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Original poster

She took my bloody co-op card

627 replies

HollowedOut · 10/03/2022 01:18

I’ve had a friend staying with me for the last few days, she due to go home tomorrow. As a thank you for letting her stay she offered to cook us a meal this evening which I gratefully accepted. She needed to go up to Co-Op to get the ingredients so I said to her to take my membership card if she hasn’t got one.

She went up and bought all the ingredients and cooked a really lovely meal. We had a bottle of wine with the meal but fancied another so I popped up to Co-Op again to buy another. I scan my member card like always and she’s spent all my points! There was about £30 on there that I have saved up for months. I like to know that I’ve always got a bit on there in case I’m short one month, it’s just a bit of reassurance.

If someone asked you to take their loyalty card to a shop when you had offered to cook them a meal would you assume that meant the person was offering to pay for the meal with their points? Or would you think they just wanted you to scan their card at checkout so you have a few more points?

Apologies if I’m rambling but it’s 1am, I’ve drunk a bottle of wine and I’m disproportionately pissed off that she’s spent my points!

OP posts:
Teaforme123 · 10/03/2022 08:59

She maybe misunderstood but I would have assumed you meant to just scan it for points. Bit rude of her to do that I would be annoyed too!

jytdtysrht · 10/03/2022 09:02

Anyone non grabby would obviously have known that you meant scan it for points or use it to obtain a members only price (if this applies to coop, in the same way the Tesco one reduces some individual prices). She has taken the piss spending 30. She might as well have taken the bank notes from your pocket.

EmbarrassingHadrosaurus · 10/03/2022 09:02

@drawingpad

Someone would have to be living a VERY sheltered life to not understand rewards points!

My life has not been sheltered but I don't understand these things, I just don't use them. It's information I don't need so I avoid. I could easily have done that happened here so I would say it definitely could be a simple misunderstanding.

If you had intended to pay (in the friend's position) and then OP gave you her card, I wonder if most people would've refused it and said, "No, let me pay, it's the least I can do in return for your hospitality" if they'd misunderstood the purpose.

If there was a misunderstanding the it seems it's more plausible that any mix-up happened at the checkout (whether self checkout or with a cashier).

It's probably worth OP and her chum having a conversation as it seems like the sort of thing that might fester unless it's mentioned.

Interested in this thread?

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General shopping
katepilar · 10/03/2022 09:03

@rookiemere

Seems like a totally innocent mistake. Just ask her but phrase it like your mistake " friend have noticed my Coop points that I keep for emergencies have all gone. This is totally my fault and super embarrassing but I must have communicated the wrong thing as I wanted to get the points from your shopping. Would it be ok for you to transfer what you spent back to me ? "
Thats a very good suggestion! It made me feel better just reading it.

I am thinking about communicating different situations so reading such a helpful comment is nice :)

Catflapkitkat · 10/03/2022 09:03

OMG that is bloody cheeky

StScholastica · 10/03/2022 09:04

@MMMarmite

Maybe she misunderstood - you said "take my card", she thought that meant "I want to pay for it, use this card".

Either that or she's a horrible thief, but seems unlikely given that presumably she was a good friend previously.

I completely agree with this.

You should have said "Here's my card, can you add the points please".

Shes obviously misunderstood.

Tulipomania · 10/03/2022 09:05

It sounds like a misunderstanding to me.

Dumblebum · 10/03/2022 09:05

I’d also have thought you meant use the points. I don’t use these cards so I’d have assumed that’s why you wanted me to take it. It wouldn’t have occured to me you want the points. She offered to cook, I’d assume she thought you were offering to pay with your points.

You needed to be clearer.

BorderlineHappy · 10/03/2022 09:07

If the CF was so confused about the points why didn't she offer the money back to the op.

It doesn't matter if the op offered her card for the points.
The friend was supposed to be paying anyway.

Alwayscheerful · 10/03/2022 09:07

Maybe the lady on the side till
Offered to use the points and she just nodded , they do that in Sainsbury's sometimes.

katepilar · 10/03/2022 09:08

@jytdtysrht

Anyone non grabby would obviously have known that you meant scan it for points or use it to obtain a members only price (if this applies to coop, in the same way the Tesco one reduces some individual prices). She has taken the piss spending 30. She might as well have taken the bank notes from your pocket.
Thats a lot of assumptions. A she may not have an idea how this card works. Just because you use them and know how they work doesnt mean everybody does. She may not like using these cards (I hate them and dont have any for example) or she may have a different shop where she lives or any other reason I cant thing of. B There could have been so much confusion at the til that she may not know that the coop card was debeted and thinks she paid for the shopping herself.
Original poster
HollowedOut · 10/03/2022 09:08

@inkyfingers I gave her the card so she could get the points on my card, yes. I don’t think that’s cheeky - it costs her nothing to hand the card over and get another 30p of points or whatever and I’d asked her if she had a card herself which she didn’t so it’s not like she’s losing them.

She’s only just woken up and in the shower atm. I’ve just got back from the school run and always pop into co-op on the way back so I’ll ask her when she’s up and say I’ve just noticed it.

OP posts:
Alwayscheerful · 10/03/2022 09:09

The cashier!

Alwayscheerful · 10/03/2022 09:10

@katepilar
I agree

shrunkenhead · 10/03/2022 09:10

Looking forward to the response...

TrashyPanda · 10/03/2022 09:11

That is beyond cheeky

Bluesheep8 · 10/03/2022 09:12

It's £30. Suck it up.

£30 is a lot of money to some of us

SarahAndQuack · 10/03/2022 09:14

I agree with those saying she assumed you meant 'and use the points on my card'.

Mind you, if I were the friend I'd feel a right wally when you told me.

billy1966 · 10/03/2022 09:14

@Prescottdanni123

I would have assumed that you wanted me to scan it at the tills for more points.
Absolutely this.

Complete CF.

Awful behaviour.

dreamingofsun · 10/03/2022 09:14

so bottle of wine might have cost £10, did the rest of the food coast £20? That would seem quite a costly meal to me. Has she bought other stuff for herself as well?

AnotherLongDay · 10/03/2022 09:16

She’s a CF

britneyisfree · 10/03/2022 09:16

Literally the biggest piss take. How dare she. I don't use cards and all those things but I'd be livid tbh

SleepingStandingUp · 10/03/2022 09:17

Yanbu.

If you'd lent her a coat cos it was cold and she'd found £30 in the pocket would she have spent it?

Original poster
HollowedOut · 10/03/2022 09:17

I can see how it easily came to £30. She made a curry and then a pavlova for pudding. She made a bloody great mess and spent most of the day doing it too. It was lush though. I had pretty much all the spices and stuff she’d have needed for the curry but she’d bought new ones anyway as she hadn’t seen only spice rack or thought to ask if I had some already. Which was fine until I found out that I was paying for it.

OP posts:
EarringsandLipstick · 10/03/2022 09:19

@HollowedOut

I can see how it easily came to £30. She made a curry and then a pavlova for pudding. She made a bloody great mess and spent most of the day doing it too. It was lush though. I had pretty much all the spices and stuff she’d have needed for the curry but she’d bought new ones anyway as she hadn’t seen only spice rack or thought to ask if I had some already. Which was fine until I found out that I was paying for it.
Did. You. Ask. Her?

Honestly why are you here speculating and being aggrieved? She's your friend; you ask her.

I honestly can see how it was a genuine mistake.

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