I’m going to a Catholic Church on Sunday. Is there anything I need to be aware of?

[TheLightSideOfTheMoon]

Support Worker, taking one of my peeps for the first time.

I’ve not been into a Catholic Church before and don’t want to offend anyone or make any faux pas.

Is there a dress code? Anything else I need to be aware of?

Thank you!

Oh, there are two collections. One is for the upkeep of the parish (paying the electricity, secretary etc). One is paying the salary of the priest. Pay a little, pay a lot or pay nothing.

You don't need to kneel or stand with others but you might feel a bit awkward sitting when everyone else is standing. Sitting while others kneel is absolutely fine.

Just don't put money in and take change out like Aunt Sarah in Derry Girls

Ours is still mask mandated. During ‘peace be with you’ nod to your neighbours - don’t shake hands (this hasn’t resumed for us since Covid). Take some money for the collection.

PuppyMonkey At my church the awkward handshake has become an awkward handwave/nod since Covid.

Don't worry about a headscarf, no one even wore a headscarf at my elderly nonnas funeral in Italy.

It probably won't be 90mins, ours is usually just over an hour with singing, or 45mins without.

I'm Catholic (Irish living in the UK) and have never heard of any expectation that women cover their heads. I think maybe it was a thing in some southern European countries make in the mists of time, but I really wouldn't give it a thought.

Likewise I really really wouldn't feel obliged to put anything in the collection, or do anything you wouldn't feel 100% comfortable with. You are there to support someone else in their worship, which is lovely and will be appreciated in any half decent parish.

Churches of all denominations are supposed to be there to welcome everyone. Just roll up with no boobs or knickers showing and go with the flow. If you get something "wrong" it is simply irrelevant - and if anyone minds then it is they that should not be there!

Well done for taking this on.

My home has been on silent for at least five years…

Also re clothes, again don't worry. I've been to Mass in plenty of churches where the 'dress code' ran the full range from flowery-hat-and-pearls to very-obviously-homeless. Admittedly turning up in nothing but a thong and 'God is dead' t-shirt might attract some attention, but that's it really.

I have never ever seen anyone cover their hair in a catholic church in Ireland or England.

If you sit while others kneel that's absolutely fine but lean forward a little bit so the person behind has room.

No obligation to make a donation at all.

I'm so glad Peace Be With you is now a nod, I always hated it!

Don't sit right at the front, you want to be far enough back that you have a clear idea of what people are doing! And relax , church is usually a welcoming place!

Honestly you don't need to do half of these things. I'm not Catholic but go to a lot of Catholic services. I'm just respectful but don't join in.

I'm not a catholic but have to go occasionally (catholic in-laws) I just sit and think about other things until it's over 😉

No need for headscarf.
Normal clothes are fine.
Copy what others do.
Ask your person if they wish to receive communion before you go. If they do, watch how others go forward - it could be two lines with priest and eucharistic minister standing at the front, or in some churches people kneel or stand along the altar rails, priest comes along distributes communion and when the person has received they return to their seat. You'll see what happens once you are there.
If your person has mobility issues you can maybe mention that to the people welcoming at the door (there is usually someone on the door at UK Catholic churches). Priests often come down into the congregation first to give communion to those who are less mobile.

Communion is sometimes under both kinds - bread and wine. Usually you can just bypass the wine if you don't wish to take it. There's normally a person standing to the side with the chalice and you would go there after receiving the host. If your person doesn't want to or can't take the wine, just move past it and back to seat.

You can just shake your head if offered host or chalice. Priests and eucharistic ministers are very used to people coming who cannot or do not wish to receive communion for whatever reason. It really isn't a big deal anymore.

I am not a Catholic and have attended church a few times for various things. I agree with what others have said but the other difference I noted is just you are more involved than in other churches.

Sometimes there are standard responses from the congregation to the priest. These have always been on the booklet handed out as you enter. Stuff like "and with you" or "amen". Lots of standing, sitting, kneeling.

The first time I went the peace be with you handshakes caught me out too but I quite like that bit.

I never go up for a blessing as feels wrong to me and never had bad looks or anything for not doing it.

Basically copy people and you will be fine.

Here you are - all you need to know!

Stand and sit when everyone else does, maybe sit towards the back or middle so you aren't at the front and there is no one to copy!
Bit of change for the person you are bringing to throw in the collection.
Communion just follow the others to the queue you don't have to get up yourself if the person you are bring is capable of going themselves or maybe they won't want to go, sometimes I don't.
If the person is struggling to keep quiet or losing concentration communion time is a good time to leave, its about 15 min before the end. Everyone is moving around at this time so not to obvious if you leave sometimes if the kids were struggling to keep quiet I would leave at this time

Oh my goodness, from some of these replies, you'd think you were going to a private audience with the Pope! I appreciate the OP's question, very valid, but some of the responses are likely to increase any anxiety, not assuage it. No need for any hair covering and no need to behave in any particular way other than treating your surroundings and the congregation with respect i.e. phone on silent, and as quiet as you can be. We're Catholics, not aliens, and we even move around you in normal society - you might not even know we're standing next to you in the supermarket queue! What PPs have said about communion/blessings is right, and there will probably be a collection, during or after Mass or both, so bring some change if you want to give some (no-one will bat an eyelid if you don't). I have been to Mass every week of my 41 years, and go every week now with my atheist husband, and our toddler and baby. My husband does not genuflect or kneel, and nor would I or the priest expect him to, and my children make a racket some of the time. The whole point is that everyone should be welcome, and if anyone ever said anything to me about my children crying or playing up, I would remind them that that is an attitude utterly at odds with the ethos of Catholicism. Jesus would prefer his house filled with noisy, innocent little children or people with disabilities than pious adults every single time.

In my defence, my only point of reference is the cathedral in Assisi, where I was required to cover my shoulders and hair, so...

Depends on the priest really. The shortest mass I’v seen was 20 mins.

If your client goes to the altar rail for Communion, just stand behind them. If the priest looks at you, gestures the Communion wine as light shake of your head will indicate no. If your client has mobility problems try to get the end of a row ( or pews if they still have them) and ask a steward as you go in for just your client to have Communion in their seat.
Just sit, stand as others do. But be prepared for a long service. Clothes, anything’s OK really, just regular clothes.

Admittedly it has been a long time since I went to my Catholic church but just copy everyone for standing and sitting and more standing and sitting, standing for the hymns etc sitting to listen and then comes the kneeling when the communion is being prepared.

The handshaking is when the priest (or in my case he was a Canon) says, "Peace be with you" and everyone says in reply, "and also with you" and then the priest says, "Let us offer one another the sign of peace" and you then turn to the person next to you and say peace be with you whilst giving their hand a quick shake. The row in front will turn round and you will also turn to the row behind you.

The only other thing to be prepared for is sometimes they bless the congregation with holy water, they dip a brush in the water and flick it above the heads of everyone, so you get a few drops on you.

I think you are doing a very lovely thing and this has made me think of my Mum who was a devout Catholic until the very end. It gave her a great deal of happiness.

Which is a very different setting to your average bog standard Catholic Church in the UK!