Things you can’t resist answering in the same way each time you hear? (Light hearted thread)

[Wouldcouldcantwont]

Hi I’ve just found myself responding to the end of a song and I realise there’s a couple of things I HAVE to reply to each time.

At the end of Cuntry Boys & City Girls (correct spelling!) by the Fratellis a little voice says “Thanks for listening” and I have to say “You’re welcome”. Also, every time a character on Holby or Casualty uses the defibrillator and says “shocking” I reply “isn’t it?”. The family thinks there’s something wrong if miss one.

I’m hoping that I’m not the only person who has these replies!

Mine is if someone says "Question.." I can't help but interrupt and say " Tell me what you think about Me?" (Destiny's Child, Independent Women)

@kennythekangaroo Me too!! Fellow shoppers look at me like I've lost the plot

When one of the family comes in and says 'Hello' I either reply with 'Is it me you're looking for?' (al la Lionel Ritchie) or 'Cliveeee' (like Margarita Pracatan - really showing my age!).

I also love that our DCs are joining in even though they're too young to remember the originals. Keeping the traditions going lol.

My teen DS told me everyone in his yr 11 class started copying him saying "language, Timothy" if anyone swore (state comp so quite often 🤣).

I also do "course you can, Malcolm" and "Basiiiil".

Oh and another one, when anyone says "question...", I reply "nominate"

Similar to Arthur, if the name Gary comes up in conversation we channel 'Gary' from Only Fools and Horses (the bloke they accidentally kidnapped who spoke no English other than 'Gary' ) and blurt the name in a random, uncomprehending tone.

If DH or I say "What are you doing?" The answer is always "Baking a fucking cake". Long story that came about one weekend when we were moving house.

@Kerzehmet 🤣

@ArblemarzipanTFruitcake

Similar to Arthur, if the name Gary comes up in conversation we channel 'Gary' from Only Fools and Horses (the bloke they accidentally kidnapped who spoke no English other than 'Gary' ) and blurt the name in a random, uncomprehending tone.

Same with the name Dan after that Alan Partridge sketch 🤣

😂 I do the ‘I’ll have a tea please Bob’

We say I need a pee please Bob when we go to the loo.

If the answer to ‘where is ….?’ Is to check in a pocket, I always have to say ‘what has it got in its pocketses’ in a Gollum voice.

If someone says 'I've had an idea' or 'I've been thinking' I say 'did it hurt?'

If you get the knives and forks out you have to say 'ah!! I see you've played Knifey spoony before!'

We also, if something has been lost, say it's up your bum. I thought we were the only ones

I have to physically stop myself saluting the General Waste bin at work.
Whenever I take the recycling out, I have to say testily "I'm doing the bins!" like the refuse collector in Paddington 2.
Too many Withnail ones to mention - although "What fucker said THAT?" comes in handy more often than you might think 😁

Oh! And whenever 20th century fox comes on before a film you have to do the dah dah dah dahhh, dah dah dah dahhhhh, DAH DAH DAH DAAHHHH like Ralf in the simpsons movie

If a programme is HBO you have to do the AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA sound with it

We do lots of these.

If someone says it’s cold outside, I sing “there’s no kind of atmosphere”.

I do “language Timothy.” Or “watch your profanity!” which I think is from a reel a few years back.

If someone says “he’s a teacher/reporter/that guy off the telly” I say “no he’s not the messiah, he’s a very naughty boy”.

@Needhelp101

I have to physically stop myself saluting the General Waste bin at work. Whenever I take the recycling out, I have to say testily "I'm doing the bins!" like the refuse collector in Paddington 2. Too many Withnail ones to mention - although "What fucker said THAT?" comes in handy more often than you might think 😁

"You can stick it up your arse for nothing and fuck off while you're doing it" is one of my faves.

I was stuck in a lane behind a large flock of sheep being moved across the road once and my beau at the time had legitimate cause to say "Are you the farmer?" to the chap moving them. I laughed for 20 minutes.

@AudTheDeepMinded

If giving my name for official purposes and anyone confirms the middle initial by asking 'Is that S for sugar' I immediately respond with 'No, Sarah actually' and then piss myself laughing.

I do that too!

Ours is surname based .... so if someone ends a sentence with "hardy", someone else has to say "Thomas" very quickly. Or if it's "French" then "Dawn" has to follow from someone else. I think this started at university when if one of us said "beg" (as in, beg for something) the other would say "Fischer and Dornbusch", which was our Economics text book.

I can't remember how it came about now, but long ago something made my oh and I fall into a trap that went like this:

Person 1 upon not hearing something that was said, "What did you say?"

Person A "I said that..." and the rule was the pause had to be filed by person 1 singing "time may change me, but I can't change time". It was some David Bowie song that I can't place just now.

Another thing we do in our house, when a TV announcer says, "This programme contains strong language", we always shout "Bum!" Totally childish.

So many! Stop: Hammertime, or sometimes 'in the name of love'. Language Timothy, and Don't panic: Mr Mainwaring. Right: said Fred.

If an emergency vehicle sounds it's siren, it's 'you'll never sell many ice creams going at that speed, will you?'

If in the course of conversation one of me or my friends says, 'Question' the only response is 'Tell me what you think about me'

(destiny's child)

If husband asks where something is in the house and I respond by saying 'there' whilst pointing, he'll respond 'where?' and I sing 'right there, a little mouse with clogs on'.