Things that can fuck off

[Marianne1234]

Light hearted (sort of)

• Covid (obviously)
• late December birthdays
• Birthday parties the weekend before Christmas
• Sherry shortage in the local supermarket
• price stickers that don’t come off without leaving a mark on the item
• covid again for good measure and the fucking related anxiety about catching it this week and ruining Christmas

Gaaaaah

Lockdown talk. If there's going to be a "circuit breaker" just do it now! Don't ruin 2022 immediately. Much rather it be out of the way over Christmas.

Hair and nails and lashes and brows appointments at the same place but I wasn't able to book them together so I'll be at the same place five times in three days.

Supermarket substitutions. Don't send me half the amount! Now I need to go to the shop!

@Fuckingfuckssake

If this works I will hunt you down and take you for a massive drink!

@Marianne1234

Expensive wrapping paper that is tissue paper thin and disintegrates as soon as it is touched by scissors. Might as well have bought it in home bargains

Marks and Spencer I'm looking at you

Chickenpox. Had my eye on covid for so long forgot about this joyous curveball.

And glitter on Christmas cards.

Christmas Eve boxes
Christmas pyjamas (and people who wear them all day on 25th) 🤮
People who post pics of mountains of gifts - materialistic dicks
New Year's Eve
Christmas cards - pointless rubbish
Another lockdown

All things Covid, Brexshit and Boris related.

Christmas wrapping can fuck off too.

The twat who managed to leave dog shit on our drive can fuck off to the far side of fuck and then some. I had a dog until recently. I always cleared up their poo. I most certainly never left any on anyone else's property!!

Men assuming that if a woman raises her voice or has a strong opinion then she is clearly hysterical and needs to go a have a lie down.

Actually just the patriarchy and everyday sexism in general.

Oh yes, another lockdown or "circuit-breaker" if that happens can also fuck right off as far as I am concerned.

Clutter because I've been asking my husband to get rid of it for years and he just moves it from one place to the other.
My weight because I've been trying to get rid of it for ages but I'm a greedy cow.
Worrying about everyone and analysing everything that I say because I'm anxious in case I sound like a nob.
People standing too close to me in the supermarket and mouth breathing in my ear.
My sister because she's a fucking liar and boasts constantly about her children and puts everyone else's down.
That's it until I find something else to moan about because I'm antisocial miserable bag.

1. Northern Rail workers who walk through the train carriage checking tickets but don't say a single goddamn fucking word to the people not wearing masks or wearing masks on their chins. I mean, why make it a regulation if everyone is going treat it as a joke?

1. People who wear masks on their chins.

1. That new abomination of a Christmas song from Elton John.

1. Elton John

Christmas themed gifts as a Christmas present. No, give me that shit in November.

My son getting a positive LFT on the day we were due to travel to the grandparents for Christmas.

That can fuck off to the far side of fuck and then fuck off some more

And AJ and Kai not being in the Strictly Final.

Slow drivers,
Thinking about and cooking dinner every bastard night,
The price of fuel,
My job, that can fucking fuck right off,
'Be Kind' 🤬

When men on TV, film or stage etc. stop women walking away from them by grabbing their arm to physically restrain them. Men never do this to men. Once you notice it, you see it often, it needs to stop.

Face masks can fuck off too.

The idiot who rearended me last week and the ensuing post accident aggro.

Short winter days and long, dark nights of this time of year can also get to fuck! In fact, they should be banned completely. Bring on British Summer Time.

Pretending that I’m looking forward to spending Christmas with my parents.
Them: ‘What are you doing for Christmas?’
Me: ‘seeing my parents’ SMILE
(I don’t want to go I don’t want to go I don’t want to go)

Cling film that won't cling

Boris Johnson
Covid
Door handles that grab your sleeves and rip them
Socks that get lost in the washing machine
Pens - they have already all fucked off, as I can't find any...

Everything that could need attention on the car wanting done at the same time just before christmas.

1. Covid fucking up life again
2. SIL
3. MIL
4. DH
5. Those puddles of water on the underside of mugs in the dishwasher
6. Cooking and shopping and laundry and thinking for everyone all the time
7. Everyone thinking they can chill because it’s the holidays, with me facilitating their chill at the expense of my own chill
8. Fucking Amazon
9. Covid

Wasps

The DVLA

Dry skin from the cold and central heating can do one

10. Anyone who refuses to take responsibility for themselves. Especially when they get called out on it then squeal about their mental health.

Having my mot booked 4 days before Xmas can go f itself