Your favourite funny line from TV or film

[ChinBristles]

After much consideration, the one I quote the most is Sheldon from Big Bang Theory: "Saturday night is laundry night". It just so covers me when I'm introverting on the weekend.

I'm guessing "Pivot!" may be a popular choice!

Only fools and horses so many really

Del falls through the bar not for me it’s even funnier cos of Trigger’s reaction.

Del meets his ex Pauline - she tells Del her latest husband is down the Blackshaw Road

del: in the council flats

pauline: no in the cemetery

make me laugh mainly because that’s where my step dad is now and it’s like a little reference to him - mad I know as it was written a long time before he died

In the Hammerbarn episode of Bluey (don’t @ me, it’s the best show on tv!) Bluey & Bingo are arguing over who gets to play with the items Chilli is putting in the trolley. They’re bickering back and forth and one of their husbands (garden gnomes) gets broken. Chilli responds ‘This is what happens when you are not happy with what you have! Someone's husband eventually gets it!’

makes me cry laughing every single time.

In Friends when Ross is talking about how he hasn't had sex in ages but it's made him appreciate other things like birdsong and the colour of the sky.

And then Joey replies with
'The sky's blue Ross, and I had sex yesterday'.

It makes me laugh every time! There is probably loads more from Friends as well!

"Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me"

Michael Gary Scott: The Office

My favourite one ever was in Motherland when Amanda was trying to put Anne down and asked what she did before having her children and she replied I was a production development designer for Glaxo Kline Europe. 😀

Don't tell him Pike! That's one for the oldies.

Glen describing Nicola whilst panicking as looking “like a squirrel caught in a peddle bin” in The Thick of It.

And so many from Victoria Wood - “If her bum was a bungalow, she’d never get a mortgage on it” 😂

DD(10) was watching Dinnerladies the other day and Bren’s description of Sunday afternoon TV (Pinky & Perky, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, and Dr Kildare’ Case Book) as “two pigs, a submarine, and twenty Scotsmen with emphysema” nearly had her not breathing for about a minute.

Dinnerladies, when discussing Christmas Day plans:

Dolly: honestly, who has sex on Christmas morning?!
Twink: the Dalai Lama
Dolly: well he must do his sprouts the night before.

Wheb Ricky Geraise's charcuterie (Andy) in after life is trying to scatter his father's ashes inside the pub where his dad proposed to his mother and the landlord tells him he can't do that. After an argument about it Andy throws the ashes at the guy who gets a little in his mouth. 'I hope.that but was his 'c*k you stupid c*t'. Very vulgar but literally made me laugh so hard.
I think it was because it was such a poignant scene that it was just comic relief. Is humour is not for everyone though.

'I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?'

Robert de Niro to Ben Stiller in Meet The Parents. What a great film and follow-up!😆

Captain Flashart: Have you ever felt the wind through your hair?
Blackadder: No
Flashart <feet resting on an all-fours Baldrick, farts long and hard>: He has!

Don't tell him, Pike! Is an absolute classic 😆

The legendary Morecambe and Wise sketch with Andre Previn. Previn reasonably accuses Eric of playing all the wrong notes to which he responds
“I’m playing all the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order.”

He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy. Life of Brian

Blimey, this crack’s a bit moreish.

“Tactical wee” from Bluey is used a lot in this house!

Hot Fuzz is the most quotable movie of all time. Regularly used in this house are:

Morning Angle (acceptable greeting to anyone)
I’m not made of eyes (when asked where a particular item is)
He’s auntie Jackie’s sister’s brother’s boy (when asked who someone is)

He’s been a very naughty boy!
welease woger
blessed are the cheesemakers
Life of Brian has too many to mention 🤣

Anne in Dinnerladies: can you smell my Charlie? <referring to her perfume> gets quoted a lot in our house! Dinnerladies quotes are always great.

There was a Victoria Wood short film, can't remember what it was called, sadly. It had VW as an average woman, a bit mousey, looking for her long lost sister on an Oprah-type show, who turns out to be Julie Walters, a glam TV star. Julie Walters is described as 'a heat-seeking missile, in slingbacks' and it goes through my head every time I see those types of shoes! It's a great line.

Lieutenant Georgee* : Oh, sir, if we should happen to tread on a mine, what do we do?
Captain Blackadderr* : Well, normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump up 200 feet into the air and scatter yourself over a wide area.



That's what she said.

“ BORING!” Killing Eve! Absolute howler!

"Barely American.. ??? You poncy schoolboy..
For 25 years people have being trying to kill me.. people who know how...

Do you think that's because I'm the son of a Greek Soda pop maker or the fact we can speak the language of people we're fucking spying on !!! Fuck yourself you fucking child.."

(smashes his bosses office window - the one that's just been repaired after their last 'discussion' )

The incomparable Philip Seymour Hoffman (spy) to his CIA boss

Charlie Wilson's war ... (the best film ever made by the way )

Another from friends,
Chandler: tell Joey that's how they measure pants.
Ross: yes it is. IN PRISON!

"Infamy, infamy, they've all got it in for me" – Julius Caesar (Kenneth Williams) in Carry on Cleo. Another one for the oldies!

'No, we're not fucking doing Stonehenge!'