelo"

I forgot the woman who’d sent pizzas and a bunch of flowers into her daughter’s school to ‘make her feel special’ on her 16th birthday and got mad because the office didn’t send anyone to find her daughter and the pizzas went cold - plus, her daughter wasn’t allowed the flowers until the end of the day instead of being allowed to carry them around in her tote bag so that ‘everyone would see and she’d feel special all day’ 😆

Again, one of the funniest parts was one of the few posters defending her, who suggested this was why we were falling behind America and, bizarrely, why teenage boys from working class families do badly at school (?!)

There was one years ago where a mum discussed her child's compulsive overeating. It sounded pretty bad. The child would take food from cupboards and fridges and lots of it, it was making him ill and breaking the household budget. IIRC the final description was of the child having eaten an entire block of cheddar and then denying it even though he was surrounded by crumbs and the wrapper and he had cheese bulging out of his mouth. The post concluded "should I put a lock on the fridge?' It seemed such an incongruous end to a post about a serious issue! I cannot remember the last time I laughed so hard.

Oh loads of these but especially ‘is my fridge Jewish?’

Oh my goodness this was the best ever! You’re right she originally posted asking for reviews on a certain brand of pushchair, nobody replied and then a few years later she replied to herself without realising she was the one who asked the question in the first place until another poster came along and said ‘you do know you’ve just replied to yourself!’

Hilarious! Thank you to the OP of that one, it’s cheered me up many times!

For me, it was the poster who recounted a family dinner out. Small child DS was having trouble cutting up his potato, and eventually asked his grandmother, 'Could you help me with my potato, Nanny? It's being a right cunt.' Cue stunned silence from the table, except I think for the brother-in-law who found it absolutely hilarious.

I've tried to go back and find that post a few times over the years and have never succeeded, so if anyone knows where it is I'd much appreciate a link so I can laugh till I cry all over again!

Can't remember what the thread was about, but the OP 'turned and urinated in her chair' or similar, have no idea what she was trying to say!

Sex Bear House Must be ten years ago now but it still makes me laugh.

There was one where the poster was in bed with a new bloke who went down on her and at one point their eyes met and she waved, cracks me up even now!

Thank you to the person who linked the "genius IT guy" thread, it's given me another huge laugh this morning!

The supersoaker thread was amazing for me. Astounding bonkerdom.

Also, don't think anyone's mentioned it yet - the one where the poster didn't know how to get rid of her old sex toys. The whole thread was funny but the one response that really sent me was "pop them in a jiffy bag and post them to Putin." This is now a standard response in my house to "where should I put X" 🤣

Oh and the one where someone was asking about cleanup after sex! (Sorry all my faves seem to be NSFW 🤣) People saying they incinerate the sheets, roll around in Febreze, only ever have sex in a haz-mat suit etc.

😂😂😂😂

I loved the French cheese-slice-ejecting poltergeist fridge one. “Fridge: Je ne regrette rien” still has me snorting with laughter

So many of these (the Easter bonnet one! the booble plate! fat balls!).
Also, mum and kid on top of the bus, kid says "Look it's the pub!" in great excitement, then "Oh no, it's closed!" There were so many great posts on that thread, I think it was one where people posted things their kids had written in the school diaries too, it was absolutely hilarious.

I will never forget the Poo Knife

Someone asked about trivial reasons why there was no second date and one of the reasons given was that her first date had turned up in a huge old cream Merc ‘the type Sadam Hussain would have been driven about in’ and it makes me laugh every single time it pops into my head. It’s making me laugh just typing it 😆

This thread always has me crying

www.mumsnet.com/talk/baby_names/3124765-long-name-for-hugo

Hugofirst 😂