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Original poster

Does anyone follow Deborah James? (AKA Bowel Babe)

184 replies

NoWigNoWit · 14/01/2022 07:43

www.instagram.com/bowelbabe/p/CYr47RBoWRv/?utm_medium=share_sheet

I’ve been following her for a few years now and this is her latest update. She’s such an incredible and inspirational woman.

I don’t know her whatsoever but it’s made feel sad reading this and I have everything crossed for her she makes a speedy recovery.

(Not sure if this will link!)

OP posts:
Stomacharmeleon · 18/02/2022 11:27

I know this is very much a 'me' thing but they feel like yet another gang/ clique I am not invited too. Even the horrible illness I have I don't feel cool enough.
Patient with bowel tumour/ stoma/ cancer also in thyroid/ glands/ behind breast bone.
Grumpy and tired cow today... (aged 43) been ill at different stages Seven years.

Fruitlesscalisthenics · 18/02/2022 19:01

That sounds very tough going Stomacharmeleon Flowers

FMLpassthegin · 25/02/2022 20:19

I agree I would really like to see this thread deleted. A) I hate the thought of her reading all the horrible comments made. B) All the more I hate that if her children or their friends were googling - and I know her daughter is pretty proficient online - well
I would hate them to come across this thread. I wish people could be more sensitive to peoples feelings, kinder and less judge-y. If you've got nothing nice to say - say nothing? Why hurt people online?

Snowred1 · 25/02/2022 20:34

I follow her. I listen to the You, Me Big C podcast too. I’ve had cancer. I had NHS treatment and they were fantastic. At the time of my cancer I had two small children so can relate to her. When I had cancer this podcast wasn’t around nor had she been diagnosed but I would meet other people with cancer to talk too. It’s different than taking to friends without cancer. I would go to gigs with my bald head during chemo and night outs. I also went on every school trip I could to just be around my kids as much as I could. There’s no right or wrong way of doing cancer. Everyone is different and no one has the right to judge whether or not you have had cancer.

GoingOnce · 09/05/2022 19:01

Very sad update from Deborah on her Instagram today. She has reached the end of the road and is on hospice at home care.

ureterr1blemuriel · 09/05/2022 19:37

Oh my goodness, I’ve just read it. How terribly sad - she is so inspirational

Cantsleepwontsleep000 · 09/05/2022 21:08

Absolutely gutted for Deb and her family. Can’t actually believe it either. Have followed her for years with the podcast etc.

TwoBigNoisyBoys · 09/05/2022 21:17

Terribly sad news. My heart goes out to her and her family.

Radyward · 09/05/2022 21:18

I just loved her outlook and positivity. So sad
Poor Deborah

Cantsleepwontsleep000 · 09/05/2022 21:23

Imagine how Lauren feels now :(

Narwhalelife · 09/05/2022 22:19

Has anyone seen the latest update - I honestly felt so so sad reading it. Devastating for her & her family 😔

ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 09/05/2022 22:53

I thought she would go on forever. Her positivity and outlook made you think that. I am so upset to read her latest post.

AbsolutelyLoveIy · 10/05/2022 10:00

Poor woman. I don’t know how people
manage battling terminal illness for such a
long time. The psychological burden must be completely overwhelming.

TequilaShot · 10/05/2022 10:09

It is so heartbreaking. I feel so much for her family and children, but gosh what a legacy! They must feel incredibly proud. I had a relative who battled for 10 years and you do believe that that time will never come.

NotMyselfWithoutCoffee · 10/05/2022 10:32

I feel so heartbroken for her family especially her young children. Sad

childofthecorn · 10/05/2022 11:20

Well over a million now fundraised. Just astonishing. I am so gutted for her and her young family, but it does seem like she's endured a particularly gruelling and rough year so far on a horrible rollercoaster. I hope she's deeply proud

childofthecorn · 10/05/2022 11:26

When she had that awful emergency bleed she said her last wish was realising she would not be able to say goodbye properly. Hopefully there is a glimmer of consolation in being able to do that now.

LadyDanburysHat · 10/05/2022 11:41

AbsolutelyLoveIy · 10/05/2022 10:00

Poor woman. I don’t know how people
manage battling terminal illness for such a
long time. The psychological burden must be completely overwhelming.

I think her way of posting and her positivity have really made it feel like that. I thought a few weeks ago that she looked particularly ill, gaunt and pale, and I did wonder if there was much more they could do.

I can't begin to imagine going home to die. It is such a difficult concept to wrap your head around if you have not experienced it.

It is so awful for her poor children and the rest of her family. Despite her seeing her children to older ages than she expected. They are still young.

Original poster
NoWigNoWit · 10/05/2022 18:26

Absolutely heartbreaking. I hope her children and husband know how many lives she impacted, and will continue to do so with her BowelBabe fund.

I also hope that those upthread who were being disgusting and resentful about her, her treatment and general persona donate too.

OP posts:
mids2019 · 14/05/2022 13:03

I think there is a general point about the representation of cancer generally in society.

The vast majority of cancer sufferers are elderly and there are a disproportionate number of people who are relatively poor or have lifestyles which may have increased their chances of cancer development e.g. obesity.

Every cancer sufferers is worthy of praise and each has their own horrendous journey to face. Some may not collect for charity but all are worthy of recognition.

I think we have to reflect on the often dire financial circumstances cancer can leave families in and ensure as well as cutting edge research we mitigate to real risks of poverty that can be added to family's anguish.

It's always rest to raise a profile of a disease and charity giving is great too but we just have to be a little careful of the way cancer in general society is portrayed.

RainySnows99 · 16/05/2022 04:21

I admire her , I have 2 stoma's and 3 of my family have died from bowel cancer at young ages .However - her recent comment that she plans to die with a huge smile on her face and drinking champagne is very naive .All 3 of my relatives were unrecognisable near the end .They could only grimace and ride the pain .I don't think she has shown the reality of the disease as lived by most people , but I wish her a peaceful and quick end .

lollipoprainbow · 16/05/2022 06:41

@RainySnows99 agreed, my sister died a terrible death from cancer and she was always so vivacious like Deborah. I'm sure she would have loved to die drinking champagne surrounded by her family but sadly that wasn't the reality it was ghastly.

AbsolutelyLoveIy · 16/05/2022 07:29

She has young children who will read everything she writes - this is probably what’s behind the champagne death scenario. she’s not that naive and neither are most people reading it.

She”S fronting it out for their sake.

WTFGG · 16/05/2022 08:41

Can’t believe that posters on here are criticising her for not dying painfully enough !! FFS !!
If you were facing your final days wouldn’t you hope for it to be painless and peaceful!! We should all have a “good” death !!
I lost a parent to cancer and it was peaceful with the right pain relief and sedation.
And yes, remember she has two teenager children who will read everything !!
Posters on here really need to give their heads a wobble !!

Blackbird2020 · 16/05/2022 08:55

Didn’t take long for it to start again… the “I feel terrible for her, but I/my relative was in more pain, sicker etc… She’s not showing the reality of cancer.”

She is showing the reality of cancer, FOR HER.