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What easy things are you just shit at?

426 replies

coastergirl · 11/02/2022 20:09

It's ridiculous. I'm a 37 year old woman. I have 2 kids, a job I love. I function reasonably well!

I cannot butter bread. I make a complete mess of it. Holes in the bread etc. I can't blame it on hard butter because I use marg.

I'm ill and bored. Please make me feel better by telling me the "easy" things you're shit at.

OP posts:
coastergirl · 15/02/2022 21:36

@thestarvingcaterpillar

35g plain flour
1 egg
50mls milk
Salt

Whisk together until it has little bubbles and is smooth. Put in the fridge for half an hour or so.

Oil in your tray, into the oven until it's really hot. Open the oven and pull the tray partly out. Pour batter into tray and put it back in, close the oven. Sit on the floor with a glass of red and watch them rise majestically (if you're weird like me).

It's never failed me.

OP posts:
coastergirl · 15/02/2022 21:39

@LassoOfTruth

Lantana 2 in 1 Safety/Smooth Edge Tin Can Opener & Bottle Opener - Black/Stainless Steel https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07464F5WN/ref=cmswwrcppapiglttiCX3WZVJHD8R712WQFFX0

This is what I have after struggling with tin openers for years. Once you get the hang of it, it's brilliant.

OP posts:
sqirrelfriends · 15/02/2022 21:39

I can't park for shit. I'm actually dreading a time when I might have to parallel park as I haven't done it since I was a learner.

My car has a button that does it for me but I can't even use that right.

thestarvingcaterpillar · 15/02/2022 21:41

@coastergirl the glass of red is obviously where I've been going wrong!!!
Right, will try that method too!!

DiscordandRhyme · 15/02/2022 21:43

Housework. I'm just rubbish at anything organisation wise.

LesLavandes · 15/02/2022 21:43

Separating white and yolk of eggs

coastergirl · 15/02/2022 21:45

@thestarvingcaterpillar that's definitely where you've been going wrong. 🍷

OP posts:
squishmycherry · 15/02/2022 21:46

I can't fucking peel things properly.

waterlego · 15/02/2022 22:58

Styling hair, putting an outfit together, applying make up. I just don’t bother trying anymore.

Catching a ball. I still do that hideously embarrassing thing of sort of yelping, cowering and moving out of the way. Blush

Using zips. I can use zips but something about my technique is obviously awry because I always break them.

SouthParkCovid · 15/02/2022 23:01

Driving.

Early 30s and still haven't passed my test. Took lessons on and off for years but struggle so much.

Hopeisnotastrategy · 15/02/2022 23:06

Opening supermarket carrier bags.

I have the wrong kind of fingers.

Hopeisnotastrategy · 15/02/2022 23:10

@BearSoFair

Changing duvet covers. Always 50-50 whether the duvet or me will end up in the cover Grin
I used to have a small dog who would arse about and climb inside the cover when I was changing it.

Didn't help! 🤣

SouperNoodle · 15/02/2022 23:16

@SouthParkCovid

Driving.

Early 30s and still haven't passed my test. Took lessons on and off for years but struggle so much.

Same. I'm early thirties and started my lessons last year. In all fairness, there have been big gaps without lessons over the past few months but I just seen to not be totally getting it. I can't maintain focus due to ADHD and even though I'm medicated, it's still really difficult.

I have my test in March but don't have much hope 😔

Hopeisnotastrategy · 15/02/2022 23:28

@coastergirl

I'm so glad I made this thread. I have trouble seeing myself as a competent adult, and doubt myself all the time. It's nice to see that other people have trouble with everyday tasks. (And I was nervous about making my own thread)
I am loving this thread, it is really making me chuckle. We need more threads like this!.
ThomasinaGallico · 15/02/2022 23:35

Always have to think about left and right.

Can’t get through the supermarket quickly. Don’t know why, I don’t even like the places. I just sort of glaze over and slow down and lose all sense of time like I’m drugged.

Can’t do babytalk, can’t talk naturally to young children. Even with my own, I felt I was playing a part with them, until they hit their teens Confused

Can’t hit, catch or throw to save my life. There’s a reason for that though: I have a lazy eye that was never operated on till my early teens, making my 3D perception distinctly unreliable. It’s just about good enough for driving, but ball games ain’t happening.

I can’t stay tidy. Now and again I have a clear-out but I’ve never resolved the floordrobe dilemma (what to do with clothes clean enough to wear again but not clean enough to fold up and put away, like home-from-work stuff you change into in the evening).

I can’t do hair. Hence having it short.

Waitwhat23 · 15/02/2022 23:52

I can't do hair either. My choices are down (and by that I mean brushed, rather than styled) or up in a fairly messy ponytail.

I am rather in awe of people who can do those big bouncy tv style waves or who can do backwards fishtail plaits.

waterlego · 16/02/2022 00:00

@IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads

Sometimes we don’t always need to be able to do everything. About 25 years ago I shared a flat with a chap was a great cook, but a bit inept in other ways. The button came off his “pulling shirt”, and I sewed it back on for him. In exchange he went out, and a roasted a chicken for me to give the person I’d invite round. We’ve both been married to the people we were entertaining that night for over 20 years.
This is such a lovely story @IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads. (Also love your username!)
dropthevipers · 16/02/2022 00:23

@foxlover47

Cooking rice , unless it's boil in the bag it's always ended up inedible :(
Try this-trust me, it works. put one cup of rice (basmati) into the saucepan along with two cups of hot water from the kettle. Bring to the boil then turn down to the lowest possible simmer. Place the lid on and cook for ten minutes. Take off the heat and leave for ten minutes. fluff with a fork-it will be perfect, I promise you.
Furries · 16/02/2022 04:12

@Fluffycloudland77

I can’t paint woodwork. I can paint walls, I’ve decorated all bar one room in this house on my own & I’m not half bad at it.

It’s just rubbish at doing the woodwork.

I hate painting walls! To me, it’s that huge expanse that needs filling in, plus the cutting-in to ceiling etc. But I love painting woodwork - give me doors, frames, skirting any day.

Next time you’re up for a refurb, let’s swap houses for a week - then we can return and crack on with the bits we don’t mind doing.

Furries · 16/02/2022 04:37

@100problems

Dance.

I dance like a wobbly wardrobe and have absolutely no rhythm. Worse, I rush excitedly to the dance floor with arms waving about like I'm going to know what to do when I get there. Then I get there, become a wardrobe and have to count time until the song ends so I can mime that I need a drink and shuffle back off.

This is me - I love this description 😂
Furries · 16/02/2022 04:52

@squishmycherry

I can't fucking peel things properly.
Have you tried this type of peeler? I hate the more traditionally shaped peelers, but I’ve had this type for years and find it so much easier (I definitely don’t trust myself to peel with just a knife!)

www.amazon.co.uk/OXO-Good-Grips-Y-Peeler/dp/B00004OCIU/ref=asc_df_B00004OCIU/?hvlocphy=1006826&linkCode=df0&hvptwo&psc=1&psc=1&hvnetw=g&hvadid=205220620749&hvpone&hvlocint&th=1&hvpos&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl&hvqmt&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&hvtargid=pla-384699632300&hvrand=12443520980906070937

Furries · 16/02/2022 05:00

Parking - I am absolutely useless at reversing into a parking bay, but equally useless at reversing myself out of a bay if there are cars either side. I will happily drive round a car park to find a bay that I can drive into and then drive out of when I leave!

Distances - I have no blooming clue. I measure them in approximate minutes.

Make-up. I pretty much don’t bother, I’ve given up trying.

Duvet covers. I obviously manage to do them, but it’s not elegant or efficient - to an bystander it looks like I’m trying to wrestle with blancmange. I could do a single fine, but anything above that is not fun.

Houseplants - given up on them. I justify it by deciding in my head that they’re all bad if you have cats 😂

Furries · 16/02/2022 05:24

A few things that have “helped” me:

Left vs right - I’m right-handed. So, in my head I now quickly “rationalise” that I write with my right hand. I also instinctively know that L comes before R in the alphabet. So, when I’m looking ahead, those two facts spring into my brain almost instantly. Same as loosening/tightening things - my brain now remembers “lefty loosey, righty tighty”.

Cutting wrapping paper. For me, it’s never perfect, but this has helped. Don’t make a cutting or snipping motion with the scissors. Have them part way open and “glide” them across the width of the roll. If you’ve got REALLY shit paper this doesn’t work as well, but I’ve found it ok with most paper from supermarkets etc.

Wrapping presents. If it’s books, dvd/cd, basically anything solid it’s easy to wrap. For odd shapes, soft stuff like clothes etc, then I try to store a few empty boxes during the year. You basically need a good cube/rectangular shape to make your life easier. The first side of paper that you fold over the box - use a piece of sellotape to tape that paper to the box. This gives you a “firm” starting point so that things aren’t moving around. Then fold the other side over and tape it. When you come to do each end, when you fold the sides in to prepare the “triangles” use a small bit of tape to attach the middle folds to the box. You’re then left with the triangle, which is much easier to fold up and stick, as the rest of the paper is secure.

Omelettes. I’m a pretty rubbish cook, but my omelettes are ok. I crack a couple of eggs into a measuring jug and whisk them with a fork. I then add my ingredients (for me, some chopped up ham, chopped mushroom and some grated cheese). Give it all a bit of a stir. Heat the frying pan and pour the mixture in. Don’t touch it or stir it in the pan - leave it alone! I then use sight to just judge when it’s “solid” enough to fold it over - and again when to flip the folded omelette upside down to do the other side.

Catching things. This one is more niche and only if you have time on your hands! Look at the basics of learning to juggle. Even if you don’t want to learn to juggle, the idea behind it has helped my eye/hand coordination. Juggling balls are a great weight to learn catching with. Just get used to throwing a ball from one hand to the other. The other trick is to “look without looking”. You’re aware of where the item is, but you’re not looking right at it - your brain starts to process where your hands need to be.

JadeSeahorse · 16/02/2022 05:25

Those bloody click clack packs that contain liquid washing capsules!

I can close them - no problem - but no way can I open them.

Surprised no-one else has said this so definitely must be me.😂

Cattybombati · 16/02/2022 05:27

The DVLA very clear that they don't think I should drive on roads after three failed tests. Also switching on TV never goes well for me, which is great cause it means I barely watch TV.