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Was this normal in the 90's

460 replies

sparklybin · 31/10/2021 08:10

I'm trying to sort in my head some of the things my parents did when me and siblings were growing up to see what was normal and was was not.

When my parents used to go into town ie the high street, if they had their shopping to do or something like a bank appointment they would drop us at the toy store and leave us there playing with the toys until they'd finished and then they'd come back. Probably used to leave us for about an hour but I'm not sure if it was longer. We were about 4/5 when they started doing this
I can't imagine doing this. It was early 90's though so I don't know if it was normal or not.

OP posts:
WheelieBinPrincess · 31/10/2021 08:25

And I used to walk to the shop by myself age 6/7. One small road to cross and ten min there ten minutes back. In about 1992. Can’t imagine that happening now.

ThirdElephant · 31/10/2021 08:25

We got left in the library while DM went shopping. No idea how old we were though.

XiCi · 31/10/2021 08:25

I dont think it was normal at all, no. I was pretty shocked to read your story tbh

My mum told me how in the 80s you were not allowed to take prams in shops so you had to leave your baby in the pram outside the shop and this was totally normal

Think this was more 1970s and earlier. The only reason was that prams were massive contraptions that wouldn't come close to fitting in a shop so they had no choice but to leave them outside and nip in. Likely to be a nip in to a local shop in those days, its not like everyone was leaving their babies with the trollies at Asda and doing a weekly shop

LucentBlade · 31/10/2021 08:26

In the 1970’s we were left to our own devices. I remember being 9 and looking after my sister who was 6 and my niece who was 8 for hours and roaming for miles. We got told off once for swimming in the sea in January in the snow. I had a very unusual childhood overall.

I don’t think it was normal at all.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 31/10/2021 08:26

It was normal in the 70s!

ParmigianoReggiano · 31/10/2021 08:27

My brother and I used to walk to school alone when I was 4 and he was 5 - it was very close, but did involve crossing two roads! This was London in the late 70s.

thequeenofsandwich · 31/10/2021 08:27

My first child was born in 91 and our local post office and also the newsagents had signs in the window saying No Prams
I did leave him outside only once , came out to find 2 schoolgirls cuddling him and cooing over him
After that the pram stayed outside and I had to array him in

ChloeR81 · 31/10/2021 08:27

My mum frequently did this with us, from around age 6 ish I’d say…so late 80s/ early 90s. Left in the library for a few hours, or looking at the toys or kids magazines in the supermarket whilst they did the shopping…it felt pretty normal at the time 🤷‍♀️

RockinHorseShit · 31/10/2021 08:27

Not normal no, but definitely a thing some parents would still do as a throwback from their parents generation. I grew up in the 70s & myself & younger DB we dropped off at a cinema matinee on a Saturday & left there whilst DM did the shopping. The cinema was full of kids left the same way & adults were rare. I was 7 & DB 3 when we were first left there.

Some parents will still do this sort of thing. It's one of the reasons I decided face painting was a PITA. I lost count of the number of parents that would dump their kids on my stall & head off to the beer tent Confused

MrsLargeEmbodied · 31/10/2021 08:28

when were you born op?

NorthernChinchilla · 31/10/2021 08:28

Yep, Dad used to leave me in the kids section in Waterstones for quite some time.
Central Manchester Grin

This would have been late 80s

ThirdElephant · 31/10/2021 08:28

@LucentBlade

In the 1970’s we were left to our own devices. I remember being 9 and looking after my sister who was 6 and my niece who was 8 for hours and roaming for miles. We got told off once for swimming in the sea in January in the snow. I had a very unusual childhood overall.

I don’t think it was normal at all.

My DF was a seventies kid and from about age 5 they all left the house in the morning and set off across the fields. Returned for meals. I think it was fairly normal tbh, or at least it was to hear him tell it because a load of his school mates did the same.
sparklybin · 31/10/2021 08:28

I was born 1986 can only remember being left from about 1990 so 4 years + sometimes was left alone or with sibling depending on what was happening on any given day. It was a big town.

I remember being about 8 in the pick and mix aisle in the supermarket and my dad who took me there alone left me there for ages he was supposed to be grabbing something quickly so I was a bit worried.

In the end I went to the front of the shop by the exit to wait thinking at least he can't leave without me here only to look out the window and see his car drive past as he'd forgotten me. Beginning to wonder if they were hoping someone might take us. We were pretty naughty dc Grin

OP posts:
Angel2702 · 31/10/2021 08:29

Not something that was done here neither us or any of our friends were ever left unsupervised in a shop. Good job really as my younger brother had a very scary incident where a man tried to lure him out of a toy shop, that was with us and our parents there.

theDudesmummy · 31/10/2021 08:30

At 8 I was happy to be left in the library for hours on end.

AdelindSchade · 31/10/2021 08:30

No. I was a child in the 70s and my parents would not have done that.

theDudesmummy · 31/10/2021 08:31

In the early 70s

Sidehustle99 · 31/10/2021 08:31

Not normal for and child under 11/12 no.

fiorentina · 31/10/2021 08:31

We used to stay in the car often, less so other shops. I don’t think it was unusual.

laurenGame · 31/10/2021 08:31

Born in Siberia - parents would leave prams with babies outside the shops/cafes etc. and go shopping and run errands. Outside there would be a big line with babies sleeping in prams. No one supervising. It was so safe.
Parents would come back after lunch or once all chores have been done, get their pram and go home 😀

PanicStationsAhh · 31/10/2021 08:31

Absolutely not normal in my experience of the 80s or 90s!

anunseemlylovefordustin · 31/10/2021 08:31

I definitely used to get left outside the supermarket in my pram while mum did the shopping (in the 70's). And when we were a little older (me about 8 or 9, my brothers 5 and 6) she would drop us off at the afternoon showing at the cinema in town, get all the errands done and then come and pick us up. That would have been early 80's. I think leaving kids semi-unattended was much less common/accepted in the 90's though, especially at 4 or 5.

Magicalwoodlands · 31/10/2021 08:32

Nowadays it’s true that most cases of child abuse are done by someone close to the victim but I think that’s a relatively recent phenomenon - or at least, I think abuse by strangers was once a lot more common.

It’s a crime of opportunity and there were certainly ample opportunities in the ‘good old days.’

Summerfun54321 · 31/10/2021 08:32

I never buy these “it was just what we did in ** era” excuses for shit parenting sorry. Of course it’s never been ok or normal to leave a 4/5 year old on their own in town.

Magicalwoodlands · 31/10/2021 08:33

It wasn’t okay but definitely normal once.