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Original poster

Friend is hijacking our weekend away with her Body Shop shite

698 replies

Youngatheart00 · 07/11/2021 15:44

In a fortnights time DH and I are going away with some other friends for a weekend away in a cottage. One of my friends has recently joined the Body shop cult at home and has been pushing it any excuse she gets.

She’s now suggested the girls in the group have a ‘pamper evening’ which basically just means her trying to sell to us. Of the 8 of us, 2 have already said ‘great idea can’t wait’ and another ive spoken to isn’t keen on the products but wants to support her. I don’t want to fall out over this but I really don’t want to waste a Saturday night when I don’t agree with MLM and hate what it’s doing to my friend!!

How to approach this tactfully?

OP posts:
tallduckandhandsome · 07/11/2021 18:08

”ok, no issue with doing this but we will need to keep an eye on the time as we won’t be back from (daytime activity) until 6 and I know DCs will be wanting tea / bath and then I think we are eating about half 8. I’m also a bit skint but I’ll take a quick look”

I agree this is too accommodating, don’t send this. I like suggestion from ChargingBuck:

"I'll be taking my wallet down the pub, because I've been looking forward to seeing you all together for the first time since covid, so I wasn't expecting to be segregated by sex & asked to attend a sales event. I'm sure that those who want to attend will do so, but it's not something I anticipated, & would prefer to be doing holiday things on this weekend. Am sure everyone who's interested will have fun though. smile"

DaphneDeloresMoorhead · 07/11/2021 18:08

I hate anything involving spas, beauty treatments, massages or "pampering". A shitty evening being flogged BSAH products is literally one of the worst things I could think of spending my evening doing. I'd rather watch Rimmer's collection of photos of telegraph poles.
There's no chance I'd be staying in doing it. No chance on gods green earth.

QueeniesCroft · 07/11/2021 18:09

I admire the tact of other posters! I'd have said something like " I love you and I value your friendship, but please don't try to sell to me".

Sometimes, tact is too blunt an instrument and you need to be very clear and leave absolutely no room for "misunderstanding".

SpideySenseTingles · 07/11/2021 18:09

Your reply is inviting her to find a time in the weekend where she will have longer to do her pitch.

Be honest.

"Pamper night is not my thing but you guys go ahead. I'm happy going to the pub with the guys. "

tallduckandhandsome · 07/11/2021 18:09

@Redlorryyellowlorryblue

I’d purchase a tube of nail cream that I like and use from her earlier in the day and go out for the evening. Supportive, productive and then doing what you want.
No way. As pp says, do not support an MLM at all.
MeredithGreyishblue · 07/11/2021 18:09

You need to be blunt and firm. Don't worry about her feelings on the matter. She wasn't bothered about pressuring you to give her money!

tallduckandhandsome · 07/11/2021 18:09

@SpideySenseTingles

Your reply is inviting her to find a time in the weekend where she will have longer to do her pitch.

Be honest.

"Pamper night is not my thing but you guys go ahead. I'm happy going to the pub with the guys. "

Short and sweet, great!
NotJustACigar · 07/11/2021 18:10

@10yearwarranty

You could add... maybe those who want to stay in for the Body Shop meet up could keep an eye on the kids. Anyone who doesn't want to do that could go to a pub?
Wow I absolutely love this - if you send it to the group you may well manage to out-CF a CF!!!!
BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 07/11/2021 18:11

Tell her that it's not your thing at all and suggest that she 'set up shop' in her bedroom so that she's not in the way of everyone generally and those who are interested can pop in to see what she has to offer.

EdgeOfTheSky · 07/11/2021 18:11

I’d be saying “LOL no way! I’m looking forward to a weekend getting away from shopping, we can do that back home. Saturday night I will be chilling, and enjoying a big glass of wine in anticipation of XXX’s fabulous dinner”

DaphneDeloresMoorhead · 07/11/2021 18:11

Im known for being pretty blunt so, given everyone that knows me knows I don't "do" beauty treatments or "grooming" I'd just say "count me out, i'm going down the pub"

But then none of the 3 friends I'd be willing to spend a weekend with would ever flog BSAH..

RampantIvy · 07/11/2021 18:12

You have had loads of replies here that are a polite but blunt no without offending, so please use one of those, not one of the wishy washy ones where she will try and find a way round to persudae you.

It is better sorted out now before you go than when you are all there because it will cause bad feeling and resentment.

ChimChimeny · 07/11/2021 18:12

I'm not really up for this. We've already got a nice meal planned - cooked by x and y - and I think after that it would be lovely to just relax, drink wine and have a nice catch up. We haven't seen each other for ages.

I think this is good, not too waffly but still polite. Maybe add something about arranging a sales evening back home for those who want to

HermioneKipper · 07/11/2021 18:13

I will never give the body shop another penny after they stuck the boot in to JK Rowling. Arseholes.

Friend is a cheeky fucker. I’d be reevaluating the friendship.

So glad you’ve got someone else on board

MrsTerryPratchett · 07/11/2021 18:14

Don't be subtle, they are trained to bulldoze that.

I'd go to to the pub and recruit whomever wants to join me.

CtrlU · 07/11/2021 18:14

[quote tallduckandhandsome]@CtrlU

My answer is still valid though.

Well not really.

Either don’t go for the weekend away or when the pamper party is happening - excuse yourself somewhere else.

Don’t go on the weekend she’s paid a lot of money for?

Hide herself in a room because she doesn’t want the get together to be hijacked by a pyramid scheme?

The cottage is surely not in the middle of nowhere. And if it is where there’s no option to do/ go somewhere else for the evening - even more reason to stay home

And waste all that money? Fuck that. Much better to rally the troops against the pyramid schemer.[/quote]
Although I came here to make suggestions to the OP; you are obviously bored tonight and need some attention so I’ll give you your 5 mins before I get on with way more important things

-Nobody but YOU suggested the OP locking herself in the bedroom. I simply suggested if she doesn’t want to join the pamper party she can use it as an excuse to do something else.

Choosing to go to the pub, going out to eat or something else she may enjoy is hardly wasting money is it? It’s choosing to spend her time doing something She would enjoy rather than sitting in the room, bored listening to sales tactics and reason‘s why to buy the products.

Now find someone else to debate with. I certainly don’t care to discuss anything with you. I’m here replying to the OP.

There’s always one Hmm

rookiemere · 07/11/2021 18:14

I'd just echo everyone else's responses. It's bloody cheeky to ambush your weekend away and turn it into a sales opportunity. Your proposed response is far too nice - and also untrue - you do have a problem with this,
I'd go with the "so looking forward to catching up with everyone line "and I do like the subtle nuance of "organising an evening when we get home, for those who'd like to do it".

EdgeOfTheSky · 07/11/2021 18:15

Pamper night is not my thing but you guys go ahead. I'm happy going to the pub with the guys

And this.

What would you be doing on the Saturday night if this tireless entrepreneur was not planning to profiteer?

Please don’t tell me the men would be in the pub and you would be doing childcare?

I would really object to her plan to have a ‘ladies’ event.

But I hate any mentioning of ‘pampering’ anyway.

Cheeseandlobster · 07/11/2021 18:17

So rude. I bet once you and the other lady say no, more will follow suit

CtrlU · 07/11/2021 18:17

I have a feeling a lot of the other people going also won’t be feeling this ‘pamper party’ and you may find if the majority of you guys aren’t you to hearing her sales pitch - she probably won’t even bother.

courtshoe · 07/11/2021 18:18

It's absolutely disgraceful that a good friend is taking advantage of you all in this way. No way should be targeting you all as potential customers. And you shouldn't be letting her get away with it.
Be honest but firm and polite.
You've had a few good potential responses from previous posters.

Qwertykeys · 07/11/2021 18:21

Just tell her this is a break to catch up , please leave her work at home as everyone else is .

ChargingBuck · 07/11/2021 18:21

Alternatively -

"We've all spent a lot of money on this weekend away, & haven't got together properly since before covid. We've only got 2 nights, so I'm reluctant to spend 1 of them talking about business - we're meant to all be on holiday!
Also - we're not getting back til 6 that night, & Couple are cooking a special meal for 8.30pm.
Pam - why not schedule this pamper event with people who are genuinely interested, when we're all back home? Not sure about anyone else, but I'm not up for Body Shop stuff, pm me for reasons if you want to know why."

Ellmau · 07/11/2021 18:24

I would say:

"Not really for me, I'm afraid - and obviously no one should feel pressured into buying anything!!"

Hetyanni · 07/11/2021 18:24

I would message

I'm so looking forward to this weekend and, I don't want to be rude, but can we not spend Saturday being sold stuff? I think a pamper evening is a great idea but let's do it another time, this weekend I just really want to catch up with you all!