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Was this normal in the 90's

460 replies

sparklybin · 31/10/2021 08:10

I'm trying to sort in my head some of the things my parents did when me and siblings were growing up to see what was normal and was was not.

When my parents used to go into town ie the high street, if they had their shopping to do or something like a bank appointment they would drop us at the toy store and leave us there playing with the toys until they'd finished and then they'd come back. Probably used to leave us for about an hour but I'm not sure if it was longer. We were about 4/5 when they started doing this
I can't imagine doing this. It was early 90's though so I don't know if it was normal or not.

OP posts:
freshcarnation · 31/10/2021 08:33

Yes it was definitely a thing in our town. The Early Learning centre used to have signs up telling parents not to leave their kids unattended. But there were always some on their own playing when I went in with my children

LucentBlade · 31/10/2021 08:34

Prams parked outside shops was much earlier, the 1960’s, possibly early 1970’s. This was because of coach built prams . I have photos of me sat in my silver cross pram. This photo is from the Silver cross website.

I know my ex BF Mum told me she accidentally left him outside a shop in his pram and got all the way home once before she noticed.

Was this normal in the 90's
Ozgirl75 · 31/10/2021 08:34

I was born in the late 70s and I wasn’t ever left in a shop like that, but I was dropped off for Saturday morning cinema a few times.
Also, by age 7 I was heading out to the local shops and played out all the time. I did live in a small village in the Sussex countryside though and my mum told me years later that she did worry about me but because all the kids played out she didn’t want to stifle me.

ShirazSavedMySanity · 31/10/2021 08:34

Yes, this absolutely happened to us.
The Early Learning Centre always had the wooden train track in the windows of its stores and we would be left there to play.

As we got older, we would be left in WH Smith’s to flick through the books.

I’ve never really thought anything of it, but there is no way I would ever leave my own children in the same way now.

XiCi · 31/10/2021 08:35

He left you in the supermarket and drove off Shock. How long before he came back?

I grew up in the 70s & myself & younger DB we dropped off at a cinema matinee on a Saturday & left there whilst DM did the shopping. The cinema was full of kids left the same way & adults were rare
Yes when I was little the Saturday matinee was specifically for kids. No adults ever went. We got 20p to spend in the sweet shop on the way and watched the latest kids film. It was great fun.

MrsLargeEmbodied · 31/10/2021 08:36

my dc would play at the early learning centre but i would not have left the shop

CokeZeroAddiction · 31/10/2021 08:36

I don’t recall that happening but I do remember when we went food shopping, I’d be allowed to go and hang in the toy aisle whilst my mum shopped. I’d never allow that now.

Thesearmsofmine · 31/10/2021 08:36

Absolutely not normal in the lates 80’s/early 90’s in my experience.

Enb76 · 31/10/2021 08:36

80’s for me and left in bookshops. There was a corner with beanbags, I spent many a happy hour there.

GoodnightGrandma · 31/10/2021 08:36

No, it wasn’t normal.

Ozgirl75 · 31/10/2021 08:37

My parents were very strict with me about never going off with people though as two girls my age had been murdered not too far from where we lived (Nicola Fellowes and Karen Hadaway) so my dad especially was very clear about what we shouldn’t do.
This did not stop us in any way popping into various nice old ladies’ houses in the village for a lemonade and a slice of cake on a regular basis. I shudder to think of my kids doing the same but we were absolutely fine and loved sitting with the ladies and chatting.

YoComoManzanas · 31/10/2021 08:37

No not in the town, but I was allowed to go to the village shops on my own with my pocket money from a youngish age, probably about 6ish? This was the 80s. Dad always left me and my younger sister in the toy aisle while doing the supermarket shop too. When I say left, it was more like we would ditch him to look at the the toys and then the sweets. Then find him a bit later when he had got to the toilet roll aisle before piling our finds in the trolley, being told to take them back, and then all leaving together. Two older kids were left at home alone as mum did a night shift.

sparklybin · 31/10/2021 08:37

@freshcarnation it was a ELC store. My parents can't have seen these signs...
they did get caught out once and I remember being embarrassed because the shop staff were rather irritated but my parents definitely still continued doing it even after that. I must have been about 6 by then.

OP posts:
timtam23 · 31/10/2021 08:38

We would be left in the children's section of the local library. Late 70s/early 80s. Suburban area, small library, lots of small local independent shops at that time but I don't think they would have left us in the local toy shop alone, I have no memories of being left anywhere except the library.

PeterPomegranate · 31/10/2021 08:41

I remember being left sitting on a sofa in the department store while my parents went off and did other shopping. Not sure how long for.

Also being left in the car while our mum went into Sainsbury’s.

I remember walking to the local shop by myself (crossing a busy road via a footbridge) when we lived in a house we moved from when I was 8.

This was the 1980s.

MyDcAreMarvel · 31/10/2021 08:42

Posters saying the library like that’s not normal now? The age is still 8 to leave children in the library and still very common

Tulipomania · 31/10/2021 08:42

not normal

sparklybin · 31/10/2021 08:42

@XiCi when he got home my mum asked where I was. Apparently he turned on his heel and got straight back in the car without a word to go get me.

This actually makes me laugh now even though it's not really funny. That's kind of why I'm trying to sort it out because since having my own dc I'm thinking back and wondering what on Earth!

OP posts:
WheelieBinPrincess · 31/10/2021 08:42

We’d be off on our bikes for miles too, just me and my friend, if anything awful had happened it would be a complete and utter disaster- even a broken leg would have meant one of us biking to the nearest house and begging for help! Different times.

Scarby9 · 31/10/2021 08:43

Just on the large prams topic - definitely a thing in the 1960s and 70s at least when prams were the large Silver Cross type ones.

My mum accidentally left me in my pram outside a shop and went home on the bus when I was a couple of weeks old. She just forgot she had me until she got off the bus! The only thing she could do then was to cross the road and get the next bus back to find me still parked up, fast asleep.

As a child I would always be happy left outside shops talking to the babies (which everyone did in those days - none of the outrage over strangers smiling at a child in a pushchair).

And yes, we were left in the library while mum had her hair done.

But then we walked a mile to school and a mile back without an adult at the ages of 6 and 5. It was totally normal, and we enjoyed the freedom and responsibility.

Smidge001 · 31/10/2021 08:43

It was definitely normal when I was young (80s). We'd be left in the toy shop, or the library while parents did the shopping. I still don't see an issue with it - my concern would only be about the judgement I'd receive, not that something awful would happen. But then I am quite a logical/mathematical sort who goes by probabilities

NoToast · 31/10/2021 08:43

There have been photos published in the local newspaper showing rows of prams left outside Woolworths. Similar to PP, a friend told me how she'd gone home on the bus before remembering she'd left the baby. That might have been in the 80s. I was never left in a shop but definitely locked in a car outside a pub while parents brought crisps and lemonade to us but that was rare and probably only on holiday.

XiCi · 31/10/2021 08:43

I think your stories about being continually left in public spaces for long periods, and especially the story about your father driving off and leaving you are fucking awful actually OP. This sort of thing was definitely not normal and I'm not sure how I'd feel about my parents if they had behaved like this when I was a child. I know that you're sort of passing it off as humorous but it actually sounds quite traumatic

MistandMud · 31/10/2021 08:44

@WheelieBinPrincess

We used to get left in the library looking at books while my mum did the shopping.
Yes, I was about to disagree that this was a thing and then realised that my parents would cheerfully have left us in the library, Matilda-style, from about as soon as we could read.
Magicalwoodlands · 31/10/2021 08:45

I don’t know if I believe these stories about leaving without babies, if I’m honest.