Page 2 | 16 yo daughter has fake ID delivered!!!

TryingmybestMum · 2022-03-01T12:11:54+00:00

A letter arrived for my daughter this morning, I know at 16 I should respect her privacy and not open it but I did (feeling conflicted) . No address on envelope and clearly a card inside and no letter. It’s a citizens card stating she is 2 years old than she is (I.e stating she is 18)! I looked on the citizen card site and this looks really passable and the qr code works!!! Im furious but not sure how to play this conversation. Also furious that she gets allowance each month (no job yet until after GCSE’s) and it looks like fake ID are relatively expensive (compared to her allowance). I want to calm down and have something of a remotely calm conversation when she gets in but would welcome other thoughts. Anyone handled this??

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 01/03/2022 12:42

All kids have fake IDs at that age - I couldn't get worked up about this. More often than not they get confiscated by pubs etc if they look suspicious. You shouldn't have opened her post - gross invasion of privacy.

beenaroundtheblox · 01/03/2022 12:42

@Ursusmajor

What about just hiding it or destroying it and not saying anything? That whatever her plan is that involves fake ID won’t happen.

This feels so wrong yet I'd be so tempted.

Original poster

TryingmybestMum · 01/03/2022 12:43

Thanks all, really helpful! We generally have a very open relationship and conversations and she tells me to open a lot of her mail (bank and health etc) as she has missed important things sometimes. However I did open it as I was suspicious and completely get that this is polarising ( I genuinely am conflicted on it still!!). Answers have really helped me think how I would or wouldn’t want to handle it for our house (totally respect all thoughts though). I think it boils down to me . Firstly she is really open with us on so much (we have navigated a lot through her teen years) why not this? If she has a small group of friends over with meals or meals out we aren’t totally anti alcohol (within lots of boundaries and other parents consent etc and it’s legal at 16+ with food) but this is against the law. It’s fraud £5000 fine etc plus implications on licensees liked flagged. I think I am really worried about where she was planning on going with it (the local teens all know where they can get vapes or dodgy off licenses if that was it) so I suspect this is about going ‘out out’, would that mean we wouldn’t know where she was? Somewhere dodgy etc? Anyway, you’ve really helped my thinking and totally appreciate not everyone will agree.

OP posts:

GirlInACountrySong · 01/03/2022 12:43

@ShiftingSands21

I had a fake ID as did all my friends when we were 16/17. “European Driving Permit” anyone?

interesting!

I will flag this with our company as another way of getting round the strict age restriction this country has in place to protect us all

thanks for the heads up!

TarcasticSwat · 01/03/2022 12:44

@AskingforaBaskin 🤣 melodramatic much? Calm the fuck down.

She's clearly intending to use it to buy some alcohol, as most people do at that age doubt it's for identity theft. Are you going to report this to Mi5?

Seriously, some of you MNers need to get out the house now and then.

girlmom21 · 01/03/2022 12:44

Ignore all the people telling you everyone at that age has fake ID's. They don't. And even if they did, that wouldn't make it ok for your daughter to go to a nightclub full of alcohol and booze or whatever she's planning to do before she's even taken her GCSEs.

I was her age 10 years ago and nobody had fake ID's. We just sent the oldest looking people to buy our booze but the repercussions are much stricter now for businesses servicing minors.

AskingforaBaskin · 01/03/2022 12:46

[quote TarcasticSwat]@AskingforaBaskin 🤣 melodramatic much? Calm the fuck down.

She's clearly intending to use it to buy some alcohol, as most people do at that age doubt it's for identity theft. Are you going to report this to Mi5?

Seriously, some of you MNers need to get out the house now and then.[/quote]
That's exactly what I think she is doing. And the poor license holder if she is caught will be at risk of losing more than her.

Why do you think that's OK? Why do you think someone losing their livelihood is shits and giggles?

GirlInACountrySong · 01/03/2022 12:46

if she used it to access a nightclub then she gets her drink spiked?
uses it to buy blades
spray paint for offensive graffiti?
glue?
alcohol
tobacco...

theres restrictions in place for reasons and who is to say she wouldn't get it on behalf of someone else?

Stomacharmeleon · 01/03/2022 12:46

@AskingforaBaskin drama lama jeez.

GirlInACountrySong · 01/03/2022 12:47

[quote TarcasticSwat]@AskingforaBaskin 🤣 melodramatic much? Calm the fuck down.

She's clearly intending to use it to buy some alcohol, as most people do at that age doubt it's for identity theft. Are you going to report this to Mi5?

Seriously, some of you MNers need to get out the house now and then.[/quote]
not clear its for alcohol at all...

AskingforaBaskin · 01/03/2022 12:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 01/03/2022 12:48

I think a lot of the people getting a bit over-excited about this don't have older teens. I have an 18yo now and she was drinking in pubs at 17 with fake ID. If you make it forbidden they just want to do it more. All her mates were doing the same. No one got their livelihood taken away or anything dramatic like that.

GirlInACountrySong · 01/03/2022 12:50

where i work trading standards and the police send in young people to try and catch us out

then the company is fined the individual is fined and can be given a custodial sentence with implications regarding international travel. no USA visits for that person who was duped!

girlmom21 · 01/03/2022 12:50

@chocolatesaltyballs22

I think a lot of the people getting a bit over-excited about this don't have older teens. I have an 18yo now and she was drinking in pubs at 17 with fake ID. If you make it forbidden they just want to do it more. All her mates were doing the same. No one got their livelihood taken away or anything dramatic like that.

See drinking in the local pub or whatever wouldn't actually worry me (if there were no implications for staff) - it's more nightclubs etc that concern me.

GirlInACountrySong · 01/03/2022 12:51

@chocolatesaltyballs22

I think a lot of the people getting a bit over-excited about this don't have older teens. I have an 18yo now and she was drinking in pubs at 17 with fake ID. If you make it forbidden they just want to do it more. All her mates were doing the same. No one got their livelihood taken away or anything dramatic like that.

nobody lost livelihood? so that makes it ok? ANYONE working in retail could have their lives ruined...same for any licensed premises

disgusting attitude....its not all about your kid and your bad parenting. other people are at risk

girlmom21 · 01/03/2022 12:52

@GirlInACountrySong

where i work trading standards and the police send in young people to try and catch us out

then the company is fined the individual is fined and can be given a custodial sentence with implications regarding international travel. no USA visits for that person who was duped!

Do they send them in with fake ID though? When I was younger they sent them in with no ID and just got the kids to try and blag it

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 01/03/2022 12:52

@girlmom21 I think nightclubs are a lot stricter, certainly where I live anyway. She never tried to get into a club before she was 18.

girlmom21 · 01/03/2022 12:53

[quote chocolatesaltyballs22]@girlmom21 I think nightclubs are a lot stricter, certainly where I live anyway. She never tried to get into a club before she was 18.[/quote]
But that's the issue with this ID. OP said it appears completely legit.

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 01/03/2022 12:53

And if I'm a 'bad parent' there are plenty others out there like me. Believe me when you have an older teen you pick your battles and this really isn't one of them. There are far worse things that can happen than them having a few ciders before they're 18. Jesus, dramatic much.

AskingforaBaskin · 01/03/2022 12:55

@chocolatesaltyballs22

And if I'm a 'bad parent' there are plenty others out there like me. Believe me when you have an older teen you pick your battles and this really isn't one of them. There are far worse things that can happen than them having a few ciders before they're 18. Jesus, dramatic much.

Far worse to happen to them? But what about the license holders?

I can't think of much worse than loosing your career and potentially your home.

Original poster

TryingmybestMum · 01/03/2022 12:56

It does. There is a QRcode you scan on the back and it says age verified. Looks just like the proper ones!

OP posts:

Tdcp · 01/03/2022 12:58

Tbh with you I wouldn't get too worked up about it. I'd talk to her about it and explain the implications of using it. If she's still willing to risk it after knowing all the facts then the saying "if you can't hear then you must feel" comes into play..
But I grew up with a hippy mother so 😉

daisyjgrey · 01/03/2022 12:59

If she used it to access a nightclub then she gets her drink spiked?
uses it to buy blades
spray paint for offensive graffiti?
glue?
alcohol
tobacco

Oh no! Not....paint!

axolotlfloof · 01/03/2022 12:59

But if the licence holder checks an Id and its valid, surely they have done nothing wrong?

Original poster

TryingmybestMum · 01/03/2022 12:59

Absolutely. Not mad keen on the idea
of pubs but clubs are a different kettle
of fish. we live close to town where there are a number of fairly grim nightclubs. They may think they are savvy at 16 but don’t realise so many risks. The thought of spiking and the environment when she is still not an adult is where my head is at.

OP posts: