Was this normal in the 90's

[sparklybin]

I'm trying to sort in my head some of the things my parents did when me and siblings were growing up to see what was normal and was was not.

When my parents used to go into town ie the high street, if they had their shopping to do or something like a bank appointment they would drop us at the toy store and leave us there playing with the toys until they'd finished and then they'd come back. Probably used to leave us for about an hour but I'm not sure if it was longer. We were about 4/5 when they started doing this
I can't imagine doing this. It was early 90's though so I don't know if it was normal or not.

I don't think it was normal, no, well not where I lived.

I was born in 76 so child of the 80s. We lived in a village then a town. My parents never left us in the car, shop, outside, anywhere. It was the same as it is now - you look after your child.

Yes. My mum didn’t do it to me, but it was done frequently, and still being done up to 2004 when I worked in Debenhams. I remember colleagues from the toy department talking about it still happening then.

@MaybeAMoaner

I never had this happen to me but I can imagine it being very normal in the 90s

My mum told me how in the 80s you were not allowed to take prams in shops so you had to leave your baby in the pram outside the shop and this was totally normal.
Imagine doing that now!!

This was v common in my area, when I was a new baby, my mother in her sleep deprived state went to the shop, left me outside, forgot I was there and went home. I was there about an hour before it was noticed. Not ideal of course, but no one batted an eyelid in the 80's.

I don’t know, @GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER

I mean … it happened to you, it’s apparently happened to everybody. Yet I can’t imagine forgetting I had had a baby and I think it’s pretty awful.

We would get locked in the car.

Born in 1980 and was never left in any shops/library, myself and siblings were taken around the shops with dm, was left in the car outside though once we were a bit older.

I think 4 & 5 seems a bit young, but we were definitely all left alone far more in the 80s and 90s. Remember the thing about latchkey kids coming home to an empty house? Things have certainly swung (too far?) in the opposite direction, and kids seem to enjoy less independence and autonomy these days.

My children were born in the mid 90s & I've never heard of such a thing. Of course you could take prams/buggies into shops.
Early 70s I always walked to school with my neighbour (both age 5). I don't remember my mother ever taking me to school. From 9 I traveled on the underground to school either on my own or with a friend. I used to walk round to the library on my own as well.

Never in a toy shop, but I remember db and I being left in the toy isle of the 'big' tesco while mum did the food shop. We had to stay together and weren't allowed to leave that isle, can't imagine doing that to ds now..

I think it depends where you live, we lived in a very sleepy rural village and I left my DS in his pram outside a shop in 2001 , a few years later and I would leave him in the Apple Store in a shopping centre playing with iPads at around 10/11.

mid 70s were would walk home from school, over fields or roads, depending on weather, two of us

@Magicalwoodlands

I don’t know, *@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER*

I mean … it happened to you, it’s apparently happened to everybody. Yet I can’t imagine forgetting I had had a baby and I think it’s pretty awful.

I forgot I had a baby for about 30 minutes when DS was 2 weeks old. I went out for lunch with some friends and one of them was holding DS while I ate. I had a lovely lunch and when I had finished I remembered DS existed. It's actually quite easy to forget the baby when you're used to the baby being inside you rather than outside! I've never left him anywhere or otherwise neglected him since but there is no need for the judgement over a brief moment where the brain played a trick.

Never left in a toy shop but yes to the library in the 80s, I would have 11+ though, she kept my younger siblings with her. I loved it as I could get all my books in peace, they had no patience with the library and never got any

I live in the north east and when I was younger the metrocentre (shopping centre) had metroland upstairs. It had rides like a rollercoaster and dodgems and things. After school our dad would take me and my brother and buy us a pass then he would go to the pub downstairs. Probably did this from us being around 8/9 and it would have been late 90's. We absolutely loved it!

@me4real yes I view the sweets thing as theft now and cringe inside at me stealing sweets.

I think my dad was embarrassed he'd left me when my mum asked so ran straight back out to the car before she could say anything else.
When he found me he tried to pretend he was in the supermarket the whole time until I told him I'd seen him drive off.

@Magicalwoodlands

I don’t know, *@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER*

I mean … it happened to you, it’s apparently happened to everybody. Yet I can’t imagine forgetting I had had a baby and I think it’s pretty awful.

Well, I’d never have imagined it happening, either!

My children were small in the 70s and eighties no way would I have done this.

People were still leaving dc in shops alone whilst they did whatever in the early 2000s I remember Borders staff complaining about it.
It wasn't mainstream in the 90s and parents who did it i imagine were considered cheeky fuckers by the staff.

I can’t say l ever left my children born in the early 90’s unattended. And l knew no one else that did. Remember James Bulger?

My parents mostly did this when we were on caravan holiday, actually. We'd each get a pocket full of 2p and they'd leave us in the amusement arcade while they went to the pub above it. Only until our 2p ran out through, then we'd join them for a glass of pop.

@furbabymama87

My mum says in supermarkets in the late 80s/ early 90s you would see babies lined up in prams by the door while the mum went round and did the shopping. And some shops would have a baby in a pram outside. I don't remember ever being left on my own in a toy shop though.

Not in London! My children were born in the early 90s and I wouldn't have dreamed of leaving them outside while I went into a shop. Nor would I have left them alone anywhere at 4/5.

When I was a little girl in Scotland in the 1960s I vividly remember going to the shops to buy a loaf of bread for my mum. I know I was no older than 5 when this happened as we moved away from Edinburgh when I was 5 and a half. I've gone back to the street where we lived since and marvelled at the fact that I must have had to cross at least one road to get there. I also remember going out to play with other children in the street on the Meadows, which were at the foot of the street, and well out of sight of our flat. I also vividly recall being outraged when mum told me she had to take me to school and pick me up at the end of the day as the school wouldn't let me go on my own. It was near the bread shop and I had assumed I'd be going by myself.

In our new town, I regularly got the bus on my own into the town centre to go to the library. Had a latchkey, left primary school at lunchtime and went home for a bit sometimes when I was in the juniors. When we weren't at school, my brother (three years younger) and I roamed about for hours with our friends or on our own, no adult supervision of any kind, nowhere near home. I took him to the cinema at least once, involving a bus journey. This was normal. My parents were more protective than many. I know I was 9 at most as we moved again before my 10th birthday.

However, back then, roads were much quieter. Heavy car traffic has made a big difference to how much freedom children can safely have.

I was a 60s/70s child and whilst my DM was rubbish she didnt do this. My DS was 1994 and I never left him for a second.

I don't think it was normal.

The thing about no prams in shops, was probably down to the fact that prams were so often of the big, Silver Cross type and took up so much more room.
How often do you ever see one of those nowadays?

I grew up in the 90's and I recall friends being dropped off at the library etc to play while their parents went shopping.

My parents never did this and I think they were the exception to the rule where we lived as it was something that seemed quite normal to everyone else. My parents were police officers though and they'd dealt with numerous missing children cases over the years so that likely influenced their parenting style.

Not for us n the 80s or 90s with our children (nor my parents to us in 1960s). An hour alone in a toy shop for 60 minutes is a bit much! A 10 year old I suppose left in Harrods toy section for 10 minutes whilst a parent goes to the food counter might be slightly more acceptable but not even sure we would have done that - we used to take the children when little there but never left them.

However I was then and now as were our parents happy to let them go to the park alone around age 10 with siblings near the house and the same with my twins to play in the woods opposite the house from around age 10 ish.