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Original poster

My ideal funeral.

108 replies

ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 20:17

Ok, I have Covid and although not likely to die soon I have talked through with my DH my ideal funeral.

The full 23 minute of Echoes by Pink Floyd.
Sling me in the burny pit.
Go out to itchyco park by the Small faces.
Retire to the pub for sausage rolls and gin.

I am honoured. Thank you for coming.

What would be you ideal send off!

OP posts:
KosherDill · 27/03/2022 20:19

How funny, I've often thought of Itchycoo Park as my funeral song. "it's all so beautiful!"

That and Peace Train by Cat Stevens.

However I plan to not have a funeral -- single, no kids. Just whisk me away. I'm more worried about who ends up with my jewelry, LOL.

Original poster
ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 20:23

I just don't want anyone talk shite about me. I just want to bore them to death with my favourite track!

OP posts:
AthenaWhite · 27/03/2022 20:25

I've asked for direct cremation, no funeral. If anyone wants to grieve or grieve together then they can do it as and when they want. My bestie wants the full horse driven hearse etc.

moreshitandnofuckingredemption · 27/03/2022 20:35

I want the blandest most everyman funeral ever music-wise - I would hate for any of my loved ones to associate any of my most-loved music with my funeral. Nimrod, few words if people feel up to it, cremation, off to the pub.
I'll sort the pub playlist though Grin

SilverSplitsTheBlue · 27/03/2022 20:38

DM wants her coffin lowered to Bruno Mars Uptown Funk, I told her the best I can do is the Tetris background song.

Original poster
ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 20:42

@moreshitandnofuckingredemption

I want the blandest most everyman funeral ever music-wise - I would hate for any of my loved ones to associate any of my most-loved music with my funeral. Nimrod, few words if people feel up to it, cremation, off to the pub. I'll sort the pub playlist though Grin
I just want all my friends and family to sit for 23 minutes shifting awkwardly in their seats thinking wtf is this??? I am not going out easily.
OP posts:
dudsville · 27/03/2022 20:43

If everything goes as planned I will be the last of my group as any remaining friends will be too old to navigate my day. So it's a quick, straight into the fire for me. It's both weird and freeing as a concept.

oliviastwisted · 27/03/2022 20:45

For my ideal funeral I would be definitely dead before they cremate me Grin

haveyouopenedyourbowelstoday · 27/03/2022 20:47

I want my body to have a direct cremation.
Then my ashes scattered at my favourite place and anyone who might miss me go out for a drink together.
I always think of the words from the poem
'I am not there, I did not die'.

PrisonerofZeroCovid · 27/03/2022 20:48

Six black plumed horses and the horse drawn hearse. May as well do it in style. I saw Malcolm McLaren's funeral procession- that's what he had. It looked epic. Did kind of make me laugh though- bit "establishment"

Original poster
ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 20:49

@PrisonerofZeroCovid

Six black plumed horses and the horse drawn hearse. May as well do it in style. I saw Malcolm McLaren's funeral procession- that's what he had. It looked epic. Did kind of make me laugh though- bit "establishment"
Ooh a Peaky Blinders vibe? I could work with that.
OP posts:
kitkatsky · 27/03/2022 20:51

Direct cremation, no fuss. I don't have many friends who would come but know plenty of vultures who would come and wail at my grave side for attention as seen them so it elsewhere 🙄 I don't want to have a big wedding as can't face being centred of attention and don't see what comfort my family would ger from the attention seekers coming so 🤷‍♀️

PenguinPup · 27/03/2022 20:53

Cheery idea for a thread Smile
My family can do what they like. I won't know anything about it so they may as well choose songs they want to hear.

Original poster
ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 20:54

Well we will all die one day! I am not at all morbid about the idea.

OP posts:
WWRGD · 27/03/2022 20:57

I've always said to my husband there must be lots of champagne and canapes for the wake. Now because of @moreshitandnofuckingredemption (great name btw) I have told him Nimrod for the music.

Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 27/03/2022 20:58

My dsis wanted Roman Keating’s ‘If tomorrow never comes’ for her funeral. I was tasked with locating a copy in the days before Spotify. I did disown dsis, and told every person I asked it was for my sister. But then, this was a woman who had Cliff Richard and Val Doonican CDs Hmm

She also wanted her team mates from the Paralympic Archery Squad who all turned up in full GB gear. Which did look good.

Actually her funeral was pretty damn perfect.

wanttomarryamillionaire · 27/03/2022 20:59

I want a wicker coffin, hundreds of brightly coloured flowers, horse and carriage rather than a hearse! Humanist celebrant, all my favourite songs, then buried with a bloody great big memorial stone! I want the works!

Original poster
ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 20:59

Nimrod is a fab choice. It was good enough for Prince Philip and my FIL so it must be good.

OP posts:
bloodywhitecat · 27/03/2022 21:00

We did DH's on Monday, he went in to Sunday Morning by the Kaisers, then we had Snow (Hey Oh), Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Mr Brightside, The Killers (because he always got the words completely wrong) and we went out to Something Just Like This by The Chain Smokers and Coldplay. He'd have loved the music. He had a beautiful wicker coffin and I dressed him in his wedding suit but with no tie because, even on our wedding day last May the tie was off as soon as the ceremony was done Smile so no tie was fitting.

Afterwards we hit the pub where we had our reception for a few pints of Ghost Ship and a good old catch up.

WWRGD · 27/03/2022 21:03

Flowers @bloodywhitecat

Original poster
ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 21:03

@bloodywhitecat

We did DH's on Monday, he went in to Sunday Morning by the Kaisers, then we had Snow (Hey Oh), Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Mr Brightside, The Killers (because he always got the words completely wrong) and we went out to Something Just Like This by The Chain Smokers and Coldplay. He'd have loved the music. He had a beautiful wicker coffin and I dressed him in his wedding suit but with no tie because, even on our wedding day last May the tie was off as soon as the ceremony was done Smile so no tie was fitting.

Afterwards we hit the pub where we had our reception for a few pints of Ghost Ship and a good old catch up.

That sounds so excellent. Just sorry you actually had to plan this funeral.
OP posts:
Thesefeetaremadeforwalking · 27/03/2022 21:04

I'm not having a funeral.

My body's going to the Medical School Anatomy Department at the local Teaching Hospital, as it won't be any use to me any more.

Hbh17 · 27/03/2022 21:04

Direct cremation.
No memorial service, no wake, no 'gathering', no ashes scattering.
No nothing.
I'll be dead & anyone who might be bothered can just remember me in their own head. Just so much easier & simpler for everyone.

Original poster
ApolloandDaphne · 27/03/2022 21:04

@Thesefeetaremadeforwalking

I'm not having a funeral.

My body's going to the Medical School Anatomy Department at the local Teaching Hospital, as it won't be any use to me any more.

This is also a good choice.
OP posts:
Juniper68 · 27/03/2022 21:05

Another one for direct cremation. Then anyone who wants to go and have a drink or 10. Dh and I have told adult dcs our wishes.