Things I’ve just learnt

[hopeful777]

I just found out you can’t put a chopping board in the dishwasher unless you want it to break 😕

as my family are now laughing at me, it made me wonder what other things have people learnt in adulthood that maybe others assume should be intrinsically known?

Ah just seen @LeftieLucy beat me to it with a near exact response 🤣

@KitKattaktik

Cheap glasses bounce off a tiled floor. The heirloom glass your grandmother gave you?

Shatters on impact.

I have found the opposite. Glasses bought now smash if you just clink them against something a bit sharpish. 2 glasses I have from my grandparents house (from the early 1970s,) have bounced from here to kingdom come, and they have never had a single tiny crack.

@Hillbillyhotel @MayMorris @Mydogmylife

I learned last week that ladybirds aren’t pee’ing on you. They’re bleeding from their feet because they’re so terrified.

That's not true though. They secrete a bad smelling acid to deter enemies, but they don't bleed from their feet. Also, when you have them crawling over the hand, they are free to fly away at any time, so they're very likely not afraid.

I have held ladybirds before, and had them crawl over my hand, (usually when I am lifting them out of some soil I am about to turn over, or fishing them out of some water,) and they don't secrete anything (or bleed anything!) I have also had butterflies sitting on my hand too. Not often, but occasionally. Hope that makes you feel better. They don't bleed with fear.

Oh also, of course a kipper is a fish! I know the 0 and O difference, and I knew the pineapple grows on the ground etc. But there's a BUNCH of stuff I have got wrong over the years/not known til recently, but I am gonna away and list them all.Got work soon!

I still think he was popping out for a shopping trip because his little brother went ‘Weeh! Weeh! Weeh all the way home’
They were therefore able to go out and about and come home again so nobody need worry.

@NewYearEveryYear

Russia and the USA are practically neighbours...despite being on opposite sides of the map.

I swear I knew the earth wasn't flat. But it hadn't occurred to me that a map joins up at the back.

That's only because we tend to have Europe centred maps. Pupils were often surprised to learn that Christmas Day and New Years day are 51 weeks apart in a calender year.

@hopeful777 Great thread. Thank you!!! Also, sorry, but that breadboard is hilarious.

@elephantoverthehill

StorminaBcup Dd and I had a similar conversation driving into Bristol on the A4. She asked if those were 'Misiltoe trees' and I explained it. However it is quite weird as mistletoe is only supposed to grow in areas devoid of pollution, the A4 is certainly not one.

I think that the misseltoe is less likely to produce the white berries if it's growing where there is polution, and for people gathering misseltoe to sell at christmas time, the stuff with berries is more popular.

@Soubriquet

When this little piggy went to market, he wasn’t popping off down to the shops

@SoubriquetOh my days - that never occured to me before reading your post! It's flippin obvious now I know! cheers :-)

@diddl

I don't believe the "This Little Piggy" one.

It's just a nonsense rhyme told to kids imo.

Just because you don't want to believe doesn't mean it isn't true.

The piggy 'going to market' is 100% going to be slaughtered - that's obvious and I always understood that even as a child

That on the weather app, where it has percentages, that’s the chance of rain and not how rainy it’s going to be (ie 100% rainy is very strong torrential rain, 10% rainy is just a bit of a drizzle).

WRONG it's the coverage in an area (usually the area highlighted on the map as they talk about it) - e.g. 40% of that area will get rain

@BiscuitLover3678

I’ve had multiple items melt in my house because the sunlight came into my bedroom and reflected off my facial mirror. Absolutely melted! I always put a tea towel over the mirror now.

When I was younger if I’d forgotten shaving foam I’d use body wash instead. Ugh! Bad idea. Conditioner is basically the same as shaving foam.

Loads of internal fridge thermometers go shit after time. Get a cheap one from Amazon and check. Will make your food last so much longer and stop you getting minor sickness.

Somebody I knew had a very expensive mirrored glass sculpture on their windowsill.... until it reflected sunlight and set fire to the curtains.

@Angrymum22

I agree with shoes not ageing well. DH had a pair of shoes he bought yrs ago but had remained packed in their box for over 10yrs. DS’s school shoes didn’t make it to the end of term so DH gave him his “brand new” old shoes to wear on the last day (Speech Day). As the day went in the shoes gradually disintegrated. DS was in and out of the cathedral where they have speech day, leaving a trail of crumbling sole material much to the amusement of his friends. They were not cheap shoes either.

Many years ago, living in Germany, I had a wonderful pair of snow boots, grey faux fur but so real looking that the Customs officer at Dover made me take them out of the car to show they didn't have legs! When we eventually returned to the UK I had no need to wear them for a few years but when we had a really snowy winter I was thrilled to get them out but the very thick rubber soles had split all across and no amount of super glue would fix them.

@Gatehouse77

I was in my early 40s when I found out fauna meant animals. I thought flora and fauna were flowering and non-flowering plants. I think I conflated fauna and fern 🤷‍♀️🙄

I found this out in my 20s because there was a shop called "Interfauna" which worked on similar principles to "interflora" ie delivering flowers by post, but was focused on delivering fluffy teddy versions of all sorts of obscure and wonderful animals e.g. a cuddly rhino or a cuddly octopus, all gift boxed and wrapped and sent out for next day delivery. It was great for people who you can't send flowers to due to allergies etc.

@butterpuffed

That raisins are dried grapes.

Funny that, as I love grapes but hate raisins

There are some really stupid comments here but this wins

@TibetanTerrah

Also misheard Alanis morrisette lyrics but from You Oughta Know. Instead of "the cross i bear that you gave to me" I thought it was "the cross eyed bear that you gave to me"

I thought it was like a secret relationship in joke

When I was small and we sang 'There is a green hill far away without a city wall' I could never understand why a green hill would need a city wall. A colleague wrote on a report for some pupil that he had a piece of coursework outstanding. His mother was thrilled on Parents' Evening until she found out what it really meant.

The most recent thing I learned was how frickin huge Moose are! I always assumed “big deer” but no, it’s more like “small elephant”

I mean you see them in wildlife documentaries but in the wild there’s often no context. It was only when a Canadian friend sent me a picture (which I now can’t find!) of one walking down a street in her rural town m, dwarfing the cars, that I realised those things are mahooosive!

Geography field trip to the coast.
We had to look at the 'seedy fences'.

It was a good few years before I learnt they were sea defences.

Re Moose:

“ An adult moose is about 7-8 feet at the shoulders. When they look upright, they could be as tall as 10 feet if you factor in the head and the horns.”

Honestly, Google pictures of them it’s insane!

This little piggy went to Margate
This little piggy went to Rome
This little piggy ate roast nuts
This one had yummy honeycomb

@AnchorWHAT

1. That split peas cooked in a pressure cooker take a lot less time than i thought to cook

1. That overfilling a pressure cooker can cause it to malfunction
2. That wearing split peas is not a great look
3. That cleaning split peas off the ceiling -and every other bastard surface in a kitchen- is bloody hard work

Yes and if you don't clean them off quickly they will go like concrete :)

@Clarinet1

DM found out when newly married at 29 that you don’t buy spaghetti off a reel by the yard.

Surely she would have known all about the spagheti trees!

@GracieLouFreeebush

Pole dancing poles can rotate

I wondered how they avoided friction burn

Not all poles rotate. You don't get friction burn because of the way you release your hands. (Do I sound like an expert? I did pole dancing for a few months and loved it. We started mostly worked with static poles, a couple of times she changed it to rotating poles. You do get lots of bruises in places you didn't know you could get bruises - but the satisfaction when you do your first inversion is amazing.)

Another thing about the moose….it’s main predator is the orca

I learnt, I think on mumsnet, that bird poo is their wee and poo combined, they only excrete one form of waste.

@doodlejump1980

I was 35 when I found out that capers are not tiny fish. 35.

38 here for that one. It still seems wrong.