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Original poster

I'm waiting for the police to call.

267 replies

grecianurn82 · 25/12/2021 10:40

Sorry for bringing the mood down but i don't feel like i can talk to anyone in real life yet. To cut a long story short I haven't heard from my ex sunce Tuesday, we have 2 young children sonthis is very out of character. His phone appears to be off for the last 24 hours. He has adult children who text me this morning concerned as they hadn't heard from him. They've asked the police to call to do a welfare check. We're waiting for news. Its surreal, I'm here with the kids and their presents knowing that there's a good chance something awful has happened. Their dad wouldnt be in good health and has a history of addiction issues. I don't know why I'm posting, I've told my mum but I'm playing down how worried i am as she has family there and she's busy.

OP posts:
rocky1914 · 25/12/2021 11:31

Oh my.. I'm so sorry to hear this OP. My heart just skipped a beat. Yes, definitely have the police do a welfare check and then if nothing comes of it, please make they escalate the matter, adult or not, he should still be a priority. Honestly, this is horrible and I feel awful for you and the little ones. Please keep us updated on here as I'm going to be anxious about this for the rest of the day. I don't mean that in a bad way btw, so please don't feel bad, I literally just feel so horrible for you and this won't leave my mind until I know he is okay. Sending you nothing but love and positive thoughts Thanks

Bearsbearsbears40 · 25/12/2021 11:31

Wishing you all the best OP FlowersBrew

Misspacorabanne · 25/12/2021 11:33

Offering a hand hold op! Hoping he gets in touch today and it's not the news your thinking.

FallonCarringtonWannabe · 25/12/2021 11:33

This sounds very difficult, especially with police unable to do anything right now.

pointythings · 25/12/2021 11:33

That's really poor of the police. My late husband was also an alcohol addict and when my cousins went over to see him and didn't get a response, they asked for a welfare check and the police were there in about 10 minutes (though to be fair not Christmas Day). He was fine, just drunk.

Later on when I was on holiday with the kids and his neighbours hadn't heard from him for a while and smelled a smell, they called the police and got a really quick response. Unfortunately on that occasion the news was not good.

Gazelda · 25/12/2021 11:33

Any chance you could go to your mums earlier? Or would that disrupt DC's routine/expectations too much?
I'm just thinking it might be (slightly) easier for you to be with other people at the moment. You must be so worried and frustrated at not knowing.
Thinking of you today OP.

Mummapenguin20 · 25/12/2021 11:34

Hand hold x

Cornettoninja · 25/12/2021 11:35

Gosh OP, this is such a horrible situation for you to be in, the anxiety is just all consuming isn’t it?

I’ve had cause to request welfare checks for someone previously but the police have always forced enter because of known health conditions, I would have been climbing the walls if they couldn’t/didn’t.

I don’t know how much you want to push it but I do think it would be reasonable to go back to the police and get it on record you’re concerned about his well-being due to the alcoholism and that he may be injured/ill and lives alone. Two days is a long time if someone needs help.

PurplePansy05 · 25/12/2021 11:36

OP did you call the police again and explain he is at risk and why? You've had very good advice on this thread. The police can't ignore such report and he should be checked upon as a priority. What did the police say?

wtfisgoingonhere21 · 25/12/2021 11:37

Op this is awful for you Confused

Call the police back and explain how out of character it is etc and try and push for them to check today.

That's very odd for them to say to leave it another couple of days.

He's vulnerable. They should be checking him

TidyDancer · 25/12/2021 11:42

Oh OP, what a dreadful thing to have to go through. I think I would call the police back and say you believe him to be a risk to himself, I don't think waiting two days is acceptable or even sensible.

Flowers500 · 25/12/2021 11:44

You need to insist with the police. Their behaviour os absolutely shocking, they could literally be leaving a man to die unnecessarily. They deserve to be in a hell of a lot of hot water over this

MolkosTeenageAngst · 25/12/2021 11:44

I’m sorry, that is such a worry and I am surprised they won’t do anything considering all of his family are worried. I’m assuming it’s not possible to see into any of his windows from the road?

astoundedgoat · 25/12/2021 11:45

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It seems extraordinary that given that he is "vulnerable" in a way, the police don't take it more seriously.

fortifiedwithtea · 25/12/2021 11:46

Hand hold for you OP. Fingers crossed he will make contact with someone soon. Then have a talk to him about the need for a spare set of keys .

WingingItSince1973 · 25/12/2021 11:47

So sorry. Hope you hear something soon. I agree that the Police need it enforcing what a risk he is to himself. You can only do what you can xxx

Scrooge89 · 25/12/2021 11:48

Hope he’s ok

bonfireheart · 25/12/2021 11:49

Does ex have any siblings himself who could go an knock all the doors until they get let in?

peridito · 25/12/2021 11:49

How far away is he from you/your mums ? Can you leave children at mums and go round there ?
If other appartments in building can you gain access to his flat front door ? Emergency locksmith to drill his lock ? ( £70 cost in London )

Bellringer · 25/12/2021 11:52

Try the local hospital, mine ended up there when he couldn't be found at home. Someone will have to go round, police to break in? Don't go alone, hoping it's 'just' a bender

Tana433 · 25/12/2021 11:54

Hope you hear something soon. Two days seems an awful long time when you know him and know this isnt a normal situation.

thenewduchessoflapland · 25/12/2021 12:00

Fingers crossed he's merely on an absolute bender and is nursing a mammoth hangover OP.

Gooseberrypies · 25/12/2021 12:05

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