Was this normal in the 90's

[sparklybin]

I'm trying to sort in my head some of the things my parents did when me and siblings were growing up to see what was normal and was was not.

When my parents used to go into town ie the high street, if they had their shopping to do or something like a bank appointment they would drop us at the toy store and leave us there playing with the toys until they'd finished and then they'd come back. Probably used to leave us for about an hour but I'm not sure if it was longer. We were about 4/5 when they started doing this
I can't imagine doing this. It was early 90's though so I don't know if it was normal or not.

[quote sparklybin]@saraclara not our one because I remember the shame of being collected by the parents that left us when the store clerks were rather annoyed by it all[/quote]
Are you in the UK? @sparklybin

It's just that store clerks is not a term we use.

We'd say 'shop assistants'.

Possibly also the library. I was a massive bookworm.

"it was a ELC store. My parents can't have seen these signs..."

Realistically, how many people thought that a toy shop was free childcare?

I think some parents might have left children occupied whilst they looked at other things with the kids still in sight.

If the OP isn’t traumatised then how is it helpful telling her she ought to be?
I wasn't. Try reading the post. I said the situation 'sounded' quite traumatic. Everyone is affected by things differently of course

i have a very strong memory of standing outside woolies in the early 1970s, with a bag of crisps.

@ChocolateGingers yep in the U.K. shop assistants is right. I call them store clerks and assistants intermittently.
Probably my parents fault

the picture above was taken in 1969

We were in the 80s but older, my sister and I were probably 10+ and the younger ones weren’t left with us until older

It wasn’t normal to leave small children unattended in shops, even in toy shops! I certainly never did so!

I don't think it's sad the signs were needed @sliceofcakecupoftea

Kids used to have much more freedom. It's sad they're under constant surveillance now.

I worked in the Disney Store in the 90s. Parents used to bring their kids in, plonk them in front of the screen in the store and wander off. Probably happened once a week usually on a Saturday. We would call security and security would put a page out over the shopping centre tannoy.

Usually the parent would come back saying well I thought it was allowed.

absolutely not normal. I was a child in 80's / 90's. My parents never left us anywhere, we were dragged along to all appointments certainly no unsupervised fun in any toy shops.

where did you grow up op?

Not remotely normal or acceptable (if it were, there would have been staff employed to look after you, scores of children like you in there at the same time, and an official signing in and out policy), but your parents were not the only selfish pricks to do it. A friend worked in ELC as a Saturday job and said there were always one or two children whose parents dumped them there. One regular offender was met by a police presence on their return - serve them right.

Born in 1984. I was often left at the library in the early 90s. I'd imagine the culture shifted after Jamie Bulger

I was small in the 70s and we were never left alone in shops or libraries at that age. However, if my parents went to a pub, my sister and I were left in the pub garden with a bottle of coke and a bag of crisps. It was the only time we were allowed fizzy drinks so of course we thought it was great.

My parents were the other way around - I was born late 50s, and wasn't allowed to cross the (admittedly very busy) road outside our house until I was at least 10/11!!

It was pretty common when I was a kid, I think that's the whole reason shops started putting up signs about not leaving children unsupervised!

the change cant just have happened overnight

@MrsLargeEmbodied your parents missed a trick. Should have left you at the pick and mix. I could draw an exact picture of the inside of our Woolworths we were in there so often. Our parents were pretty cheeky.

Taught us how to quickly get the wrapper off the pick and mix sweets and dispose of them in a paper bag then shove it down the side. Also said not to eat the non wrapped sweets. Apparently they were unhygienic and anyone could have put their hands in them...

I wouldn't say that was normal in general- some PP's might've experienced it but that doesn't mean it was something most parents did. (I was born in 77 so it would've been earlier.)

As you've said, the toy shop staff could notice and then it'd be embarrassing for the parents.

The pick and mix thing is technically theft.

Your dad forgot you. (I suppose David Cameron did it once at a pub.) Then when your mum told him he'd left you there, he went out and got you without saying anything. Do you think he had mental health/alcohol issues, or was he just a bit crap but wouldn't admit it?

You waiting by the front of the store so they couldn't forget you is really sad.

My parents left me and my brother in random places when they were doing errands - the kids section of Waterstones, toy shops, the crèche at the whole food store, the park, the car...things I would never do, but their attitudes to supervision were shaped by their own childhood norms. My mum used to go to the cinema on a Saturday afternoon with her brother when they were aged 5 and 7, and they also used to get the bus from school at that age and sometimes my mum would walk instead so she could buy sweeties, Which my granny didn't seem bothered about at all!
However the forgetting is a different matter and you clearly remember feeling neglected and forgotten so there is a good chance you felt that way for a reason.

@ChocolateGingers

No it's not normal.

My kids were born in the late 1980s and there is no way I'd have left them alone in a toy shop.

Also, the nonsense about leaving prams outside shops.

You've got your timeline way out.

It was normal in the 1950s and 60s when I was born, but by the 80s and 90s, we had buggies not large prams.

I never ever saw prams outside shops in the 1980s or 90s.

It was definitely done in the 70s. I was born in the early 1970's. I know it happened to me and I can remember seeing the prams outside our local coop.

@Magicalwoodlands

I don’t know if I believe these stories about leaving without babies, if I’m honest.

I left dd1 in her pram in Boots when she was about 10 days old, having completely forgotten I had her. Luckily I was meeting my mother soon afterwards, so her horrified, ‘Where’s the baby??’ sent me scooting back in a panic - she was still fast asleep, no harm done. This was in the late 70s. Dd still finds it hilarious!

As a very small child, still unable to read, , I remember being sent with a shopping list and the money to a village shop. I just had to hand the list and money over, and vividly remember my DM once being cross because they’d sent the wrong something or other - since I couldn’t read labels I wasn’t aware.
I recently revisited the area with dh and was startled at what a relatively long walk it was, further than I remembered. This was the 1950s, though, so far fewer cars, and in any case there were no roads to cross.

At the time my DM would have been up to her eyes at home with 2 younger siblings, no car, no automatic washing machine or central heating, etc. so I can’t blame her.

I was a new mother in the 80. It wasn’t normal to leave your children unattended though I remember a lady who worked in the ELC telling me it happened from time to time.