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Original poster

She took my bloody co-op card

627 replies

HollowedOut · 10/03/2022 01:18

I’ve had a friend staying with me for the last few days, she due to go home tomorrow. As a thank you for letting her stay she offered to cook us a meal this evening which I gratefully accepted. She needed to go up to Co-Op to get the ingredients so I said to her to take my membership card if she hasn’t got one.

She went up and bought all the ingredients and cooked a really lovely meal. We had a bottle of wine with the meal but fancied another so I popped up to Co-Op again to buy another. I scan my member card like always and she’s spent all my points! There was about £30 on there that I have saved up for months. I like to know that I’ve always got a bit on there in case I’m short one month, it’s just a bit of reassurance.

If someone asked you to take their loyalty card to a shop when you had offered to cook them a meal would you assume that meant the person was offering to pay for the meal with their points? Or would you think they just wanted you to scan their card at checkout so you have a few more points?

Apologies if I’m rambling but it’s 1am, I’ve drunk a bottle of wine and I’m disproportionately pissed off that she’s spent my points!

OP posts:
Arabellla · 11/03/2022 15:01

[quote HollowedOut]@Mummyoflittledragon I’ve been back to the thread multiple times and have spoken about it with my friend Confused[/quote]
You’ve spoken about the thread without friend?

AryaStarkWolf · 11/03/2022 15:18

You’ve spoken about the thread without friend?

She's spoken about taking the £30 in points with her friend I'm pretty sure the OP means

Original poster
HollowedOut · 11/03/2022 15:53

@Mummyoflittledragon I told her that she’s spent the £30 and she claimed to have thought the shopping was cheap but didn’t offer to pay me back.

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General shopping
rookiemere · 11/03/2022 15:56

But you haven't asked her directly for the money back have you ?

ABitBesotted · 11/03/2022 16:38

She shouldn't have to.

Ilovetheseventies · 11/03/2022 16:44

I wouldnt dream of giving someone my card to put points onto unless i was with them in the shop i might so i think you are partly to blame.

Arabellla · 11/03/2022 17:03

@Ilovetheseventies

I wouldnt dream of giving someone my card to put points onto unless i was with them in the shop i might so i think you are partly to blame.
But I bet you’d happily steal someone’s points, like OP’s ‘friend’.
Mummyoflittledragon · 11/03/2022 17:08

Ok so you’re kind of where you were yesterday before she left, perhaps.

Have you thought anymore about asking her for the money? You’ve had a few suggestions as to how to do this and a couple of us have said she possibly doesn’t get the implication that £30 is a lot to you. If she is genuine, she will be mortified she read the situation so wrong and thought you were teasing her about spending the points.

Gonnagetgoing · 11/03/2022 17:09

[quote HollowedOut]@Mummyoflittledragon I told her that she’s spent the £30 and she claimed to have thought the shopping was cheap but didn’t offer to pay me back.[/quote]
@HollowedOut - as I said before ask her for the money or say something like something towards it so - £20 etc. If she refuses she's not very nice and a bit mean. And on that basis I'd probably end the friendship but you should definitely ask her.

Gonnagetgoing · 11/03/2022 17:10

Thing is though, I get why you don't want to ask. It's a bit embarrassing for you to have to ask her for money. Most people don't like asking for money to be paid back.

But she has no idea of your finances and that you were saving these points for a rainy day.

LaraDeSalle · 11/03/2022 17:12

Giving someone your points card to take with to the shop when they made the offer of thanking them by cooking them a meal and needed to buy the ingredients would clearly mean to me that they were asking for the card to be used to get the extra points, not for the existing points to be used up to purchase the shopping.

If she really did think that you were offering to pay for the ingredients with your points why didn’t she say before she left that the meal was to say thanks and she would be paying for the food and decline the offer of the points on the card at which point you would point out her confusion and say that you wanted the points from the shop to go on the card, not to be used to pay for the goods.

But she didn’t and she has deliberately used the points to pay hoping you wouldn’t notice until after she left.

FlowerArranger · 11/03/2022 17:37

To recap...

This friend freeloader stayed with you for 'a few' (3 or 4?) days.
During which time you (presumably) fed her and she used your home's amenities (heating, water, etc).
And all she contributed was £7 towards a meal she cooked (messily).

ConfusedShockHmm

LaraDeSalle · 11/03/2022 17:42

Chancer - a person who takes the piss under the guise of pretending to be a nice person and when called out on their heinous behaviour, acts with nonchalance and won’t make amends, all the while looking bewildered that you could possibly think they had done you any wrong.

EthelTheAardvark · 11/03/2022 17:42

I still haven’t had anyone tell me why it is cheeky to ask someone to put points on a loyalty card for you though

It's not in the least cheeky.

As you aren't planning to keep the friendship up, you have nothing to lose by sending her your bank details so that she can pay the £30 back.

Cherrysoup · 11/03/2022 17:43

If you think the friendship is pretty much over, ask her to repay the money. I’d be really pissed off with this, I save my points for Christmas so I can get the meal for free, pretty much.

Ilovetheseventies · 11/03/2022 17:55

Yes of course i would steal someones points
Arabella you know me so well ! Grin

Lovewinemorethanhusband · 11/03/2022 17:57

I've only got £7 on my card and my husband took my card yesterday to get a couple of bits on school run and I told him on pain of death will he use my points ! I'm saving them up for a bottle of champagne 😂

Arabellla · 11/03/2022 17:57

@Ilovetheseventies

Yes of course i would steal someones points Arabella you know me so well ! Grin
See, called it.
Insanelysilver · 11/03/2022 17:57

Is there any way she miss understood and thought you meant her to use your points to pay ?
Or Couid she have not been familiar with a points card and told the check out person she was to use the points card ?
If not then tbh she’s stolen money from you which is a bit shocking ! Are you going to say something to her ?

Lovewinemorethanhusband · 11/03/2022 17:58

Pressed post to soon ! So I'd be livid if a friend did it and would ask them about it, it's proper cheeky

Ilovetheseventies · 11/03/2022 17:58

Can't be much of a friend if she isn't going to give you £30 back.

SylvieB74 · 11/03/2022 18:07

Some bloody thank you 🤔

Mirw · 11/03/2022 18:14

So you bought the meal she just cooked it. Not really a thank you. Ask her for the money...

Owl55 · 11/03/2022 18:15

She probably misunderstood you and thought you were offering something towards the meal , you had a lovely meal so suck it up rather than lose a friend

KTheGrey · 11/03/2022 18:19

Well she's as economical with the truth as she is with her money, isn't she? Because if the co op charges you seven quid for nearly £40-worth of shopping and you don't query it you're not very honest, either. Either way, what a mean thing to do, to make you a thank you meal for your hospitality and make you pay and leave your kitchen a tip. Ouch.