I’ve been in my relationship for nearly 10 years. We are engaged, but not marrying any time soon. Our (my boyfriend / fiancés) adult children (my Daughter / His Son) secretly starting seeing each other at the end of their senior year in high school, and they are now 23 years old and have been living together in their own house, for nearly 5 years now, or so.
I was really against it at first, and I made it clear that it did not look right, in the event, either of us got married. They kind of broke it off for about a year, which was actually during their junior year in High School, but got back together and around a month after my Daughters 18th Birthday, she moved out with him, where he moved to with a roommate, several months earlier. They’ve gone on to getting their own house since.
At times it might feel awkward when I’m speaking about my family, to my coworkers or acquaintances etc., who don’t know my kids, or anything like that, on a personal level; If I’m saying something about my Daughter, or her boyfriend… Or sometimes I’ll say my Boyfriend/ fiancés Son… I don’t know how to address it sometimes, and I kind of avoid mentioning the fact, to just anyone, who doesn’t otherwise need to know the full extent of our situation. But once we marry, it’s like… When we’re all together, which we have been on many occasions, I’ll be like these are our kids. Then people hear him call his Dad, Dad, or my Daughter calls me Mom, then they’re sitting their as a couple… People have questioned: Wait, who are your kids? Or his? Or are they both your kids? So then I have to explain it… It feels weird, but most people just shrug it off as no big deal.
The one thing I must say… Since My Fiancé and I will never have children of our own, it will be a joy to have a grandchild that shares both our DNA, if they ever decided to bear children. Not saying that I’m encouraging it, but we’re at the point where, it is possible.
Moreover, on cases of incest, in the United States it’s against the law to marry or have any relations with a blood relative, due to possible genetic challenges, if they were to have children. But it also considers “adopted siblings or family members to be incest (against the law as well) but, if they’re not blood related, then enter-genetic disorders, amid procreation, wouldn’t be a factor… Many have concluded, incest refers to blood relatives. The legality of it determine incest in part to being blood related and / or adopted.
Just thought I’d share!
Thanks