Page 4 | Neighbours have reported us to social services

Liverbird77 · 23/01/2022 08:43

I am so sorry. You sound lovely.
Definitely screen shot everything. Do you have a log of all the things they've done? If not, start one.
Report them to the council.
Contact your doctor and tell them about the stress this is causing you, especially in light of your injury. That will then also be on official record.
Can you install CCTV/ring doorbell?
Do not engage with these scumbags at all.
You shouldn't have to, but in your situation I would certainly move. Keep looking.
Finally, do not give social services another thought this weekend. They'll soon dismiss this allegation.

gonewiththegin · 23/01/2022 08:43

Oh OP please don’t worry. If you do have contact from Social Services let them know said neighbour has put it all over Facebook and have proof as others have said. If it was a genuine concern and not malicious it wouldn’t be plastered all over the internet.

Unfortunately these people will never change and are judgmental of you and DH as you both are nothing like them. I hope you manage to get out ASAP. In the meantime report them for harassment to the council they rent from, the police and Facebook.

You think people would have some compassion, two young kids is hard enough never mind your brain injury. All this added stress is appalling. Take care OP 💐

Ovenaffray · 23/01/2022 08:46

Screenshot everything and go to the police.

Can you get a benefits review to make sure you are claiming all you’re entitled to?

Meg581 · 23/01/2022 08:47

Try and see this as an opportunity. Social services do not take children away from good parents! If everything you say is true, they will soon see that. If you’re struggling with illness then you may actually find there are options for you to receive additional support which you can discuss during their visit. Try not to stress about it x

Lougle · 23/01/2022 08:49

I'd be amazed if SS did anything other than ring you. However, when they do, I would jump on it and say "I'm so glad you've rung. I am disabled due to a brain tumour and DH is trying to look after us all but that means he can only work part time. Our housing situation is unsuitable so we could really do with your help."

SilverPeacock · 23/01/2022 08:50

You need to get some housing advice from your local council. I would have thought that your disabilities plus the harassment might bump you up the list for social housing. Racial slurs and targeted harassment should be reprted to the police and adult social services even. This is now causing you some significant emotional/psychological harm and your added vulnerabilities on top of this - they should really be compelled to offer you some support with it.

Bigkingdom · 23/01/2022 08:51

Honestly fake screenshots asap before posts get deleted. Have you ever reported any antisocial behaviour to the police? If so make sure social services are aware. Tell them the full story of what you have been going through since moving in.

Sickoffamilydrama · 23/01/2022 08:53

Do you know if your neighbors renting as well? As then there maybe a chance they could be asked to leave for anti social behaviour.

Especially as you are struggling to find somewhere I would start making a diary of their behaviour and pass it on to the landlord and police. Then keep reporting and don't stop/let it go if they've already made the other neighbour's live miserable and have form this maybe even easier.

Our old neighbours were removed from their house due to their behaviour annoyingly it was just after we moved but we were moving anyway as needed more bedrooms.

And don't do what we did which is feel bad about trying to get them removed, they could stop the behaviour particularly as they would have had warnings about it with your other neighbour. In fact or old neighbours had an warning about their behaviour and stopped for a while then apparently ramped it up again after we left. Which finally got them removed.... apparently to another area down the road so sadly they are now someone else's problem 🤦‍♀️

Octopi · 23/01/2022 08:56

Do you know if your neighbors renting as well? As then there maybe a chance they could be asked to leave for anti social behaviour.

OP made sure to mention that everyone else on the street rents from the council.

UsernameInTheTown · 23/01/2022 08:59

Screen shot everything on their FB and contact the police OP. This is harassment to say the least.

Social Services will help you in this instance, I've been there, malicious SS claim, and SS were brilliant.
It'll all be fine

Sickoffamilydrama · 23/01/2022 09:01

@Octopi

Do you know if your neighbors renting as well? As then there maybe a chance they could be asked to leave for anti social behaviour.

OP made sure to mention that everyone else on the street rents from the council.

Must have missed that thanks.

Bingo then your life just got easier then OP you should be able to anonymously complain to the housing officer our one had a diary you completed.

Mollymoostoo · 23/01/2022 09:03

@Rosie1990x

Heartbroken. No other words.

I’ve posted about our neighbours before on this account. Basically we moved here as we needed a cheaper house after my DH had to drop his full time job to work part time to care for me as I have a brain injury that is quite progressive. We have two DS. Our eldest is 2 and our youngest is 10 months almost.

As a brief background - we’ve had issues since we moved in, in September of 2021, with the children on this street targeting our home. Throwing things at our windows, going out of their way to shout racial slurs at my husband (he is mixed race, I am white) the kids have even gone as far as to following my Dh on his way to the shop whilst screaming at him.

We are the only ones on this road who don’t rent from the council so therefore you’d think it would be easier for us to leave but it hasn’t been at all. I’m still searching for a new property after posting to mumsnet months ago about it and now there are new developments :( I can barely even type this I’m devastated.

My neighbour next door (with one of the unruly children herself) took a parcel in for us yesterday. I was being nosey (god I wish I hadn’t been!!!) and decided to check her Facebook as I hadn’t previously known her name. I figured actually I could maybe message her about her child as we have grounds to believe he recently played a part in slashing my husbands tyres.
This woman is stupid enough to have her Facebook profile completely open to the public and has repeatedly written statuses about myself, DH and our children for weeks now. So now we know why the children on this street target us. Fellow neighbours were also commenting underneath blatantly slating our children (who are literal babies) even though their own children who are between the ages of 10-13 are borderline criminals.

Thursday the neighbour wrote a status saying that our baby had been ‘screaming all night’ and she was contacting social services. Someone (another neighbour) had commented underneath saying she agreed that they needed to be contacted as ‘that poor baby is always screaming it breaks my heart to hear it!’ (Meanwhile her own 5 year old roams the streets on his own all day; every day in winter)
Our youngest son is a screamer that’s for sure. He has issues with being clingy (what baby doesn’t??) and we recently moved him into his own bedroom. We’ve definitely had more than a few nights of him screaming and fussing. I always go straight to him but it doesn’t make any odds as usually he is so distraught that it takes a while to calm him down. He is 100% not abused. Neither of my children are. Both were conceived via IVF after years of trying and I’m truly broken to even have had this assumed of us. Ive done nothing but cry all night.

The neighbour updated them all to say she had made a referral and it would be left with SS now. Obviously it’s the weekend so I guess I have to expect a call on Monday from them. I feel sick to my stomach. Can’t sleep. Been crying all night.

The neighbour has also written statuses about how she wishes her friend had never moved out of our house because the neighbours (us) that have replaced the friend are ‘weird’ and ‘freaks’
We are an innocent family trying to live our lives. I had to fight everything in me not to message her but I didn’t.
She had also posted a few months ago about how me and DH were always loudly arguing in our living room - again not true. I have a brain injury. I’m most definitely never up for arguing these days and spend 98% of my time in bed. Our marriage is also fantastic and he’s the most wonderful husband and father.

So these women are literally slandering me and DH publicly via Facebook, reporting us to SS and whatever else - all whilst their children roam freely from 9am until 9pm in all weathers causing trouble and damaging our property and vehicles. One of the children is only around 5-6 years old and is always seen hanging around with 12-13 year olds. Surely social services should be contacted about THEM and not us?

I’ve had a good cry to DH tonight and he’s now going to really crack down and help me find another house for us, previously he was on the fence about moving and wasn’t really pulling his weight. He was hoping that it would all go away but clearly it’s just getting worse.

Has anyone got any advice? I’m so sad and so angry. I don’t know where to put myself tonight. I’m terrified my beautiful, innocent boys will now have social services involvement when we’ve only ever done the very best for them. Our eldest goes to nursery and is thriving, our youngest is ahead of all his milestones. I’ve never even once raised my voice at them and neither has DH. I can’t even put into words how sad I am tonight. What does social services do with reports like these?

I am assuming you took screen shots of all this and reported them to the Police? Social care has better things to deal with than this. You will possibly get a visit or phone call and have chance to state what is going on. If they do visit, you might get help to move out the area so it could be a benefit. I have been reported to social care before by someone who was sleeping with my now ex husband. It was horrible but they could see it was malicious and nothing further was done.

Mollymoostoo · 23/01/2022 09:03

@UsernameInTheTown

Screen shot everything on their FB and contact the police OP. This is harassment to say the least.

Social Services will help you in this instance, I've been there, malicious SS claim, and SS were brilliant.
It'll all be fine

100% this

LetsGoParty · 23/01/2022 09:05

Sorry if already suggested but have you got CCTV.
I'd consider reporting the posts to the police. Your husband is mixed
Race so there could well be a racist element to the harassment.
I'd also report the post to facebook.

Redburnett · 23/01/2022 09:05

Get screenshots of all FB posts and report to the police.
Also report every single incident of harassment by local children/adults.
Explain whole situation to SS and see if they can help you get rehoused urgently by the council.
Neighbours behaviour is absolutely disgusting and you have my sympathy.

monfuseds · 23/01/2022 09:06

I would screenshot & go to the police & report to the council.

lunar1 · 23/01/2022 09:08

I'm so sorry you are going through this.

I was reported to social services, I never did find out by who. It was for extensive bruising on my baby.

I was so upset, but it was dismissed literally the moment SS and a HV entered my house.

Ds1 had a birth mark on his face that didn't resolve until he was around 5, he also had large Mongolian blue patches on his bum going right up his back. My children are mixed race.

They saw his face and the HV just said, it's a birth mark, she then checked him over. They spent way more time consoling me than they did worrying about DS.

Regarding the housing, do you have a brain injury specialist social worker? They are able to work magic with housing issues, it might be worth asking to be referred to one.

SarahBop · 23/01/2022 09:08

DO NOT message this nasty nasty woman. I'm not surprised all their kids are feral, they sound like vile adults.

Personally, I think you should report them for the unattended kids/criminal behaviour. Also contact the police for racial abuse.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. This area doesn't deserve you, they sound like utter scum and their poor kids will just be dragged up to be exactly like their parents

Realitea · 23/01/2022 09:10

You’re going through ‘aggravated harassment’ not just harassment, due to the racial element. You and your family need support from the police and victim support under the protection of harassment act. Quote that. Send them as much evidence as you have and keep a diary of events with dates and times. For past events, list them with approximate dates and times. Then report the same to the council for antisocial behaviour and harassment. Get your Dh to do exactly the same.
Then screenshot all the Facebook posts as they also fall under harassment. Anything written and published, spoken or physical harassment counts.
Social services will put the report down to a malicious report and it will also go against the neighbours in the harassment claim. Act now and get this stopped. You can do it!

CurryandSnuggle · 23/01/2022 09:10

Please report this as a hate crime. It might make it stop while you can look for somewhere else to live. I'm so sorry you're having to go through this, no one should have to experience this just for living and being who they are. Disgraceful!

Bringsexyback · 23/01/2022 09:11

I’m sure somebody’s already said this but honestly don’t worry about it social services might call you they might even pop round it’ll be a five minute job and they will see through these neighbours. They may even help you to get out of there or have some advice on how to deal with their disgusting behaviour.

SpookyScarySkeletons · 23/01/2022 09:11

@KloppsTeeth

You must be raging op. But their opinions are worthless. Never take criticism from people you wouldn’t ask for advice.

This is excellent advice.

And please don't worry about SS. I have had dealings with them in the past and had no problems. They realised very quickly that our children were safe and loved.

Obviously with the recent cases they need to take every report seriously but they are very good at sniffing out the malicious reports.

HandforthParishCouncilClerk · 23/01/2022 09:12

Social services actually might be really helpful for you OP - they aren’t the enemy, and it must be so hard for you with a brain injury and 2 small children. They would be able to signpost you some available resources for support.

RunningInTheWind · 23/01/2022 09:12

Depending on where you are and general availability, it may well be worth applying for council/HA in grounds of medical needs.

The first I knew about being reported to SS was a knock at my door on a Friday night with SS and police involved. The kids were bouncing all over the sofas at the delight of visitors, showing off and offering cakes they’d made that afternoon.

The SW said he’d “seen enough” and had no concerns.

It was extremely upsetting for me that someone would’ve done that - although I had nothing to hide and it was obvious to them the kids were happy and well-cared for.

SS have a hard enough time wrangling kids off the truly shit parents - never mind those who have a nap during eastenders!

Your neighbours probably hate you BECAUSE you’re so normal … will be making their sub-conscious twitch. They’ll be able to smell the normality on you.

INeedNewShoes · 23/01/2022 09:13

If SS do contact you OP, I would steer clear of a tit for tat approach re reporting your neighbours. If you had genuine concerns about any of these children you should have reported it on its own merit before now rather than as a retaliation on your neighbours for reporting you. Focus on your own family right now.

I would screen shot any Facebook posts made by the neighbours in question and do a print out to hand to SS.

I would ask SS for their support in moving to a new house. There may be something they can do to help although it may be through the local authority so you’ll have to let go of your snobbery.

Please avoid sneering about the fact you’re the only house who privately rent and the rest of them being LA tenants. The vast majority of people who rent through the LA (and pay to do so!) are good citizens and you give the impression that you would expect trouble from them. Not nice.