I’m going to a Catholic Church on Sunday. Is there anything I need to be aware of?

[TheLightSideOfTheMoon]

Support Worker, taking one of my peeps for the first time.

I’ve not been into a Catholic Church before and don’t want to offend anyone or make any faux pas.

Is there a dress code? Anything else I need to be aware of?

Thank you!

I’m quite sure I made mine up because I couldn’t think of anything and panicked

Same for us. No handshakes (yay). Our church had got really into handholding along and between the pews during the Our Father before COVID. Fingers crossed that is gone for good!

We all made them up. The teacher gave some examples and we just used them. Lying about your sins to the priest was probably a sin too. Venial I'd say though. Hardly a mortal one.

In case anyone is interested, a venial sin is a little one that doesn't result in eternal damnation if you die without confessing. You would just have to do your time in purgatory. A mortal sin is a grave sin. If you die without confessing it, it's an eternity in hell. The great thing about Catholicism is you can get forgiven for any sin.

Disclaimer: church teaching on sin may have changed since my days of indoctrination.

I have been to many different Catholic churches almost every week of my life and I have never seen anyone cover their hair, it is just not a thing in this country. Wear whatever you like, I'm sure you will know what is inappropriate. Just copy whatever anyone else does, maybe don't sit too near the front! Arrive 5-10 mins early. There will be a collection halfway through, either take some change or just wave the plate/bag away, it won't matter. You don't need to kneel, sitting is fine, plenty of people don't kneel for health reasons. And like PP have said, don't take the bread or wine (don't suppose anyone is doing wine at the moment) but it's fine for you to take your charge up for it. Just whisper no thanks or something to the priest/minister or ask for a blessing, no one will bat an eyelid. No need to genuflect or cross yourself etc. Lots of non Catholic spouses go all the time, we're used to non Catholics being there.

I've been to church a lot - Catholic (work reasons) and Anglican. Communion happens at all of them!! The body and blood of Christ bit of the Bible is pretty important to believers!!! The sign of the peace is also not just a Catholic thing.

OP it'll be fine, you don't have to make the sign of the cross, or kneel, or take communion.

90 minutes! Your priest is doing it wrong. 48 minutes is the average!

Catholic masses are very structured and allow for very little faffing, which is great.

You’ll be there forever and there’s a lot of standing up to sing then sitting back down again. No dress code but most dress smartly.

Take some change for the collection (unless you don't want to obv but I always forget and end up scrambling in my purse and hoping for the best).

I'm a Catholic but only go to church every now and then.

Yes the church I attended as a child was very well organised, the offetry people wore a red sash and had a timetable when they were due to do the offetry like wise the ministers of the Eucharist wore a white sash and had a similar timetable ,my Dad set up direct debit for his monthly contribution ,it was optional, he joked he should get a sash emblazoned with Natwest on it🤣

Yes. I usually said things like :-

I was bold for my Mammy and didn't do what she told me
I was fighting with my brothers and sisters
I said a bad word

I'm not sure that they're all sins but sure, you couldn't just go in and say nothing 😀.

My mum used to do a Novena for us when taking important exams

I think every one said set things
I was disobedient
I told a lie
I took the Lords name in vain etc
There were two priests at the church I went to the younger one was lovely and always said well done and gave you a couple of hsil Mary's
But the older used to ask if we were sure we were finished did we not have any more sins 😇
Nobody liked going to him for confession

I feel some of this advice is based on people who haven't been to a Catholic church. In 20 odd years of church going and Catholic school I haven't come across some of the rules some of this thread is saying!

You're there to do a job, as long as you are respectful, don't start a conga line to communion, it's fine.
Wear what you would wear normally, don't feel you have to give money, it's not your religion after all, you can also respectfully stayed seated if you don't want to be fully involved with the mass and the sitting, kneeling etc, if you accompany them up to communion, just stand by their side or slightly behind the person you're taking up, don't put your hands out (or open your mouth!) and it will be obvious, or shake head no, then when they've got it, just move on with them.

You're there helping someone to continue their worship, anyone giving you sideeye or whatever needs to focus thay energy on themselves.

The collection with cash seems a bit 'old fashioned' now with the move towards cashless. Maybe they just need someone with a card machine at the entrance where you can make your donations.

I've only been to some Catholic funerals and weddings - seem to remember a lot of incense being used.

Incense is only used for funerals, not weddings. And yes, lots of it. I hate it, it gives me a headache. Only really a problem though if you're up the front.

@cakeorwine
As I mentioned up thread in our church there is no collection but you can tap to donate.

Wanted to ask on this thread, we’re going to a catholic christening. Are we ok sitting at the back wearing masks (not god parents/close family) or are we going to be perceived as strange for still needing to wear masks in enclosed spaces?

We are still in a pandemic I'm not sure why it would be an issue wearing masks?
I was at my cousins sons ,Cof E christening a few months ago some people wore masks some didn't

@TurquoiseSwirl You are no more or less likely to be ‘perceived as strange’ for still wearing masks in a Catholic church than you would be in any other non-healthcare setting.

Also, the term ‘baptism’ is used in Catholicism rather than ‘christening’.

Not since covid

Clearly depends on the place.
We've been back to shaking hands since mid 2021.
Incense only used on special days in the calendar here (apart from funerals obvs)

DD told me that her confession was that when she was little she used to suck the sweet bit off my tic-tacs and then put the mints back in the box. Hilarity all round, the priest had been one of my students when a whippersnapper, he's a papal nuncio now.

Some mad stuff on here. A lot depends on the church and it's location. My mothers parish church is very no frills and a super quick mass in and out in 35 mins max. My parish sometimes has a children's choir so more stuff happening also a bit of a more well to do area and a big mass going community so more charity events happening and more volunteers helping out in church. So a different vibe. We go to an older city centre church for masses for my in-laws occasionally . Very traditional lots of statues and side areas etc. Has a much more religious feel to the whole thing. People sometimes stay behind for extra prayers or rosaries and always lots of candle lighting. My point being that the basic mass will be the same but the churches themselves are all different so no one on here can say definitely that there will be a projector screen or helpers at the door or whatever. Also people wear whatever they want. There are no rules about bare legs or shoulders or anything like that(well there may be rules but no one is particularly bothered by them). I've seen crop tops and micro minis at masses.
Op let us know how you get on.

How did you get on OP?

@OchonAgusOchonOh you don't want to be at any mass I'm doing Thurible then. The more smoke the better. 😄