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To think this is not far from been incest AIBU

186 replies

Sandysunnyhotbeach · 08/05/2022 14:39

I know a young couple in their early 20's who have a young son, who is nearly 20 months old. The Girl's mother is dating her boyfriend's dad. So if they were to marry, they will be step brother and sister, her mother will be also her stepmother and also mother in law, if the girl marries her boyfriend.
I know there is no blood relation, only by marriage, but think this is werid and borderline incest.

OP posts:
Branleuse · 08/05/2022 18:03

Its not incest but its a weird and shitty thing to do to your family member.
Id definitely judge someone for this

Andromachehadabadday · 08/05/2022 18:10

Branleuse · 08/05/2022 18:03

Its not incest but its a weird and shitty thing to do to your family member.
Id definitely judge someone for this

What are they doing that’s shitty and how are they doing it anything to anyone?

I don’t see the issue at all.

The only way it would be weird is if the younger couple were brought up together. Which doesn’t sound like the case.

speakout · 08/05/2022 18:10

Branleuse · 08/05/2022 18:03

Its not incest but its a weird and shitty thing to do to your family member.
Id definitely judge someone for this

Why would you judge?

My cousin Annie became divorced. Lived a long while alone with her daughter, then met a good guy- Grant, married again, had a son- all well and happy.
Annie's mother and Grant's father had been widowed early- in their late 40s.

Family get togethers meant the two widowed grandparents had opportunity to meet and become friends. Which they did- and in their 50s developed a romantic relationship. Annie, Grant and all the family members were delighted when they married.
I can't see anything shitty about that.

PinkSyCo · 08/05/2022 18:14

It is sooo far from being incest. Hmm

pigsDOfly · 08/05/2022 18:15

What a ridiculous idea, of course it's not incest. Nor is it 'borderline' incest.

Even if, as some posters are saying, the younger couple were brought up together, which clearly they weren't, it still wouldn't be incest, it might be a bit odd, but it wouldn't be incest.

pigsDOfly · 08/05/2022 18:18

Branleuse · 08/05/2022 18:03

Its not incest but its a weird and shitty thing to do to your family member.
Id definitely judge someone for this

What is the weird and shitty thing that was done, and who is the family member who has had this weird and shitty thing done to them?

cordelia16 · 08/05/2022 18:23

how would the Girl's mother also be her stepmother? what am I missing?

I understand the step-mother-in-law part.

Cherrysoup · 08/05/2022 18:26

You’re being ridiculous.

IrisSibirica · 08/05/2022 18:27

Not incest IMO. Two adults in their twilight years met and want to be together. End of.

FabulousKilljoys · 08/05/2022 18:28

Don't be so silly

ChanceNorman · 08/05/2022 18:33

It would be a bit more odd if it was the parents who got together first and the step children knew each other growing up then got married.

The other way around though - so what?

If my mum got together with DH's dad I'd be very pleased for them, I love my mum and FIL is a nice bloke. The kids would be visiting nanny and grandad still...it's not like at their ages they'd be having any dc so there would be no 'shared sibling weirdness' for me and DH. I see literally zero issue at all.

Not even remotely near incest.

noborisno · 08/05/2022 18:38

Sandysunnyhotbeach · 08/05/2022 14:39

I know a young couple in their early 20's who have a young son, who is nearly 20 months old. The Girl's mother is dating her boyfriend's dad. So if they were to marry, they will be step brother and sister, her mother will be also her stepmother and also mother in law, if the girl marries her boyfriend.
I know there is no blood relation, only by marriage, but think this is werid and borderline incest.

Well since I'm pretty sure incest relates to blood relations, no, it's not like incest, at all.

Two children who grew up together but not blood related getting together would be like incest.

But the situation you describe is nothing like incest.

Cantthinkofanewusername · 08/05/2022 18:42

Happened in our family several generations back. Not incest as not blood related.

orbitalcrisis · 08/05/2022 18:46

The problem with incest is the risk of genetic abnormalities in any offspring, their parents getting married will not suddenly make them more likely to share the same genetic disorders! Honestly!

BritInUS1 · 08/05/2022 19:00

It's not incest

My old neighbours were step brother and sister

Dillydollydingdong · 08/05/2022 19:08

Oh ffs it's not incest if there's no blood connection. What happens if the older couple get together first? My dm got together with a man, and I went out with his son. Later we got married. Then they did. Should they have split up because the children married? Of course not.

Onwards22 · 08/05/2022 19:15

Its not incest but its a weird and shitty thing to do to your family member.

Id definitely judge someone for this

I agree.

My friend had been with her boyfriend for 2 years and after she left school his mum said she could move in with them whilst they save up to buy a place of their own.

My friends dad then met her boyfriend’s mum and starting dating and 6 months later moved in.
So it was my friend and her boyfriend and his mum and her dad all living together.

A couple years later my friend got pregnant and her mum also got pregnant around the same time.

It’s going to be really confusing for my friends baby when they grow up.

And the mums baby’s half brother will be in a relationship with her half sister.

Onwards22 · 08/05/2022 19:18

My dm got together with a man, and I went out with his son.

To me this is just weird - there are a million men in the world so why get with your mum’s boyfriends child?

dumdumduuuummmmm · 08/05/2022 21:10

Onwards22 · 08/05/2022 19:18

My dm got together with a man, and I went out with his son.

To me this is just weird - there are a million men in the world so why get with your mum’s boyfriends child?

You do realise that attraction and love works the way it works.

Stompythedinosaur · 08/05/2022 21:54

It isn't incest, and it is 0% anyone else's business.

lanthanum · 08/05/2022 22:17

I knew a couple whose widowed parents married each other. I presume they got to know each other through visiting the grandchildren, and how lovely that they found a new partner with whom they had so much in common.

YellaUmbrella · 08/05/2022 22:20

Hardly incest.
Weird if the parents have been together for decades and the children grew up as siblings I suppose.
And very awkward if either couple splits on bad terms!

echt · 09/05/2022 00:45

Do you know what incest means, OP?

You can't have near-incest. It either is or it isn't. This isn't.

AfterSchoolWorry · 09/05/2022 00:47

roosnunlilei · 08/05/2022 14:44

I don't think you understand incest

This

quietnightmare · 09/05/2022 00:48

It's just not normal (I know what's normal) but it's not this. Whoever got together first is fine the other is not